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DUmmie FUnnies 08-23-13 (Get DUmmie DainBramaged FIRED For Stealing Cable Box Remote At Work)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | August 23, 2013 | DUmmie DainBramaged, DUmmies, and PJ-Comix

Posted on 08/23/2013 9:49:39 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

Ok, mea culpa. I've been MIA with the DUFUs for far too long. My only excuse is that I got overwhelmed with incredible coupon deals the past 3 weeks. However, I am hoping to make up for it by presenting you all with a chance to don your Sherlock Holmes hats and do some detective work in discovering either who DUmmie DainBramaged is or where he/she/it works. Why? Because DUmmie DainBramaged has confessed to sabotaging his/her/its workplace by stealing their cable box and then lying to the management about it as you can see in this confessional THREAD, "I blocked FAUX on the TV at work today." Just by quickly glancing at this thread, I have already found out what type of work DUmmie DainBramaged does. And not only are there other clues in this thread, keep in mind that DUmmie DainBramaged has an extensive body of work in DUmmieland so more clues can be found there. And if DUmmie DainBramaged is fired, good luck trying to find another job in the Obama economy. So let us now examine the clues that DUmmie DainBramaged stupidly left us in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if anybody out there has noticed Fox News no longer on the tube at work, is in the [brackets]:

I blocked FAUX on the TV at work today

[And then STUPIDLY left clues of the crime posted for all to see in DUmmieland.]

felt good.

[How will it feel after you're FIRED, DUmmie DainBramaged?]

I replaced the remote that accesses the cable box channel sub- menus with a $5 basic remote and stashed the cable box remote in the rafters.

[Workplace SABOTAGE. Definitely a firing offense.]

F*ck the Pukes.

[And now to the rest of the DUmmies as well as more crime clues helpfully provided by DUmmie DainBramaged...]

1. That was an excellent move, my dear DainBramaged!

[An excellent move to the front of the unemployment line!]

Better would be to use the parent blocker and permanently block it.

[Stand by for DUmmie DainBramaged to boastfully drop another clue...]

I did then swapped the remote

[Hmmm... So now if the bossed finds the cable box remote stashed away in the rafters, all he has to do is check the parent blocker for confirmation of the crime.]

First moron that calls the cable co. to complain Wins "Dumbass of the Month"

[Shouldn't that award be given to DUmmie DainBramaged for STUPIDLY posting on the Web about the crime and then leaving us with helpful clues to track him/her/it down?]

there is a place in heaven for you.

[Somebody is already holding a place for DUmmie DainBramaged on the unemployment line.]

i've finally gotten the nerve to complain in public places and have been given the remote a couple times. the people who give it to me act as if they can't imagine why it matters.

[They also think you are an IDIOT but not as stupid as DUmmie DainBramaged who is on the way to a state of unemployment.]

That's a mighty big responsibility you've taken on there, deciding what others may or may not watch. You must be really important.

[Do I detect a note of sarcasm here?]

I understand the schadenfreude, but we should strive to be better than that.

[Would you settle for freudenschade?]

I also noted that she didn't just change the channel, she altered passwords and hid or stole the remote. Unless she promptly remedies her actions, the OP's conduct is no longer a simple prank. I doubt either she or anyone else would find it funny if her employer, quite justifiably, decided to punish her, or even terminate her employment. There is no "I hate Fox" exemption to at will employment.

[Actually all DUFUers would find it hilarious if SHE were fired. BTW, thanks for narrowing the gender of the perp down. Yet another helpful clue.]

Changing the channel is one thing, but blocking it and hiding the remote is destruction of property. If one of my employees did that, they'd be fired immediately.

[A thousand Sherlock Holmes out there will ensure the firing of DUmmie DainBramaged. Oh, and for a lot more helpful clues as to her ID or place of work, check out her JOURNAL. We also owe DUmmie Flatulo a debt for shaking up DUmmieDainBramaged enough to drop more clues. Here is Flatulo rattling the cage...]

The OP could close their eyes. Or walk way. Or quit. If I were the owner of the company and the OP was vandalizing my property to pusOh, so the TV was your private property, being used on your private property? No. What you did was no different than me coming into your home and blocking HGTV. The level and volume of your insults in lieu of a reasoned defense of your actions speaks volumes about your own principles. But you already know that. DainBramaged, I've read and enjoyed plenty of your posts here, and I think you're an OK guy/gal with the (usually) good intentions, but I'll always, always, always stand up and defend people's right to watch what they want on their TV and on their property. Simply changing the channel would have solved your problem. What you did was wrong, and insulting people who are pointing it out just shows how desperate you are to defend your own actions. You had no right to apply such censorship in the workplace.h an agenda, I would fire him or her.

Just f*cking stop with the lectures go bother someone who gives a shit

[The cage of DUmmie DainBramaged has been rattled and she is well on her way to dropping an inadvertent clue. Hee! Hee!]

