Posted on 08/23/2013 9:49:39 AM PDT by PJ-Comix
Ok, mea culpa. I've been MIA with the DUFUs for far too long. My only excuse is that I got overwhelmed with incredible coupon deals the past 3 weeks. However, I am hoping to make up for it by presenting you all with a chance to don your Sherlock Holmes hats and do some detective work in discovering either who DUmmie DainBramaged is or where he/she/it works. Why? Because DUmmie DainBramaged has confessed to sabotaging his/her/its workplace by stealing their cable box and then lying to the management about it as you can see in this confessional THREAD, "I blocked FAUX on the TV at work today." Just by quickly glancing at this thread, I have already found out what type of work DUmmie DainBramaged does. And not only are there other clues in this thread, keep in mind that DUmmie DainBramaged has an extensive body of work in DUmmieland so more clues can be found there. And if DUmmie DainBramaged is fired, good luck trying to find another job in the Obama economy. So let us now examine the clues that DUmmie DainBramaged stupidly left us in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if anybody out there has noticed Fox News no longer on the tube at work, is in the [brackets]:
I blocked FAUX on the TV at work today
[And then STUPIDLY left clues of the crime posted for all to see in DUmmieland.]
felt good.
[How will it feel after you're FIRED, DUmmie DainBramaged?]
I replaced the remote that accesses the cable box channel sub- menus with a $5 basic remote and stashed the cable box remote in the rafters.
[Workplace SABOTAGE. Definitely a firing offense.]
F*ck the Pukes.
[And now to the rest of the DUmmies as well as more crime clues helpfully provided by DUmmie DainBramaged...]
1. That was an excellent move, my dear DainBramaged!
[An excellent move to the front of the unemployment line!]
Better would be to use the parent blocker and permanently block it.
[Stand by for DUmmie DainBramaged to boastfully drop another clue...]
I did then swapped the remote
[Hmmm... So now if the bossed finds the cable box remote stashed away in the rafters, all he has to do is check the parent blocker for confirmation of the crime.]
First moron that calls the cable co. to complain Wins "Dumbass of the Month"
[Shouldn't that award be given to DUmmie DainBramaged for STUPIDLY posting on the Web about the crime and then leaving us with helpful clues to track him/her/it down?]
there is a place in heaven for you.
[Somebody is already holding a place for DUmmie DainBramaged on the unemployment line.]
i've finally gotten the nerve to complain in public places and have been given the remote a couple times. the people who give it to me act as if they can't imagine why it matters.
[They also think you are an IDIOT but not as stupid as DUmmie DainBramaged who is on the way to a state of unemployment.]
That's a mighty big responsibility you've taken on there, deciding what others may or may not watch. You must be really important.
[Do I detect a note of sarcasm here?]
I understand the schadenfreude, but we should strive to be better than that.
[Would you settle for freudenschade?]
I also noted that she didn't just change the channel, she altered passwords and hid or stole the remote. Unless she promptly remedies her actions, the OP's conduct is no longer a simple prank. I doubt either she or anyone else would find it funny if her employer, quite justifiably, decided to punish her, or even terminate her employment. There is no "I hate Fox" exemption to at will employment.
[Actually all DUFUers would find it hilarious if SHE were fired. BTW, thanks for narrowing the gender of the perp down. Yet another helpful clue.]
Changing the channel is one thing, but blocking it and hiding the remote is destruction of property. If one of my employees did that, they'd be fired immediately.
[A thousand Sherlock Holmes out there will ensure the firing of DUmmie DainBramaged. Oh, and for a lot more helpful clues as to her ID or place of work, check out her JOURNAL. We also owe DUmmie Flatulo a debt for shaking up DUmmieDainBramaged enough to drop more clues. Here is Flatulo rattling the cage...]
The OP could close their eyes. Or walk way. Or quit. If I were the owner of the company and the OP was vandalizing my property to pusOh, so the TV was your private property, being used on your private property? No. What you did was no different than me coming into your home and blocking HGTV. The level and volume of your insults in lieu of a reasoned defense of your actions speaks volumes about your own principles. But you already know that. DainBramaged, I've read and enjoyed plenty of your posts here, and I think you're an OK guy/gal with the (usually) good intentions, but I'll always, always, always stand up and defend people's right to watch what they want on their TV and on their property. Simply changing the channel would have solved your problem. What you did was wrong, and insulting people who are pointing it out just shows how desperate you are to defend your own actions. You had no right to apply such censorship in the workplace.h an agenda, I would fire him or her.
Just f*cking stop with the lectures go bother someone who gives a shit
[The cage of DUmmie DainBramaged has been rattled and she is well on her way to dropping an inadvertent clue. Hee! Hee!]
Do let us know the response.
[Do give us a clue, DUmmie DainBramaged.]
I'll find out today when I go in. NO BODY under 60 watches that shit, and they turn it WAY up when they put F*CKED on so we'll see if it is quiet.
[Hmmm... It sounds like DUmmie DainBramaged just gave us a clue that she works somewhere with a lot of employees. But wait, DUmmie DainBramaged corrects an earlier clue given to us by another DUmmie and confirms he is a guy and even provides us the age...]
nce in a 'Blue Moon' ya gotta stand up for truth and PS I'm still a guy, 62 years on the plumbing hasn't changed LOLOL
[LOLOL!!! DUmmie DainBramaged just narrowed his age down to 62. Another great clue! Give us another, DUmmie DainBramaged, and live up to your name.]
i FORGOT TO MENTION, I made the 'landing' channel MSNBC (nbc News or whatever) so when the box is turned on they get Morning Schmoe
[Thank you for that, DUmmie DainBramaged. So if your new "landing" channel is now MSNBC switched from FOX, then it is a good chance you know who the saboteur is.]
while I agree with changing the channel, I feel it's kinda childish hiding the remote and buying a new one..(wahhh I don't like the channel so ill hide the remote so no one can turn it back on!) you wont get in trouble or anything for stealing the original remote and hiding it?
