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DUmmie FUnnies 05-30-05 ("What do you love?" ---Pitt Posts "Trype" And Conspires With Scamdy)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | May 30, 2005 | William Rivers Pitt, DUmmies, and PJ-Comix

Posted on 05/30/2005 8:21:59 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

Pied Piper Pitt has once again consulted his ever-ready thesaurus in preparation for this paean to himself posted in DUmmieland. The most interesting thing about this DUmmie THREAD titled, “What do you love?” isn’t Pitt’s tedious and overlong self-glorification but his interaction with co-conspirator Scamdy. So let us now view Pied Piper Pitt telling us how wonderful he is in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, who will be asking the judge at the Scamdy trial to permit a large screen monitor with an internet connection at the Scamdy trial so as to allow the jury a better view of the vital evidence contained in the DUFUs, is in the [brackets]:

What do you love?

[I love following this whole Scamdy Scandal and you, Pitt, provide among the best entertainment of all the co-conspirators.]

I love my mom. She had me when she was 26 and then watched her marriage fly apart for reasons I have no place to judge.

[Perhaps the breakup was caused by your mom blaming your Dad for the way you turned out. But continue with the sob story, Pitt…]

She went to school with a young boy on her hip and became one of the best in her business, all the while with the whip-hand raised to make sure her son was worth the world he was to live in. She lives today, paintbrush in hand and canvas at the fore, at the end of five miles of dirt road in New Hampshire in a small log cabin by a lake. She is the strongest, smartest, wisest, funniest and best person I will ever know.

[Your mom paints? Great. If cameras are not allowed in the courtroom at the Scamdy trial perhaps she could be the courtroom sketch artist. Please tell your mom to make sure that she sketches Scamdy as healthily plump as the day he arrived at Johns Hopkins.]

I love my dad. He was born out of red North Alabama clay to love FDR and the Tennessee Valley Authority, and met my mom just before he volunteered for Vietnam duty in 1969.

[Uh-Oh! We seem to have a veracity problem here, Pitt. If your Dad was young enough in 1969 to volunteer for Vietnam then why would he be reminiscing about FDR and the TVA? That love for the TVA is mainly something that folks who grew up in the DEPRESSION would do. Somebody who is a Baby Boomer (or even a just few years older than that) wouldn’t be expressing love for the TVA any more than someone born in, say, 1930 would be expressing his love for the Panama Canal because it was a bit BEFORE his time.]

Yes, volunteered. He watched his marriage fly apart for reasons I have no place to judge, and embarked upon a 40-year oddessy of public service that took him from the Secretary of State's office to the Attorney General's office to the US. Attorney's office - all in Alabama, where Democrats are awfully popular, you know - and only in the last couple of years did he figure out that you can actually make money as a lawyer in private practice. He is the strongest, smartest, wisest, funniest and best person I will ever know.

[Hopefully your Dad is not an ambulance chaser like a certain recent vice-presidential candidate.]

I love my city. Boston, cold, rainy, hot, sunny, bitter and snowy altogether, with a confluence of 400 years of history marking the cracked streets.

[You left out humid, windy, and foggy in your Boston weather report, Pitt. However, I am happy to see that you consulted your ever-present thesaurus in time to come up with “confluence.”]

We started slavery and ended it - the slave trade came from here, 'Boston Baked Beans' were slave food for generations, and yet The Liberator was printed here, the Union Clubs were started here, and the spine of Union strength during the Civil War was found here. Never mind the Guns of Ticonderoga and the lashing of the British. That's just the fun stuff. Boston is America: Every race, and every racism, dirty and clean together, a port city at once looking ahead and anchored to the past, with all the weather of the country pouring out along the jet stream and across the Cape. Don't like it? Wait five minutes. Oh, and the Sox. And the Pats.

[I’m impressed with your interjection of history on the heels of your Boston weather report. Can I just kiss your tuchus right now, Pitt, or do I have to wait for that privilege?]

I love my country. We made the slaves, and freed them. We slaughtered the natives, and carved out a space for millions of others to find freedom from their own lands, opressions, tortures. We stand for freedom and sell it out every day. We stand for profit, we exude the excess of victorious capitalism from every pore, we are governed by an avarice and a body-lust that has nothing to do with the soul or the spirit, and yet, with a million billion kindnesses done on streetcorners and church pews and protest rallies and God knows exactly where else, we show with every breath that profit and money and wealth are not a reason to breathe in and breathe out.

