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Zombie attacks might increase due to global warming, study shows
http://wmbriggs.com/blog/2008/01/31/zombie-attacks-might-increase-due-to-global-warming-study-shows/ ^ | William M Briggs

Posted on 01/31/2008 3:36:33 PM PST by mattstat

A new study by scientists has suggested that zombie attacks might increase if the current projections of global warming are realized. “If the earth gets warmer, it means longer springs, summers, and falls, and shorter winters,” said John Carpenter-Romero, Ph.D., a zombie-ologist who co-authored the study. “And shorter winters means more time for the undead to prey on the populace.”

Dr. Harrister, the other co-author, and head of Zombie Robotics at Wayward Robot, Inc., explained that cold winters typically stalled the walking dead. “It is well known that zombies can’t operate in cold weather. It freezes their brains.”

The pair calculated a 32.782412% increase in zombie attacks if CO2 increased to twice its pre-industrial rate. “Clearly, this is a very troubling result,” said Dr. Harrister, “If we don’t do something soon, the streets will be filled with blood.”


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: allyourzotrbelong2us; callingartbell; globalwarming; molassesmiasma; monkeyfacerules; undead; undeadthread; zombies; zotemifyougotem
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To: Monkey Face

Uh-oh. Put them up higher!


1,361 posted on 02/13/2008 7:05:44 AM PST by Tax-chick ("Good guy wins, bad guy gets dead. Nothing to cry over here." ~ trimom)
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To: Tax-chick

I’ll have to put them where I can’t see them, I’m afraid, as my desk is so small.

But it’s all good! I’ll get a “Thank You” card off to them today, so they will know how much I appreciate their thoughtfulness.


1,362 posted on 02/13/2008 7:08:33 AM PST by Monkey Face (Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
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To: Monkey Face; Dead Corpse; Tax-chick; sionnsar; NicknamedBob; darkangel82

Good Morning!

55 and foggy here.


1,363 posted on 02/13/2008 8:20:43 AM PST by rottndog (This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
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To: rottndog

51 and soon to be windy as all get out.
How was your mission, yesterday?


1,364 posted on 02/13/2008 8:22:12 AM PST by Monkey Face (Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
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To: rottndog

Morning....


1,365 posted on 02/13/2008 8:22:35 AM PST by darkangel82 (If you're not part of the solution, you are part of the problem. (Say no to RINOs))
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To: Monkey Face

He was a Korean War Era vet. We outnumbered the family 2-1, but that’s why we do these things. Was a good day yesterday.


1,366 posted on 02/13/2008 8:37:13 AM PST by rottndog (This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
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To: darkangel82; Monkey Face

Time to saddle up and head for the cow patties...

See Ya!


1,367 posted on 02/13/2008 8:38:02 AM PST by rottndog (This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
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To: rottndog

A Vet is a Vet. They deserve a final honor!
Thanks for all you do!

*HUG*


1,368 posted on 02/13/2008 8:41:30 AM PST by Monkey Face (Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
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To: Monkey Face

Yep...we don’t discriminate.

Back in the cow patties again...


1,369 posted on 02/13/2008 9:44:22 AM PST by rottndog (This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
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I am SUCH a thread killer...
1,370 posted on 02/13/2008 1:27:33 PM PST by rottndog (This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
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To: rottndog

..and the sky eyes blinked and screeked their way across the peculiar sky, floating in their disgusting manner in the molasses air.
Their tentacle appendages trailing along as if an afterthought of utility...


1,371 posted on 02/13/2008 1:38:16 PM PST by Darksheare (Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
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To: Darksheare

Attack Of The Killer Clouds?


1,372 posted on 02/13/2008 1:40:39 PM PST by rottndog (This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
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To: rottndog

The all night bean-a-thon.


1,373 posted on 02/13/2008 1:41:18 PM PST by Darksheare (Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
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To: rottndog

Received a FReepmail from an imposter troll..
Imposter troll last posted in 2006.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/user-posts?id=248925

Their FReepmail?
Said “Whaaaaaaat?”

Seems it too them since 2006 to fail to comprehend what was said to them.


1,374 posted on 02/13/2008 1:48:05 PM PST by Darksheare (Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
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To: Darksheare

1,375 posted on 02/13/2008 1:53:39 PM PST by darkangel82 (If you're not part of the solution, you are part of the problem. (Say no to RINOs))
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To: darkangel82

Bean apocalypse!


1,376 posted on 02/13/2008 1:55:03 PM PST by Darksheare (Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
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To: NicknamedBob
Found a song that may be useful for one or two of my odd short stories.

Tarja Turunen - Damned & Divine

It won’t help if you wait for me.
I’m a slave to the dark.
I Know I’m not a saint, you see.
The Dawn is when it starts.
Feel the shadow of my oblivion hoping mercy would show her face
on the road to your own perdition in the coal-blackened rain.

Frozen in time yearning forbidden wishes.
Damned and divine.
Scars of my broken kisses.
What will follow if tomorrow’s blind?
My eternal night.

As the wind takes me away from you before the morning light.
My sins are fading into view I’m so weary deep inside
Feel the shadow of my oblivion hoping mercy would show her face
on the road to your own perdition I may see you again.

Frozen in time yearning forbidden wishes.
Damned and divine.
Scars of my broken kisses.
What will follow if tomorrow’s blind?
My eternal night.
Every single dawn I die again.

1,377 posted on 02/13/2008 2:59:08 PM PST by Darksheare (Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
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To: Darksheare; rottndog; Tax-chick; Dead Corpse; All

Well.
Goodness.
Badness.
And everything in between.
That’s a strange song. But somehow, it fits you...*snork*

Too bad there’s nothing in there about giant staples... ;o])


1,378 posted on 02/13/2008 3:12:00 PM PST by Monkey Face (Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
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To: Monkey Face; rottndog; Tax-chick; Dead Corpse; callisto

LOL.
Thanks.
Quite a bit of Tarja’s work from that album ‘fits’ stories or sketches.
(Can anyone tell that I listen to music while I write or sketch..?)


1,379 posted on 02/13/2008 3:15:09 PM PST by Darksheare (Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
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To: Darksheare

I have not heard any of Tarja’s music after she left Nightwish but I am bookmarking that video for later.


1,380 posted on 02/13/2008 3:16:40 PM PST by darkangel82 (If you're not part of the solution, you are part of the problem. (Say no to RINOs))
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