[Naw! DUmmie DainBramaged won't get in trouble...unless he STUPIDLY provides us with more MAJOR CLUES which he idiotically does...]
F*ck no I told them the original one broke from being dropped by the guerrillas who work here being SYSADMIN I can pretty much tell them anything....
[WOW! So now we know that DUmmie DainBramaged is a 62 year old guy (probably a hippie throwback) who is also a SYSADMIN. Oh, and thanx for telling us that you flat out LIED to the management. That will make the case for your FIRING when you are ultimately discovered. Of course, DUmmie DainBramaged would be QUICKLY discovered if FOX News posted this DUFU edition and put out the word asking as to which workplace is now getting MSNBC instead of FOX. Then merely place a laser beam upon the forehead of a 62 year old male SYSADMIN and you have your culprit about to be FIRED. Even if FOX News does not perform this service the Sherlock Holmes army is now investigating the many other DUmmie DainBramaged posts for clues. For example, has he ever mentioned working at a mental hospital?]
I'm sure his fellow workers know of his TV remote sabotage so the next few days, which will be his last, has to be very uncomfortable for DB.
BOSS: Mr Bulna, step AWAY from the computer and assume the fetal position!
DB: I don't understand.
BOSS: You don't? Well, we understand that you SABOTAGED our TV by hiding the remote in the rafters!
DB: Who told you that?
BOSS: You did you sick moron. You posted it on the Web like a complete idiot for all to see.
DB: I can explain that.
BOSS: Yeah, you said you can make us believe anything. Well, guess what? We aren't buying your BS anymore!
DB: But...but...
BOSS: You just SHUT UP you sick bastard and continue maintaining the fetal position on the floor.
DB: I think I'm losing my blood circulation in this position.
BOSS: Well, we already know you lost your mind. And now we have to go thru the expense and effort to see what other sickness you perpetrated in the computer system.
DB: Um, I need this job. Will I be able to stay on?
BOSS: You'll stay on until we finish checking out our computer systems.
DB: And after that I still have a job?
BOSS: What do you think, moron?
DB: Jeepers, Creepers, I HATE the FREEPERS!
But then, I'm a big believer in repentance, forgiveness, and amendment of life.
They might want to give him a drug test...
http://forum.grasscity.com/apprentice-tokers/730934-2grams-dank-eighth-mids.html
His punishment should be that he MUST face a TV set at work with FOX News on it at all times except from noon to three when he will be forced to listen to Rush Limbaugh. Of course, all this time he has to endure the snickering by other Gearhart employees who are laughing behind his back at his STUPIDITY to confessing all on the Web and thinking he could get away with it.
BOSS: Mr. Bulna, drop your pants, pull out Tiny Tim, and PEE into this bottle!
DB: You won't make me drink it, will you?
I wonder what his Neanderthal co workers thought of his
posts ?
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023262752
Maybe he got his computer play time taken away at work.
Where you at DB ?
You mean like Amazing Grace?
Amazing grace! How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost, but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.
Well, DB's a wretch alright but I think he is permanently LOST, never to be found. And I doubt if he will see the light. He is doomed to remain forever on the Dark Side.
Good song, however. Best sung by Ronan Tynan at Ronald Reagan's funeral as you can see HERE.
I saw the comments on FB and maybe he saw them and removed them? Maybe the dealership has no idea....
KISSED MY MONEY BYE-BYE (The Day the Money Died)
Tune: "American Pie"
As sung by DainBramaged
A long, long time ago
I can still remember how their money used to give me glee
But I knew if I had my chance
That I could break their Fox News trance
And maybe they'd be lib'ral just like me
The television made me quiver
With every program it delivered
Fox News on the TV
I couldn't let them see me
I took the changer from its side
Then I found a place where it could hide
But something made me brag with pride
The day the money died
Oh my, I kissed my money bye-bye
Drove my Chevy dealer crazy
With my little white lie
Told them good ol' boys our old remote up and died
Thinkin' this'll be the way that I try--
Hide it in the rafters and lie . . .
(Cut to the end, 7:47)
And now I'm singin' . . .
Why'd I spread my little white lie?
Told the DUmmies it was funny
How I hid it so high
But them lousy freeps were thinkin' "Who is this guy?"
And with this I kissed my money bye-bye
With this I kissed my money bye-bye
Now I'm singin' . . .
Why'd I spread my little white lie?
Told the DUmmies it was funny
How I hid it so high
Them lousy freeps were thinkin' "Who is this guy?"
And with this I kissed my money bye-bye!
I have to wonder what, if anything, happened
do you suppose that DB is in charge of the company website/facebook page?
LOL! Hilarious song parody! I hope DB appreciates it.
Wow! I haven’t seen this thread since the top 10.
Well done Charles!
Quite likely. Companies with a small net footprint seem to like to have one person handle webpage and other internet stuff so nobody else gets distracted by it.
Someone might fire off some emails to the staff, are these listed at the site?
Bump
LOL !!!
I am laughing so hard !!!
These jerks got the media on lockdown with pro Obama news 24.7/365. And there is one channel that is semi-conservative and they can’t stand that people watch it? I never got that, liberals are facist and control freaks.
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