[Boston weather report: A long hot wind coming from the direction of a certain Pied Piper Pitt.]

No propaganda can paint over the blood and horror and woe we have created. No propaganda can obscure the greatness of the ideal - Of the People, By the People, For the People - nor can any propaganda obscure the greatness of our accomplishments. We have done great things, and terrible things.

[No appeals can get Pied Piper Pitt to keep from bloviating. No plea for mercy Of the People, By the People, For the People can make him cease his hot air attack.]

We are guilty, and we are innocent. We have done great things, and boy o boy, we have a lot of cleaning up to do.

[You are guilty of being Scamdy’s chief cheerleader on the Web and you are innocent of having the slightest lick of common sense. And boy o boy, you have a lot of cleaning up of the Scamdy “documents” on your hard drive to do.]

What do you love? What do you fight for?

[I love reading your rationalizations about how Scamdy really really does have pancreatic cancer and I will fight to get a front row seat in the courtroom at Scamdy’s scandal trial.]

Do you fight for an ideal, a promise at the end of your struggle? Or is the fight itself so much a habit now that you have forgotten what it is that got you started in the first place? Sometimes I forget. Sometimes I lose myself in the warring between party, between ideology, hell, sometimes in the warring within forums here.

[Sometimes you forget that self-glorifying paeans actually do have to END at some point, Pitt.]

But then I remember.

[Please remember to someday terminate this tribute to yourself.]

I'm an American. My family came over her on boats from Ireland, England and Germany. My family farmed, went to school, busted their humps to make sure their kids did better than they did. This is a lot of what we are missing these days, that idea of sacrifice, that immigrant ethic: You aren't in this for you, but for your kids, for the future.

[It’s bad enough that we have to hear you tell us how wonderful you are, Pitt, but now you are torturing us with what great folks your long forgotten ancestors were.]

Once we lost that, once instant gratification became the state religion, then easy gas and easy steel and easy labor and easy war and easy death became, well, easy, and we forgot that there is a price to be paid in the end.

[Why don’t you take it EASY, Pitt, and quit with the (inevitable) segue into politicization of everything?]

Everyone is born owing a death. Every man, every woman, every nation, every empire. To think this escapable is to laugh in God's face, and God is not mocked.

[Actually God is pissed that you are invoking His name in your never ending spiel.]

I'm an American. I am proud of my nation and ashamed of it. I am proud of the ideals of our institutions of government, and ashamed at how easily they are corrupted by money, by that instant gratification desire which mouths platitudes of patriotism while spitting on the nation entire.

[Speaking of being corrupted by money…How is Scamdy doing since his “miraculous” recovery from his pancreatic cancer operation?]

Somewhere in history, I'm pretty sure my family owned slaves. Somewhere in there, I know for a stone fact my family fought to free them. I'm an American, so I'm conflicted. That's how it is.

[Doesn’t matter if your family freed their slaves. You still gotta come up with the reparations payments. BTW, my family only ran whores in Chicago so I don’t have to make those reparations payments.]

But I know we can do better than this. I know we will. I am a profound believer in what-goes-around-comes-around, with the caveat that nothing will come around without some shoulders to the wheel.

[I too am a profound believer in what-goes-around-comes-around and since you were the chief Scamdy cheerleader it will all come around in a courtroom at his fraud trial.]

I love my mom, I love my dad, I love my country, and I hate it, too. I love the fact that I can sit here and say whatever the hell I want, trype it out and push a button and make my nonsense the fodder for hudreds or thousands or millions. That's freedom. That's raw democracy. But I wish I could say only good things about my country, my people, our history, or legacy. That would be nice.

[“Trype it out.” A Freudian slip that is ever so TRUTHFUL.]

What do you love? What do you fight for? What would you die for?

[I would DIE for you to finish trying to “trype it out.”]

