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Zombie attacks might increase due to global warming, study shows
http://wmbriggs.com/blog/2008/01/31/zombie-attacks-might-increase-due-to-global-warming-study-shows/ ^
| William M Briggs
Posted on 01/31/2008 3:36:33 PM PST by mattstat
A new study by scientists has suggested that zombie attacks might increase if the current projections of global warming are realized. “If the earth gets warmer, it means longer springs, summers, and falls, and shorter winters,” said John Carpenter-Romero, Ph.D., a zombie-ologist who co-authored the study. “And shorter winters means more time for the undead to prey on the populace.”
Dr. Harrister, the other co-author, and head of Zombie Robotics at Wayward Robot, Inc., explained that cold winters typically stalled the walking dead. “It is well known that zombies can’t operate in cold weather. It freezes their brains.”
The pair calculated a 32.782412% increase in zombie attacks if CO2 increased to twice its pre-industrial rate. “Clearly, this is a very troubling result,” said Dr. Harrister, “If we don’t do something soon, the streets will be filled with blood.”
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: allyourzotrbelong2us; callingartbell; globalwarming; molassesmiasma; monkeyfacerules; undead; undeadthread; zombies; zotemifyougotem
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To: Darksheare
941
posted on
02/09/2008 10:30:14 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He who laughs last probably didn't get the joke.)
To: Monkey Face
Something flasmmable and drinkable was suggested.
942
posted on
02/09/2008 10:31:02 AM PST
by
Darksheare
(Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
To: Darksheare
943
posted on
02/09/2008 10:33:47 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He who laughs last probably didn't get the joke.)
To: NicknamedBob; Darksheare; Monkey Face
"Some have even cheered their fellow squirrels."
I had to hunt for it, but here is my alltime fav squirrel commercial:
Geico Squirrel Commercial
944
posted on
02/09/2008 10:33:56 AM PST
by
callisto
(CONGRESS.SYS corrupted...Re-boot Washington DC (Y/N)?)
To: Darksheare
"Something flasmmable ..." You always add elegance to our vocabulary.
945
posted on
02/09/2008 10:34:10 AM PST
by
NicknamedBob
(When will John McCain realize those MSM slaps on the back were just posting "Kick Me!" signs?)
To: NicknamedBob
“You always add elegance to our vocabulary.”
Typo-disease is contagious. You know? “adn”, “teh” ...
946
posted on
02/09/2008 10:36:23 AM PST
by
callisto
(CONGRESS.SYS corrupted...Re-boot Washington DC (Y/N)?)
To: callisto; Darksheare
It’s the typo virus again.
947
posted on
02/09/2008 10:37:57 AM PST
by
darkangel82
(If you're not part of the solution, you are part of the problem. (Say no to RINOs))
To: Darksheare
I’m cutting mine with Heineken today. LOL...let me know when my posts reflect it
948
posted on
02/09/2008 10:38:24 AM PST
by
callisto
(CONGRESS.SYS corrupted...Re-boot Washington DC (Y/N)?)
To: callisto
I’ll do that, if you’ll let me know when my posts reflect the vodka...;o]
949
posted on
02/09/2008 10:40:18 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He who laughs last probably didn't get the joke.)
To: NicknamedBob
Flame, plasma, I dunno...
950
posted on
02/09/2008 10:40:33 AM PST
by
Darksheare
(Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
To: darkangel82; callisto
Always strikes when I least expect it.
951
posted on
02/09/2008 10:41:49 AM PST
by
Darksheare
(Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
To: Monkey Face
Deal! I think we should be able work together well.
952
posted on
02/09/2008 10:43:33 AM PST
by
callisto
(CONGRESS.SYS corrupted...Re-boot Washington DC (Y/N)?)
To: Darksheare
Well, I’m assuming you don’t have to deal with finger nail complications. (I’m looking for any excuse...he he!)
953
posted on
02/09/2008 10:44:48 AM PST
by
callisto
(CONGRESS.SYS corrupted...Re-boot Washington DC (Y/N)?)
To: callisto
Nope.
Just terrible typing skills.
954
posted on
02/09/2008 10:45:41 AM PST
by
Darksheare
(Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
To: callisto
Besides, it’d be creepy for me to have long nails.
955
posted on
02/09/2008 10:47:19 AM PST
by
Darksheare
(Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
To: callisto
And if we can’t, who will care by the end of the day?
;o]
956
posted on
02/09/2008 10:49:02 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He who laughs last probably didn't get the joke.)
To: Darksheare
Halloween, it’s permissible. (but only then)
957
posted on
02/09/2008 10:49:47 AM PST
by
callisto
(CONGRESS.SYS corrupted...Re-boot Washington DC (Y/N)?)
To: Monkey Face
Those who can’t read my nonsensical posts...LOL!
958
posted on
02/09/2008 10:50:48 AM PST
by
callisto
(CONGRESS.SYS corrupted...Re-boot Washington DC (Y/N)?)
To: callisto
Fangs are more useful, year round.
;-)
959
posted on
02/09/2008 10:51:59 AM PST
by
Darksheare
(Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
To: callisto; NicknamedBob; sionnsar; Dead Corpse; tuliptree76
There are a lot of “nonsensical” posts on the UT...which is why it’s so fun!
Of course, having a Flying Castle helps...
960
posted on
02/09/2008 10:53:30 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He who laughs last probably didn't get the joke.)
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