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Zombie attacks might increase due to global warming, study shows
http://wmbriggs.com/blog/2008/01/31/zombie-attacks-might-increase-due-to-global-warming-study-shows/ ^
| William M Briggs
Posted on 01/31/2008 3:36:33 PM PST by mattstat
A new study by scientists has suggested that zombie attacks might increase if the current projections of global warming are realized. “If the earth gets warmer, it means longer springs, summers, and falls, and shorter winters,” said John Carpenter-Romero, Ph.D., a zombie-ologist who co-authored the study. “And shorter winters means more time for the undead to prey on the populace.”
Dr. Harrister, the other co-author, and head of Zombie Robotics at Wayward Robot, Inc., explained that cold winters typically stalled the walking dead. “It is well known that zombies can’t operate in cold weather. It freezes their brains.”
The pair calculated a 32.782412% increase in zombie attacks if CO2 increased to twice its pre-industrial rate. “Clearly, this is a very troubling result,” said Dr. Harrister, “If we don’t do something soon, the streets will be filled with blood.”
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: allyourzotrbelong2us; callingartbell; globalwarming; molassesmiasma; monkeyfacerules; undead; undeadthread; zombies; zotemifyougotem
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To: Monkey Face
Pizza lunch! I hope you feel better soon.
1,281
posted on
02/12/2008 7:57:14 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
("Good guy wins, bad guy gets dead. Nothing to cry over here." ~ trimom)
To: Tax-chick
Thanks! Pizza would be excellent! Mmmmm!
1,282
posted on
02/12/2008 7:59:51 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(A fool can ask more questions than a wise man can answer.)
To: Monkey Face; Tax-chick; NicknamedBob; sionnsar; darkangel82; Dead Corpse
Good Morning!
Sun’s out, clouds are not, and the atomic clock says 50 degrees outside. No need for chaps this morning, although I will need them for the ride home tonight.
1,283
posted on
02/12/2008 8:12:46 AM PST
by
rottndog
(This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
To: rottndog
55....no clouds. Yet.
Drinking hot cocoa.
1,284
posted on
02/12/2008 8:41:31 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
To: Monkey Face
Already had my coffee...all juiced up and ready to go.
I have a mission out at RNC this morning. Just came up last night. I have enough time to get to work, shuffle some papers, and head out for the service.
Gotta go...See Ya!
1,285
posted on
02/12/2008 8:49:36 AM PST
by
rottndog
(This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
To: rottndog
1,286
posted on
02/12/2008 8:53:15 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
To: Monkey Face
47, sun, and dragging bigtime.
1,287
posted on
02/12/2008 9:35:05 AM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: sionnsar
I’ll bet you are!
How long will you be gone, this time? (I forget...)
1,288
posted on
02/12/2008 9:38:20 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
To: Monkey Face
Yah, I was up late writing a number of legislators trying to kill a couple of bills, then up early because I didn’t remember what time a teleconference was and I had to finish packing. I’ll be gone 10-11 days.
1,289
posted on
02/12/2008 9:43:22 AM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: sionnsar
Ouch.
Maybe you can nap on the flights?
1,290
posted on
02/12/2008 9:46:44 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
To: Monkey Face
Usually I can’t but I hope I can this time, or I’m really going to be in bad shape. First flight is about 10 hours, arriving in Paris about 8 AM.
1,291
posted on
02/12/2008 9:49:38 AM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: sionnsar
Oi. I’d take some benedryl with me, and make sure I napped!
1,292
posted on
02/12/2008 9:52:09 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
To: Monkey Face
Probably no problem... but did almost forget to put the MP3 player on the charger...
1,293
posted on
02/12/2008 10:03:35 AM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: sionnsar
Yoiks!
Can’t forget that!
1,294
posted on
02/12/2008 10:05:19 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
To: Monkey Face
Ok ... Τωρα αυτο ειναι σχεδον παρα πολυ διασκεδαστικο.
Foxlingo. Online translation software for Firefox.
w00t!
1,295
posted on
02/12/2008 10:10:56 AM PST
by
Dead Corpse
(What would a free man do?)
To: Dead Corpse
1,296
posted on
02/12/2008 10:12:30 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
To: Monkey Face
Eh... not just Greek either.
Она также делает русский.
1,297
posted on
02/12/2008 10:16:23 AM PST
by
Dead Corpse
(What would a free man do?)
To: Monkey Face
With my luck, I'm posting an online translation version of
Engrish.
1,298
posted on
02/12/2008 10:17:19 AM PST
by
Dead Corpse
(What would a free man do?)
To: Dead Corpse
Yoiks! Cyrillic! I’m impressed!
But can you dance?
1,299
posted on
02/12/2008 10:18:15 AM PST
by
Monkey Face
(Many minds should be closed for repairs.)
To: Monkey Face
Ho sempre voluto imparare a ballare sala da ballo.
1,300
posted on
02/12/2008 10:24:58 AM PST
by
Dead Corpse
(What would a free man do?)
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