This is Memorial Day Weekend. Better men than I am or ever will be marched off to fight and die for the best ideals this nation has to offer. This weekend, millions of assholes will stuff themselves into cars and ram down Routh 3 to the Sagamore Bridge for a hoped-for weekend of sunshine on cold Cape Cod beaches. Why? Because they got an extra day off. Sure, they'll maybe get choked up during the ballgame when the extra-special 'God Bless America' gets sung, but hell, Normandy was more than 60 years ago, and sure, Dad fought in Vietnam though he doesn't like to talk about it, and sure, the sister-in-law of the neighbors who moved last year might have had a son who was supposed to get shipped off to Iraq...what was his name?

[Meanwhile Pitt is trying to feed us the “trype” that he is so wonderful because he is sitting in his hole in the wall this weekend instead of going to the beach.]

Do we even remember what we stand for anymore?

[Do you even remember that all essays, even ones that are self-glorifying “trype, have to reach a conclusion?]

When was it that we were last a people governed by something besides ease, or the desire for ease; money, or the desire for money; fear, or the desire to kill what it is we fear? Have we ever been anything other than people motivated by base instincts? Of course. Can we be more than that? Of course.

[And of course your buddy, Scamdy, is not motivated by money, especially that $50,000+ that he scammed with your aid for a non-existent pancreatic cancer operation.]

What do you love? What do you fight for? What would you die for?

[What would you give for Pitt to terminate his repetitive “trype?”]

Those questions need to be asked and answered, and quickly.

[WHEW! FINALLY you finished your “trype,” Pitt. And speaking of questions that need to be asked and answered quickly: Why won’t you post on the web the documentation about Scamdy’s diagnosis and bill for pancreatic cancer that you claim to have on your hard drive?]

Well, I read all that and I thought, damn, that person really knows how to write.

[I agree. Pitt really knows how to “trype it out.”]

What an awesome article ,,,,, It is one of those that will stay in my thoughts for days,,,, haunting, paradoxical, bittersweet…

[…tedious, narcissistic, self-important, laughable, “trype”…

I love that I am alive. Life is good!

[It sure is Scamdy! Don’t you just love the fact that you so easily bilked the DUmmies thanx to the aid of Pied Piper Pitt cheering you on from the sidelines? Yup. Life is good!]

Get off the internet. I am so totally serious. There are some amazing vampires running around lately, and you don't need to bother with it. Get off, go rest, or I will break your f*cking arms. I swear to God, Andy. Oh, P.S., hi. No go rest.

[Better listen to Pied Piper Pitt, Scamdy. Anything you post in DUmmieland is copied into the DUmmie FUnnies and can and WILL be used against you in a court of law. Please get off the internet, Scamdy, so as to not post things incriminating to Pitt. If Pitt is convicted due to your postings, he will break your f*cking arms.]

Yes sir. Oh and BTW callme...I want to talk to you!

[Good suggestion, Scamdy. You and Pitt need to chat offline and piece together a cover story that might hold up in court.]

I will. If you post again, I smash you.

[I will call you up, Scamdy, to devise a good cover story. However, if you post any more incriminating stuff on the web, I smash you.]

HI Andy. Glad to see you up and at em.

[Hi Andy! Glad to see you up and at them with your miraculous recuperation from pancreatic cancer surgery. Oh, could you give me a phone call from your ICU and maybe we could do some AIM chat on the ICU computer?]

Heeee...I adore both of you boys...now play nice or I'll bang your heads together.

[I adore both those co-conspirators.]

I love everyone with the wisdom to question what is widely accepted.

[Unfortuately, DUmmie LaraMN, if you question the widely accepted “fact” in DUmmieland that Scamdy had pancreatic cancer surgery, you will be tombstoned.]

I love collaboration and the power engendered by that simple gesture.

[That’s true, DUmmie sfexpat2000. We know you love collaborating with Scamdy in his $$$ scam.]

I love a pure heart. Nobody has one, but we can try to attain it.

[How about Scamdy? Doesn’t he have a pure heart?]

I love my kittyboy who is dying of cancer, he will be going to heaven very soon...... This is my first pet that I have to put down, pure devastation

[Does your cat have pancreatic cancer? If so, then don’t post that fact in DUmmieland. The words “pancreatic cancer” are TABOO there.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: andyscam; andystephenson; dummies; trype; williampitt
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To: franksolich
You really have to send one to Bev, just to make sure they can deliver the things to the right person on the right day at the right address.

Don't forget to give her our regards.

