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Zombie attacks might increase due to global warming, study shows
http://wmbriggs.com/blog/2008/01/31/zombie-attacks-might-increase-due-to-global-warming-study-shows/ ^
| William M Briggs
Posted on 01/31/2008 3:36:33 PM PST by mattstat
A new study by scientists has suggested that zombie attacks might increase if the current projections of global warming are realized. “If the earth gets warmer, it means longer springs, summers, and falls, and shorter winters,” said John Carpenter-Romero, Ph.D., a zombie-ologist who co-authored the study. “And shorter winters means more time for the undead to prey on the populace.”
Dr. Harrister, the other co-author, and head of Zombie Robotics at Wayward Robot, Inc., explained that cold winters typically stalled the walking dead. “It is well known that zombies can’t operate in cold weather. It freezes their brains.”
The pair calculated a 32.782412% increase in zombie attacks if CO2 increased to twice its pre-industrial rate. “Clearly, this is a very troubling result,” said Dr. Harrister, “If we don’t do something soon, the streets will be filled with blood.”
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: allyourzotrbelong2us; callingartbell; globalwarming; molassesmiasma; monkeyfacerules; undead; undeadthread; zombies; zotemifyougotem
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To: Monkey Face
And you to yours. I am fading surprisingly quickly...
1,941
posted on
02/22/2008 6:04:56 PM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: sionnsar
Why am I not surprised?...
Sweet dreams!
1,942
posted on
02/22/2008 6:05:43 PM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He's so lazy he put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.)
To: Monkey Face
Dreams that do not include airplanes are almost inherently sweet..
Sleep well.
1,943
posted on
02/22/2008 6:23:20 PM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: sionnsar
1,944
posted on
02/22/2008 6:24:21 PM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He's so lazy he put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.)
To: Monkey Face
To you too - I am fading fast...
1,945
posted on
02/22/2008 6:40:21 PM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: sionnsar
So why do you keep answering me?...I keep expecting you to keel over and start snoring...but you keep posting...
Whassupwithat?
:o]
1,946
posted on
02/22/2008 6:43:10 PM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He's so lazy he put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.)
To: Monkey Face; sionnsar
Both must be snoring by now...
1,947
posted on
02/22/2008 11:31:22 PM PST
by
rottndog
(When are we gonna have a Leap Century???)
To: All
Good Morning from the left coast.
Supposed to rain like heck today.
1,948
posted on
02/23/2008 6:01:50 AM PST
by
rottndog
(When are we gonna have a Leap Century???)
To: Monkey Face
I keep expecting you to keel over and start snoring... I did. 'Morning!
1,949
posted on
02/23/2008 6:12:58 AM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: Monkey Face; sionnsar
Oh, nothing. Just checking to see what’s new in the Undead Thread.
All’s quiet. No zombies around on Saturday mornings.
1,950
posted on
02/23/2008 6:16:54 AM PST
by
JoanVarga
("¿Por qué no te calles?")
To: JoanVarga
No Zombies are stirring yet....Just denizens.
1,951
posted on
02/23/2008 6:19:04 AM PST
by
rottndog
(When are we gonna have a Leap Century???)
To: rottndog
Mmmm....denizens....have brains....
1,952
posted on
02/23/2008 6:47:24 AM PST
by
JoanVarga
("¿Por qué no te calles?")
To: sionnsar; Monkey Face; GregoTX; abigailsmybaby; KoRn; GrammaBear; Eaker; Lady Jag; rottndog
This is the best thread ever. Can we stay here next month too?
I’ve finally gotten my area decorated just like I wanted it!
1,953
posted on
02/23/2008 6:54:33 AM PST
by
NonLinear
("They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge." -Thomas B Reed)
To: JoanVarga; rottndog; sionnsar; Dead Corpse; Tax-chick; NicknamedBob; Darksheare
It’s morning. I think.
The zombies are hard at work in the Lower Levels. They never sleep, y’know. The Dust Bunnies keep them quite busy.
I don’t know about the spiderbots, though. They might be fomenting a rebellion.
Or devising some ‘splodey things for entertainment.
1,954
posted on
02/23/2008 6:57:38 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He's so lazy he put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.)
To: NonLinear; sionnsar
It sorta grows on ya, don’t it?
Morning, NL!
1,955
posted on
02/23/2008 6:59:46 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He's so lazy he put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.)
To: Monkey Face
My Offspring are conspiring to blow up (or burn, or smash) a sugar-cube pyramid that Elen made for the Egypt display. Elen wanted to eat the sugar, even though it’s been glued ... We feed them, honestly!
1,956
posted on
02/23/2008 7:00:13 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
(If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't shoot! It might be a lemur!)
To: Tax-chick
I don’t even know if we could find sugar cubes here. I like them myself. It was a clever idea.
And as for “feeding them honestly,” I don’t know how you could do it DIShonestly and live to tell sbout it. *snigger*
1,957
posted on
02/23/2008 7:04:10 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He's so lazy he put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.)
To: Monkey Face
Well, I dishonestly gave them a bunch of Girl Scout cookies that we were supposed to deliver to other people ... but my Cookie Mom got me some more :-).
1,958
posted on
02/23/2008 7:08:37 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
(If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't shoot! It might be a lemur!)
To: NonLinear
This is the best thread ever. Can we stay here next month too?
I’ve finally gotten my area decorated just like I wanted it! We could, at the pace in which we're posting, but I seem to recall there is already a fun new thread awaiting our arrival.
1,959
posted on
02/23/2008 7:10:16 AM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: Tax-chick
LOL!
I’m sure the same thing would have happened to me, had I been the Keeper of the GS Kookies! LOL!
1,960
posted on
02/23/2008 7:11:44 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(He's so lazy he put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.)
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