[Charles Henrickson]

[Charles Henrickson]

PING!

[cripplecreek]

What I'm envisioning.

[cripplecreek]

Lets just hope this guy didn’t see the news out of Cleveland.

[FlingWingFlyer]

I’ve got the perfect girlfriends for that first jughead. Elana Kagen and Butchie Napolitano.

[2ndDivisionVet]

DUmmie Locut0s:

Asian Kisses
http://www.asiankisses.de

Plenty of Fish
http://www.pof.com/

Craigslist
http://www.craigslist.org

[2ndDivisionVet]

You know, we laugh at that guy in the photo, but he’s laughing all the way to the bank. Another one, David Icke, has built a cottage industry out of the whole thing.

[Caipirabob]

The horrific mental image this thread gave me will haunt my dreams...

[rockrr]

Awesome personality, I get along with most people.

...except those filthy 'wingers. right?

[Roscoe Karns]

I hasten to add that since each man will be required to do
prodigious...service along these lines, the women will have to be selected for
their sexual characteristics which will have to be of a highly stimulating nature.

[Billthedrill]

31 year old virgin with a bunch of mental baggage.
Depression and anxiety.
Never so much as held hands with a girl.
Still live at home with parents.
Having problems living in the world due to emotional issues.
Put on a few extra pounds.

Dear Desperate:

You have to expand your aspirations. There's more to life than just getting laid, being with a supermodel, enjoying those intimate dinners and those steamy hot tub sessions that culminate in a rubdown with an ostrich feather in a wading pool full of purple jello. That's all fun, to be sure. I know because it happens to me all the time. The reason it happens to me is that I'm an online relationship counselor, not a worthless, unemployed, neurotic tub of lard like you. You pay for my Lamborghini and my condo in Maui, Desperate, and I'm totally grateful, but the whole gravy train comes to a screeching halt if you should attain happiness in life and stop asking embarrassing questions to thousands of anonymous people on a website that's already full of fat, worthless sacks of donkey crap who are wondering the same thing. Take a look at their wasted lives, Desperate, and ask yourself, "Should I be taking relationship advice from guys who couldn't get laid in a Thai whorehouse with hundred-dollar bills glued to their hairy, hanging guts?" Sure there's hope, Desperate, the world is full of it, bright, clean, shining hope that is gushing like a fountain from a fertile and nurturing earth. But not for you.

sincerely,

BilltheDrill
Online Relationship Counselor

[Roscoe Karns]

Nadin: “Ah yes, space travel. I am quiet well-versed on the subject you know. Take, for example, the...” Room clears out in 3.8 seconds

[Cyber Liberty]

Nor is there an escape from the cosmic radiation, except for launching more mass as shielding.

How stoopid do you have to be to not figure out how to dig a freaking hole? Send a Marine there. Tell him he needs to erect gamma-ray shielding. He'll have a tunnel half way to Olympus Mons by morning.

[erod]

What a douche. Have a problem getting girls I have the cure:

Get some confidence

Workout and eat right

Believe in yourself and trust God that He will find you the right person

Don't be an effeminate, girly man, liberal

Works for me!!! :P

[Rides_A_Red_Horse]

Awesome personality, I get along with most people.

---

People who get along with most people piss me off.

[Old Sarge]

Here's our lovelorn DUmmie on webcam:

[PJ-Comix]

[This is a thread posted by DUmmie Locut0s, who apparently lacks hope for success with the ladiesc. Let's find out why.]

Perhaps he needs some romantic advice from DUmmie Steve Numbers.

(Back from my BEST couponing day ever but if I told you how well I did and how, it would turn you into a Coupon Atheist and I wouldn't blame anyone for not believing what I did so I won't say.)

[PJ-Comix]

Initially probably looking for sex above other things

You want a coupon for the Manhattan Club in TJ? Or perhaps for the Brooklyn Bar across the street?

[PJ-Comix]

I'd probably get up there and immediately sh*t my pants.

Is that you, Al Roker?

[PJ-Comix]

I'm not a relationship expert, but I would have to guess that you aren't around women enough to meet any.

Easiest way to meet women is to give them coupon advice in a supermarket and then give them coupons. I actually did this as an experiment a couple of years ago when they had Lactaid Milk Blinkie coupons for $2. It didn't state the size and quarts of Lactaid were only $2.19 and only 19 cents after the coupon. As an experiment I just stood by the blinkie in the milk department and whenever a hot looking chick came by I would just point at the Blinkie machine and then at the Lactaid. This got their curiosity up and they came over to me at which point I pulled a coupon from the Blinkie machine and showed them. Then I pointed again at the quarts of Lactaid and said my first words, "Just apply this coupon to the Lactaid quart and you only pay 19 cents."

At that point they were usually overjoyed at that deal and from then on we conversed quite a bit on a range of mostly coupon related topics. Since I'm married I had to do Catch and Release. But it could have been just "Catch" in most cases.

Later when my wife started griping about the Lactaid which I filled the refrigerator and freezer with, I started having second thoughts about the "Release" part. Lucky for her that I swore to remain eternally faithful to Playboy Playmate Petra Verkaik.

[PJ-Comix]

volunteer and community work. . . .

DUAC! DUAC!