Do let us know the response.

[Do give us a clue, DUmmie DainBramaged.]

I'll find out today when I go in. NO BODY under 60 watches that shit, and they turn it WAY up when they put F*CKED on so we'll see if it is quiet.

[Hmmm... It sounds like DUmmie DainBramaged just gave us a clue that she works somewhere with a lot of employees. But wait, DUmmie DainBramaged corrects an earlier clue given to us by another DUmmie and confirms he is a guy and even provides us the age...]

nce in a 'Blue Moon' ya gotta stand up for truth and PS I'm still a guy, 62 years on the plumbing hasn't changed LOLOL

[LOLOL!!! DUmmie DainBramaged just narrowed his age down to 62. Another great clue! Give us another, DUmmie DainBramaged, and live up to your name.]

i FORGOT TO MENTION, I made the 'landing' channel MSNBC (nbc News or whatever) so when the box is turned on they get Morning Schmoe

[Thank you for that, DUmmie DainBramaged. So if your new "landing" channel is now MSNBC switched from FOX, then it is a good chance you know who the saboteur is.]

while I agree with changing the channel, I feel it's kinda childish hiding the remote and buying a new one..(wahhh I don't like the channel so ill hide the remote so no one can turn it back on!) you wont get in trouble or anything for stealing the original remote and hiding it?

[Naw! DUmmie DainBramaged won't get in trouble...unless he STUPIDLY provides us with more MAJOR CLUES which he idiotically does...]

F*ck no I told them the original one broke from being dropped by the guerrillas who work here being SYSADMIN I can pretty much tell them anything....

[WOW! So now we know that DUmmie DainBramaged is a 62 year old guy (probably a hippie throwback) who is also a SYSADMIN. Oh, and thanx for telling us that you flat out LIED to the management. That will make the case for your FIRING when you are ultimately discovered. Of course, DUmmie DainBramaged would be QUICKLY discovered if FOX News posted this DUFU edition and put out the word asking as to which workplace is now getting MSNBC instead of FOX. Then merely place a laser beam upon the forehead of a 62 year old male SYSADMIN and you have your culprit about to be FIRED. Even if FOX News does not perform this service the Sherlock Holmes army is now investigating the many other DUmmie DainBramaged posts for clues. For example, has he ever mentioned working at a mental hospital?]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummiedainbramaged; dummies
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To: PJ-Comix

Sounds like a fun hobby, playing commie lib detector. If this person is an IT person and fired, he will most likely be replaced by an H1B since no native born or legal immigrant would be good enough.


21 posted on 08/23/2013 10:49:51 AM PDT by wally_bert (There are no winners in a game of losers. I'm Tommy Joyce, welcome to the Oriental Lounge.)
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To: PJ-Comix

What’s more, another DUmmie, “OPERATIONMINDCRIME” bought a car from Mr. Dain. Who’s 62. I can’t see profiles, but I wonder of some enterprising individual who has a DUmmie account might be able to get a location for either one of these dillweeds?


22 posted on 08/23/2013 10:50:20 AM PDT by Cyber Liberty (It wasn't the Rodeo Clown's act, it was the crowd reaction they could't take.)
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To: PJ-Comix

DainBramaged (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-07-09 08:55 AM
Response to Reply #6
8. Yup, they be everywhere......
Edited on Wed Oct-07-09 09:01 AM by DainBramaged

And what is even more bizzaro world, I, a loyal employee, who sticks up for GM here, when I smack them (deservedly) the thread gets unrecd. DU has become a kindergarten of the stoopid.

...well, he’s says he’s a loyal employee of GM. Could be a dealership guy in charge of their computers.


23 posted on 08/23/2013 10:55:43 AM PDT by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: Secret Agent Man

I also found out he described himself as 5’10” and 240 lbs. Supposedly lives in the reddest county of New Jersey but that could be an exaggeration.


24 posted on 08/23/2013 11:04:08 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Beware of the Rip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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To: PJ-Comix
i've finally gotten the nerve to complain in public places and have been given the remote a couple times. the people who give it to me act as if they can't imagine why it matters.

I hate having to go to airports and they have pmsnbc or other liberal crap on the TV. I've asked to have the TV changed to Fox, and most have done so for me. We were in Phoenix waiting for a flight change and almost every TV was on Fox.

25 posted on 08/23/2013 11:10:50 AM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (The Second Amendment is NOT about the right to hunt. It IS a right to shoot tyrants.)
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To: PJ-Comix

On another line is their management stupid? Why didn’t they ask for the old remote? A cheap universal remote doesn’t do all of the functions needed to run a cable box correctly. Many cable and satellite providers will replace the remote for free or at least cheap.