341 posted on 05/30/2005 9:09:43 PM PDT by CAluvdubya (Let's exercise the "Byrd" option!)
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To: beandog
They just didn't care.
 
Oh, no doubt about that, but no nurse worth her salt would let it happen in ICU, no way no how. I have been in too many of those damn places to think he could get away with it in ICU. Those nurses must go to boot camp and get lessons from Marine drill sgts.

342 posted on 05/30/2005 9:11:12 PM PDT by Allosaurs_r_us (for a fee........I'm happy to be........Your BACKDOOR MAN!....Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap!)
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To: CaliGirl-R

He argues so pathetically. It was kind of fun. It was more fun when he said he was pushing our buttons and we're over her laughing!


343 posted on 05/30/2005 9:11:45 PM PDT by CAluvdubya (Let's exercise the "Byrd" option!)
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To: Allosaurs_r_us

Maybe DUmmie Liberal Nurse was running interference. I understand she's quite the "lady". LOL


344 posted on 05/30/2005 9:14:01 PM PDT by beandog (The only time I was wrong was the time I thought I was wrong)
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To: Allosaurs_r_us

Bravo, I concur. No nurse would allow this, nor would a patient be cognizant enough to handle talking much less singing "If I Were A Rich Man".


345 posted on 05/30/2005 9:15:41 PM PDT by CAluvdubya (Let's exercise the "Byrd" option!)
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To: beandog

DUmmie Liberalnurse=Nurse Ratchet!


346 posted on 05/30/2005 9:16:42 PM PDT by CAluvdubya (Let's exercise the "Byrd" option!)
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To: beandog
I understand she's quite the "lady"
 
Heh, heh........that's a HOT one. She's a real piece a work, that one is!

347 posted on 05/30/2005 9:19:01 PM PDT by Allosaurs_r_us (for a fee........I'm happy to be........Your BACKDOOR MAN!....Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap!)
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To: CAluvdubya

She sure has a mouth on her.


348 posted on 05/30/2005 9:19:45 PM PDT by beandog (The only time I was wrong was the time I thought I was wrong)
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To: franksolich

Hey, franksolich,

Your sentiments are adorable, but I will be on a plane Thursday and in Cleveland Friday and Saturday. Thus the lovely flowers might wilt.

But thanks for the concept.

Bev


349 posted on 05/30/2005 9:25:15 PM PDT by BevHarris
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To: franksolich
I thought they were yacking about your telegram on one of their threads...they were trying to see if they could get us for harrassment or something. You know how they are about suing, or at least threatening. Wouldn't be surprised to find the McDonald's coffee lady on DU...I mean why would anyone expect coffee to actually be HOT!

Cindie

350 posted on 05/30/2005 9:25:29 PM PDT by gardencatz (A brass unicorn...has...catapulted across a...street and impaled an eminent surgeon. Words fail me!)
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To: SCALEMAN

bookmark


351 posted on 05/30/2005 9:26:03 PM PDT by SCALEMAN (Super Cards/Rams Fan)
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To: PJ-Comix

Billy Pitt is a pretentious asshole.

His writing sucks. ANYONE who calls millions of ordinary working Americans "assholes" simply because they choose to have a barbecue or go to the beach on Memorial Day is a gold plated condescending f*#ktard.

He will never understand that people who disagree with him politically are not motivated by evil. They are simply right, and he is bloody wrong, about the greatest and most existential issue of our time-the war against Islamic Fascism.

People like Pitt are, at bottom, craven and weak. They fear the Islamists. The Jihadi know this, and hold leftists like Pitt in utter contempt. Lefties like Pitt and Scamdy turn their fear of the Islamists into hatred for the figure they know, Bush. They can't do anything about the Jihadi, so they hate Bush, the figure they can do something about.

You have to understand that someone like Pitt would be the first person to show the SS where the Jews were being hidden. That's the key to understanding why liberals are so weak. They are utterly and completely useless in the war on terror. People like Pitt hate Bush far more than they hate Bin Laden precisely because they are so scared of Bin Laden! The liberals hate Bush because they fear. Fear is all the liberals have left.

But George Bush is not afraid of the terrorists, and that makes people like Pitt hate him even more.

