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Zombie attacks might increase due to global warming, study shows
http://wmbriggs.com/blog/2008/01/31/zombie-attacks-might-increase-due-to-global-warming-study-shows/ ^
| William M Briggs
Posted on 01/31/2008 3:36:33 PM PST by mattstat
A new study by scientists has suggested that zombie attacks might increase if the current projections of global warming are realized. “If the earth gets warmer, it means longer springs, summers, and falls, and shorter winters,” said John Carpenter-Romero, Ph.D., a zombie-ologist who co-authored the study. “And shorter winters means more time for the undead to prey on the populace.”
Dr. Harrister, the other co-author, and head of Zombie Robotics at Wayward Robot, Inc., explained that cold winters typically stalled the walking dead. “It is well known that zombies can’t operate in cold weather. It freezes their brains.”
The pair calculated a 32.782412% increase in zombie attacks if CO2 increased to twice its pre-industrial rate. “Clearly, this is a very troubling result,” said Dr. Harrister, “If we don’t do something soon, the streets will be filled with blood.”
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: allyourzotrbelong2us; callingartbell; globalwarming; molassesmiasma; monkeyfacerules; undead; undeadthread; zombies; zotemifyougotem
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To: NicknamedBob
Nice to know we’re making progress with the moon settlement. I’m looking forward to retiring there in 30 years or so!
1,841
posted on
02/21/2008 5:11:03 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
(If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't shoot! It might be a lemur!)
To: Tax-chick; Dead Corpse; Monkey Face
How come people are here when I have to not be?
1,842
posted on
02/21/2008 5:37:10 AM PST
by
NicknamedBob
(If straw man Obama hadn't been so active, Dorothy's water toss wouldn't have made Hillary melt down.)
To: NicknamedBob
I have to get to work, too. Girl Scouts!
1,843
posted on
02/21/2008 5:37:45 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
(If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't shoot! It might be a lemur!)
To: NicknamedBob
Coffee time. I'm sitting here, drinking my coffee, beating up on one of my least favorite trolls on an FR RKBA thread, reading The Register, checking out a link from Physorg.com, chatting with an Australian on a Canadian Goth forum, and compiling some code on a Linux box via an SSH shell.
Typical morning in DC World...
1,844
posted on
02/21/2008 5:56:03 AM PST
by
Dead Corpse
(What would a free man do?)
To: NicknamedBob
Uh...
You get up too early?
;o]
1,845
posted on
02/21/2008 6:38:12 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(It's not the load that breaks you down but the way you carry it.)
To: Dead Corpse
Wow. I thought you only had two arms, DC.
What a guy! Multi-tasking seems to be easy for you...
Morning!
I may get some coffee in a few minutes. Not quite awake enough to fix it, right now.
1,846
posted on
02/21/2008 6:41:30 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(It's not the load that breaks you down but the way you carry it.)
To: Monkey Face
It keeps me out of trouble at least. ;-)
That's why I prep my coffee the night before. Push a button, and it doesn't matter how sleepy I am the next morning.
1,847
posted on
02/21/2008 6:54:47 AM PST
by
Dead Corpse
(What would a free man do?)
To: Dead Corpse
I don’t drink a full pot...just one cup, once in a while. I love coffee, but just don’t drink it much any more.
1,848
posted on
02/21/2008 7:08:03 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(It's not the load that breaks you down but the way you carry it.)
To: Monkey Face; Dead Corpse
I don’t drink a full pot...just one cup, once in a while.
Oh, I drink coffee by the pot...and what a good pot it is!
1,849
posted on
02/21/2008 7:22:26 AM PST
by
rottndog
(If the Left obeyed the 10th Commandment, maybe they would learn to obey the 10th Amendment.)
To: rottndog
LOL!
Well, you have my permission to enjoy that pot and the coffee it brews for as long as it lasts!
1,850
posted on
02/21/2008 7:31:41 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(It's not the load that breaks you down but the way you carry it.)
To: Monkey Face
Will do.
4 minutes to snipe...
1,851
posted on
02/21/2008 7:37:14 AM PST
by
rottndog
(If the Left obeyed the 10th Commandment, maybe they would learn to obey the 10th Amendment.)
To: rottndog
1,852
posted on
02/21/2008 7:39:43 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(It's not the load that breaks you down but the way you carry it.)
To: Monkey Face
1,853
posted on
02/21/2008 7:42:50 AM PST
by
rottndog
(If the Left obeyed the 10th Commandment, maybe they would learn to obey the 10th Amendment.)
To: rottndog
1,854
posted on
02/21/2008 7:44:44 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(It's not the load that breaks you down but the way you carry it.)
To: Monkey Face
Live by the snipe, die by the snipe...
Gotta git...See Ya!
1,855
posted on
02/21/2008 7:50:00 AM PST
by
rottndog
(If the Left obeyed the 10th Commandment, maybe they would learn to obey the 10th Amendment.)
To: rottndog
1,856
posted on
02/21/2008 7:51:16 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(It's not the load that breaks you down but the way you carry it.)
To: Monkey Face
It’s later.
Had to go to Carson to pick up a battery this morning. I’m reminded how I hate many LA drivers.
1,857
posted on
02/21/2008 11:52:25 AM PST
by
rottndog
(If the Left obeyed the 10th Commandment, maybe they would learn to obey the 10th Amendment.)
To: rottndog
Ohyah!
I hated the 405. The 10 was almost as bad.
1,858
posted on
02/21/2008 1:05:44 PM PST
by
Monkey Face
(It's not the load that breaks you down but the way you carry it.)
To: Monkey Face
Survived Girl Scouts! We have lots of baba-ganoush and pita bread left over from the Egypt display, and some of the cactus salad from Mexico, which Anoreth is going to run through the food processor and turn it into salsa de nopalitos.
With that and some cauliflower and cheese sauce, we have tomorrow’s supper!
1,859
posted on
02/21/2008 1:59:35 PM PST
by
Tax-chick
(If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't shoot! It might be a lemur!)
To: Tax-chick
Wow! What a clever family you have!
I seldom cook. Unless I have company. Which isn’t often, and I still have leftovers.
1,860
posted on
02/21/2008 3:07:39 PM PST
by
Monkey Face
(It's not the load that breaks you down but the way you carry it.)
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