26 posted on 08/23/2013 11:14:52 AM PDT by Hillarys Gate Cult (Liberals make unrealistic demands on reality and reality doesn't oblige them.)
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To: PJ-Comix

A red county in New Jersey? Now that is interesting. I’m mighty curious to know what parts of the eastern states are conservative.


27 posted on 08/23/2013 11:16:29 AM PDT by driftless2
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To: Arrowhead1952

Got to split for awhile but we are already hot of the trail of self-confessed criminal DUmmie DainBramaged. We know this perp is a SYSADMIN for a Chevy dealership in New Jersey and is 5’10” and 240 pounds. If caught and captured, please keep the perp subdued with a box of Krispy Kremes. If perp makes any loud noises, please place a leather strap inside of mouth until human resources management can arrive for the termination process. The perp will then be free to leave his workplace but may be unable to do so since he is stuck on stupid.


28 posted on 08/23/2013 11:17:49 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Beware of the Rip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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To: PJ-Comix

How funny! Now all that has to happen is for a FReeper or 2 to show up at Chevy dealerships and locate the one where it’s impossible to get Fox.


29 posted on 08/23/2013 11:18:03 AM PDT by definitelynotaliberal
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To: PJ-Comix

Haha, yeah I remember that one, when Pitt Stop inadvertently revealed he was a molestor.


30 posted on 08/23/2013 11:55:13 AM PDT by Boogieman
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To: Boogieman

So... what happened? I must have been taking a break from FR at the time.


31 posted on 08/23/2013 12:11:51 PM PDT by Luircin
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To: PJ-Comix
Another trail of clues. Since he is an IT guy, I figure he is also the user "DainBramaged" on the anandtech.com forums, where a lot of IT guys hang out. Here's a couple threads he posted there years ago, but the links are broken now, so we can't see his pictures. Still, from what I gather, he was driving a 1990 V12 Jaguar back in 2009, and totaled a Maxima he was driving in 2003.

**UPDATE** Car totaled!!! Got in a nasty wreck (for my car) today **PICS**

Got a new (old) car...

32 posted on 08/23/2013 12:15:53 PM PDT by Boogieman
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To: PJ-Comix
Just f*cking stop with the lectures go bother someone who gives a shit

DainBramaged came bragging about his exploits to the DUmp hoping for a virtual victory parade. Not getting the universal love he expected, I guess.

33 posted on 08/23/2013 12:30:36 PM PDT by kevkrom (It's not "immigration reform", it's an "amnesty bill". Take back the language!)
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To: driftless2
A red county in New Jersey? Now that is interesting. I’m mighty curious to know what parts of the eastern states are conservative.

Here is a start: a map of NJ by party of each House of Reps member:

The third district is represented by a GOP member who won it from a Dem in 2010.

34 posted on 08/23/2013 12:30:45 PM PDT by pogo101
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To: PJ-Comix
The last time we did this Sherlock Holmes routine was to track down the ID of Temperorary SockPuppet years ago. Gee, That was a really tough case to crack.

That one was so easy, Watson could have cracked it.

Emma Watson.

Who would have been something like 15 years old at the time.

35 posted on 08/23/2013 12:34:34 PM PDT by kevkrom (It's not "immigration reform", it's an "amnesty bill". Take back the language!)
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To: Luircin

Read all about it:

http://dummiefunnies.blogspot.com/2006/01/dummie-funnies-01-16-06-sherlock.html


36 posted on 08/23/2013 12:36:39 PM PDT by Boogieman
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To: kevkrom
For DUmmie DainBramaged, the latter day Raskolnikov:

“Do you understand, sir, do you understand what it means when you have absolutely nowhere to turn?"

37 posted on 08/23/2013 1:18:44 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (Beware of the Rip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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To: PJ-Comix

Could it be a moonlighting Chris Christie, the donut king?


38 posted on 08/23/2013 1:19:40 PM PDT by Newtoidaho
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To: Newtoidaho

It’s going to be a LOOOOOOOOOONG weekend for DUmmie DainBranaged. Right about now he must be getting ready to go home from work, possibly unaware that we are HOT on his trail. Then worrying all weekend about whether there will be a pink slip awaiting him monday morning. Before then we should learn the exact location of where he works. A simple phone call is made, an inquiry about if they were recently unable to get FOX News on their TV, and finally a revelation of sabotage by their own SYSADMIN.


39 posted on 08/23/2013 1:28:41 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (Beware of the Rip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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To: Charles Henrickson
The noose tightens... This is what info I now have from the Conservative Cave:

The auto dealership that DUmmie DainBramaged most likely works at is Ayers Chevy in Dover, NJ. Perhaps somebody on our DUFU list lives in that area and can pay a visit to find out if they recently lost FOX News on their TVs in favor of MSNBC. Then ask if they employ a deranged 62 year old SYSADMIN. Perhaps they might also want to check out the rafters for the missing cable box remote.

40 posted on 08/23/2013 1:37:22 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (Beware of the Rip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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