Posted on 11/03/2004 5:18:15 AM PST by PJ-Comix
This morning the Dummies have presented us a WEALTH of material. No need to do much searching on the DUmmie site for comedy material. One merely needs to cast his net in any direction to catch a wealth of hilarious DUmmie angst. So where to start? Hmm… I think we shall lead off this special DUmmie FUnnies Election Edition with this comedic THREAD about where Kerry went wrong. Oh, and don’t expect DUmmie loyalty for the Ketchup Boy to last long. Their recriminations are only beginning to roll in. As usual, the DUmmie anguish is in Bolshevik Red while the wry commentary of your humble correspondent is in the [brackets]:
Biggest mistake the Kerry Campaign made…
[…was not getting Lurch a new face. Oh, and another, breezier, personality wouldn’t have hurt either.]
He should of comtinued to remind people that 9/11 happened under Bush's watch. Should of said how can we be protected by him when he already proved he couldn't protect us.
[Should have said how Karl Rove operated those 9/11 planes by radio control.]
But once again. The Dems were too scared to attack on the hard subjects like this. So here we are.
[So here we are again. Defeated losers with the evil Bush Regime ruling us for another 4 years. But other than that, have you had a good day?]
Not today.....no posts about Kerry mistakes TODAY can't you wait a while, amigo?
[Killjoy!]
All it was about was the gays. This election was clearly decided upon cultural wedge issues.
[I agree…And did anyone ever tell you that you have a nice tush?]
this election was decide by rove, Stop pretending this was legitimate
[Correct. And it was very stuffy in my voting booth with Rove in there with me deciding my vote.]
It was about Jesus and stem cell and abortion and the pledge of allegiance and on and on and on. This is turning into a theocracy.
[Our Karl Who Art in Heaven,
Rove be thy name.]
I agree. He should have said it in the debates. Should have said something like this: "I know you care about about national security, Mr. President, Afterall history is going to record that that 9-11 happened on your watch. And no President would want to have to deal with two such incidents but...."
[He should have said in the debates something like this: “Mr. President, you have a nice tush.”]
Kerry's biggest mistake was letting the Skank Boat Vets bitch slap him unchallenged through the month of August. Kerry's lead from the Democratic Convention evaporated and it was uphill from that point on.
[Thank you, Mary Beth Cahill! And your tickets to the Bush Inauguration party are in the mail.]
There were many other major mistakes like the "nice" convention, not going on the attack early, and even probably, in retrospect, picking Edwards, but there will be plenty of time for that once we officially lose. It's still unofficial for now.
[And picking a harridan for a wife probably wasn’t helpful either. Well time to relax for a while until we officially lose.]
Can it with the wimpering and smell the burning votes. Lower votes than expected from turnout seen on the ground. Exit poll variance ONLY in FL and OH.
[Strange smoke signals from Mt. Doom…Mysterious lights over Roswell…]
its the stupid holy rollers, stupid. stupid ppl outnumber us and most of them are religious. religion is evil and this election is proof. anyone that still believes in god(s) after this is a fool
[God is dead (unless Kerry can still win Ohio).]
we have no counterbalance to evangelicals. Republicans are piggybacking on these rapture freaks who think * is the second coming. They go to church to get brainwashed every week. Liberals have nothing to counter that, and it has been killing us.
[How about joining the Church of Shirley MacLaine? Wouldn’t that be a good counterbalance to the evangelicals?]
Here we go. It's let's stab John Kerry in the back time.
[A FUN and RELAXING game!!!]
Did you notice that about him? During the debates, he couldn't stand still firmly on both feet -- he kept shifting his body weight from one foot to the other, like he didn't want to be caught flatfooted and pinned down on anything. I thought it was a body "tell" for evasion, or rather for an impulse to evasiveness.
Did you see what I'm talking about? Nobody else mentioned it during the debate. At first I thought he was just setting himself, like some people do, when they turn toward someone to address them -- but he kept doing it, incessantly. A little dither-dance of evasiveness.
They closed access to trollers? Woof! There must be some serious trashing going on!
What a wonderful idea! Yes, we must at once! Better still, let's see if we can get someone like Andy Card to write the note for all of us!
;^D)
Even the DU group must be happy not to hear the Johns say "I have a plan" again.
That's okay, our spies will penetrate their Cone of Silence and reveal all!
please ping me when you have more! I love it!
""They go to church to get brainwashed every week. Liberals have nothing to counter that, and it has been killing us.""
Coming Soon: First the Moonies, now the Deanies!!! Will Howard Dean become their new CULT leader?? Sounds like yes, that's exactly what the rats need to win elections!
BTW, anyone wanna take bets on how long it will be before the "We shoulda picked Howard Dean" threads begin?
What a night. I guess the upside of Kerry being unable to accept his defeat is that we get to read more DUmmie FUnnies!
Thanks again PJ.
Once a DUmmie, always a DUmmie. :-)
You're not gloating. You are merely conscious of your own intellectual superiority and political savvy, and that gives you an inner glow.
PJ, thank you for taking to time to do these. This is great entertainment. you rock.
K4
Just think you may have to spin this off to your own blog with all the material you are going to have over the next four years.
He fluttered about an awful lot, and whenever asked for specifics on his 'plan', he stuttered, cleared his throat, muttered, delayed for a few seconds, and then pretty much never answered teh question but instead spoke about his talking points.
The mental image he gave me while watching him was of a butterfly lit up on crack.
Fluttering every which way but unsure of where to go.
Made me find him even MORE annoying than he already was.
Darn Christians. LOL!!!!
BTTT
As I stated a few times on these threads, I really would like to see the DUmmie FUnnies get into print in book form with LOTS of related comix stories and illustrations to accompany the text. That way the GENERAL PUBLIC will learn about the TRUE FACE of the Left.
Regarding the losers' remarks about religious nuts/holy rollers, shouldn't they say what they really mean and stress that they only hate practioners of the Christian faith? After all, when Muslim terrorists plow into buildings in planes or commit suicide bombings I don't recall Democrats ever expressing any disapproving remarks about "religious nuts." The only real hatred they can conjure up is toward their own fellow Americans who happen to be Republicans. Probably because they know we won't shoot or bomb them like Muslim terrorists would if they disagreed with them. Democrats are cowards on a cosmic scale.
I went through the transcript of the 3rd debate counting how many times each candidate said the word "God", "Lord", or "Almighty", but only counted once if used twice in the same sentence.
Results? Kerry 9 times, Bush 2 times.
Now, who's supposed to be the religious nutjob according to the libs?
PLEASE add me to your ping list!!! These are "hillary"ous!
N8VTXNinWV
Hysterical.. Please put me on your Ping List --- Thanks..
ping
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