Remember the facade of national unity that existed after 9/11? There are those of us who knew it wouldn't last. We knew the Democrats. Their party has a glass jaw. They cannot take casualties. The jihadists know this and are counting on the weakness within that party to undermine our ability to survive as a people. Oh, they talk tough. Why, at the Democratic National Convention last year there were more generals up on that dais then in the last six Bolivian States of Siege. I almost expected John Kerry to dig up poor old Hugo Banzer and declare a coup! Once the number of dead rose above 500, the antiwar group among the Democrats took over the party and started calling Bush a liar. Bin Laden himself couldn't have written a better script, and it went exactly as he told his subordinates it would.

Bin Laden understood how morally soft and corrupt the Left was in Europe. They were easy prey for the Islamic Fascist movement. He was banking on the proposition that the Left in America was just as craven and corrupt.

He was right-in spades. They are not even willing to fight fascism, finding their own President to be far more evil than the mass murders from whom he is trying to save. Both bin Laden and Hussein's hands drip in blood; but that matters little to Pitt and other leftists. Bush is a Republican, therefore he is evil.

Were Bush a Democrat, Pitt would be supporting this war. So would Pitt's friends. So would DemocraticUnderground. Understand that they have no guiding principles in that party. They are craven, weak, and unprincipled.

I have two feelings concerning William Rivers ("Billy") Pitt: contempt, and slight regard.

Be Seeing You,

Chris

352 posted on 05/30/2005 9:26:28 PM PDT by section9 (Major Motoko Kusanagi says, "Jesus is Coming. Everybody look busy...")
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To: dynoman; Dr.Hilarious; PJ-Comix
We started slavery and ended it - the slave trade came from here

Apparently, he never saw Spartacus!!!

DOH!

353 posted on 05/30/2005 9:32:55 PM PDT by Dashing Dasher (Unthinkably good things can happen, even late in the game.)
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To: I_like_good_things_too
My last search for the night turned up the logo that is used on the second document appearing to be in the letterhead.

Anyone can copy, paste and crop it. The rest is mere formatting. Looks exact to me..

Do a side by side thing and see for yourself.

354 posted on 05/30/2005 9:36:23 PM PDT by repinwi
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To: NEPA

What the address of the FR Yahoo site?


355 posted on 05/30/2005 9:39:35 PM PDT by Proud 2BeTexan
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To: Proud 2BeTexan

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/du_alert/


356 posted on 05/30/2005 9:56:23 PM PDT by CaliGirl-R
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To: ReeWalker
Try this (scaled down, but you can make larger): The Documents - Been There, Done That…The check is in the mail. Feel free to download a copy, etc. I believe if you put your mouse over it, you'll have the option to make it bigger, at least my browser does that with pics.

Cindie

357 posted on 05/30/2005 10:03:28 PM PDT by gardencatz (A brass unicorn...has...catapulted across a...street and impaled an eminent surgeon. Words fail me!)
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To: PJ-Comix

PJ-Comix!!

 
 


358 posted on 05/30/2005 10:06:24 PM PDT by trussell (Prayers for the children!)
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To: CAluvdubya
Considering the way badboy spells "rediculous" one could almost assume the same person filled out the "John Hopkins" form.

I'm just getting caught up, so someone may have replaced the origtinal image with what I see now, because I can't find where Johns Hopkins is spelled as "John Hopkins" on the form. I do find it odd that the patient's name is nowhere on the form.

Does anyone know where at JH Miss Waverly works? Would she have access to blank forms?

359 posted on 05/30/2005 10:09:32 PM PDT by Misty Memory (The Grace Goodhue Coolidge of FR as designated by franksolich)
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To: commonguymd

I'm not sure (esp with the 2nd document) why it was dated 5/20 when the original surgery was supposedly scheduled 5/10. But as to some of the other questions....

the question of white out...many medical documents - especially the ones given to patients are carbonless copies. If someone has several different forms stacked on top of each other and writes on the top one, the gibberish will show up on the carbonless copy of the 2nd form. I see this every day. Or maybe white out was used.

Johns Hopkins spelling. I zoomed in on that ... I see J-o-h-squiggly line blurring into-s H-o-p-k-i-same squiggly line blurring into -s. Other interpretations may vary.


360 posted on 05/30/2005 10:09:59 PM PDT by not_apathetic_anymore
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