Posted on 07/31/2005 1:19:25 PM PDT by KMB
Lucky you. 2-1/2 teleconference this morning, and another coming up this afternoon. My brain aches. *\:-(
When did we get moved to "Bloggers & Personal"?
howdy, Dr. Vixen
Well I was spending the day trying to keep peace in the office.
Yes, I know I feed off the chaos and general nastiness but my boss was hiding under my desk and I had no place to put my feet.
Why are some men such wimps when it comes to dealing with gangs of bitchy females?
How are you doing, sionnsar?
;-)
How are you doing KP?
Teleconferences more than an hour long should be illegal.
Thank goodness for a private office with speakerphone and a mute button.
Weird, isn't it? When I was a young sergeant I had the unpleasant chore of counseling all of our wayward females. I asked the sergeant major why he didn't do it, and his reply was, "Because they're girls! And since you're one too..."
It started out well when I cleared all the pressing items off my plate Monday... but it went really downhill after.
How about you?
I'm doing fine. The summer semester is officially over with now.
not too shabby. you?
Unfortunately in this week's TCs I'm the technical expert being conferring with so the mute button doesn't get used.
3 minutes until the next... sigh...
I'm doing fine.
Bummer. I can usually make it nearly all the way through ours without having to speak.
Q. Am I more likely to get pregnant if my husband wears boxers rather than briefs?
A. Yes, but you'll have an even better chance if he doesn't wear anything at all.
**
Q. What is the easiest way to figure out exactly when I got pregnant?
A. Have sex once a year.
**
Q. What is the most common pregnancy craving?
A. For men to be the ones who get pregnant.
**
Q. I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A. With any luck, right after he finishes college.
**
Q. Ever since I've been pregnant, I haven't been able to go to bed at night without onion rings. Is this a normal craving?
A. Depends on what you're doing with them.
***
Q. The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why?
A. Cause you're fatter then they are.
**
Q. My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A. So what's your question, dork?
**
Q. Will I love my dog less when the baby is born?
A. No, but your husband might get on your nerves.
**
Q. My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A. Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.
**
Q. Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A. Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.
**
Q. Is there a safe alternative to breast pumps?
A. Yes, baby lips.
**
Q. Can a mother get pregnant while nursing?
A. Yes, but it's much easier if she removes the baby from her breast and puts him to sleep first.
**
Q. What causes baby blues?
A. Tanned, hard-bodied bimbos.
LOL.. That is just about what he said to me.
Condense version of today's counseling. "Yes we are all over worked and under paid and I would rather be at the beach too but the next person who calls their co-worker a b*tch is going to be unemployed. Oh and logs are being kept of all IM messages."
"Now sit down, shut up and get to work so we can all go home."
I swear if they don't stop it I am going to take their IM capacity or fire the problem group. Maybe both.
LOL! That should quiet the place down.
I have been watching the logs for five months now. You would not believe some of the stuff I have read.
I can only imagine.
There is one gossip on my floor, and I avoid saying anything in front of her that I wouldn't want to see on a billboard.
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