Pheobe Debates The Theory of Evolution

Original scene from the show... Friends. ^ | NA | NA

[Mr.Atos]

I was just lisening to Medved debating Creationism with Athiests on the air. I found it interesting that while Medved argued his side quite effectively from the standpoint of faith, his opponents resorted to condescension and beliitled him with statements like, "when it rains, is that God crying?" I was reminded of the best (at least most amusing)debate that I have ever heard on the subject of Creationism vs Evolution, albeit a fictional setting. It occurred on the show, Friends of all places between the characters Pheobe (The Hippy) and Ross (The Paleontologist). It went like this...

Pheebs: Okay...it's very faint, but I can still sense him in the building...GO INTO THE LIGHT MR. HECKLES!!

Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, uh, you don't believe in evolution? Pheebs: Nah. Not really. Ross: You don't believe in evolution? Pheebs: I don't know. It's just, ya know, monkeys, Darwin, ya know, it's a, it's a nice story. I just think it's a little too easy.

Ross: Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. Evolution is scientific fact. Like, like, the air we breathe, like gravity... Pheebs: Uh, okay, don't get me started on gravity.

Ross: You uh, you don't believe in gravity? Pheebs: Well, it's not so much that ya know, like I don't *believe* in it, ya know. It's just...I don't know. Lately I get the feeling that I'm not so much being pulled down, as I am being pushed.

Ross: How can you NOT BELIEVE in evolution? Pheebs: [shrugs] I unh-huh...Look at this funky shirt!!

Ross: Well, there ya go. Pheebs: Huh. So now, the REAL question is: who put those fossils there, and why...?

Ross: OPPOSABLE THUMBS!! Without evolution, how do YOU explain OPPOSABLE THUMBS?!? Pheebs: Maybe the overlords needed them to steer their spacecrafts!

Pheebs: Uh-oh! Scary Scientist Man!

Pheebs: Okay, Ross? Could you just open your mind like, *this* much?? Okay? Now wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believed that the Earth was flat? And up until what, like, fifty years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing, until you split it open, and this like, whole mess o' crap came out! Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny, tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?!?

Pheebs: I can't believe you caved. Ross: What? Pheebs: You just ABANDONED your whole belief system! I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. Ross: But uh.. Pheebs: Yeah...how...how are you gonna go in to work tomorrow? How...how are you gonna face the other science guys? How...how are you gonna face yourself? Oh! [Ross runs away dejected] Pheebs: That was fun. So who's hungry?

[conservababeJen]

*gasp* (we agree...now I know how RWP feels )
I find that link just as disgusting as you do.

[VadeRetro]

IHS = Isis, Horus, and Seth, the gods of Egypt!

Yes! It's obvious now that Jack Chick points it out. (Of course, he seems to have forgotten Osiris, Amon Re, Bastet, Nut, Sobek, Aten, Tehuti, and a few dozen others.)

[Physicist]

I did like the 'check this box for eternal life' bit at the end, though.

Feh. I got "JavaScript Error: myImmortalSoul.rapture() method undefined". Time to update my browser.

[VadeRetro]

I can't believe there are people still writing this stuff. It's so Thirty Years War.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Whew!

[Doctor Stochastic]

It's too tempting:

The great god Ra whose shrine once covered acres
Is filler now for crossword-puzzle makers.
- Keith Preston (1884-1927)

[CobaltBlue]

As far as I know few Christians see "visions" when they take communion. The only one that comes to my mind is St. Theresa.

Communion and baptism are the only sacraments that Christians hold in common, and we can't all agree on exactly what they mean, it's true.

I can't speak for others but Catholics don't "munch the wafer", we don't touch it with out teeth, we let it dissolve on the roof of our mouths.

So, to Catholics, "munch the wafer" is rude.

[Junior]

bible literalists = people who believe what the Bible says is true as opposed to fiction.

Bible literalist = people who believe a literal rather than allegorical interpretation of some Scripture is correct despite the physical evidence to the contrary. It has nothing at all to do with the Bible being true or not.

I honestly despair of certain folks ever discerning nuance. Am I the only person who was ever taught critical reading and thinking in school?

[exmarine]

This childish crap is hardly worth my time or efforts anymore. I'm quite comfortable with my posts, and I'm secure in the knowledge that genesis is an old story written by men who had no knowledge of modern science.

Well, from one ranter to another, that was quite a rant. I would just point out that Genesis is not a science book, it's a history book and a book that reveals the character and identity of the Creator of time itself. The writer of Genesis did not write about science.

[headsonpikes]

"I did like the 'check this box for eternal life' bit at the end..."

It's part of the new Dispensation, usually accompanied by a 'check in the mail'.

[Physicist]

I find that link just as disgusting as you do.

A point in your favor. I suspect, however, that certain posters here would believe it to be right on the money (and well-written, too).

[js1138]

I would agree that posts that claim either than 'naturalism leads to (insert pet evil here)' or 'Christianity leads to (insert pet evil here)' might be ended by mutual agreement.

I think unilateral disarmament is called for her also.

Look, those of us who accept a naturalistic approach to truth finding are never going to agree to accept miracles as an explanation for everyday phenomena. That's a given. But there are debate tactics that are equivalent to shooting one's own foot, and attacking the character of opponents is one of those tactics. My foot is pretty sore. I think I'll stop for a while.

This is not an agreement. It is just a promise to myself. Like going on a diet. ;^)

[CobaltBlue]

If I call Genesis a silly superstition, is that abuse in your eyes?

It's not "abuse" to me, but it's unnecessarily rude.

I trust that you would not tell anybody to their face that their religion is a "silly superstition," regardless of your heartfelt beliefs.

[Junior]

That is horrifically offensive. Of course, we'll never see any of the creos on this thread distance himself from ol' Jack Chick, will we? That screed reflects the bigotry to which I was subjected growing up.

[VadeRetro]

So, to Catholics, "munch the wafer" is rude.

I probably did munch about one a year as a kid, a Methodist-in-training per my Dad's hopes. Nobody told me about that "let it dissolve" thing.

The tiny plastic vial of liquid was just grape juice.

[Lurking Libertarian]

Of course, we'll never see any of the creos on this thread distance himself from ol' Jack Chick, will we?

We've already seen one express her disgust for it.

[VadeRetro]

You surprise me here, c-J. I see you're a bit stunned, yourself.

While you're still stunned, one thing I do on these threads is voice my opposition to letting the Jack Chicks into science class.

[CobaltBlue]

Tunnel-vision is unnecessary, IMO.

Personally, I don't mind being "lumped" with anybody that I agree with more often than not. My guess is that Catholics agree with fundamentalists more than 50% of the time. For example, the fundamentalist position on abortion is far closer to the Catholic position than that of other Protestants.

If you take Vatican II seriously, I don't see the problem. We're supposed to be working together to the extent that we can, and disagreeing respectfully to the rest.

[js1138]

Actually it is well written. That's what makes it disgusting as opposed to merely silly.

[whattajoke]

For the record, this youthful Presbyterian (a compromise b/w my Methodist mother and baptist father) was weaned on stale Wonder bread cubes and grape juice as well. passed around the pews and inserted by our own hand--but only AFTER getting confirmed, which I was.

Aside: at a friend's catholic wedding some years ago, a jewish friend in our pew way too loudly stated, "do we get to eat a cracker? I'm hungry." To this day, he is chided for his insensitivity amongst friends.

[Junior]

Mea maxima culpa.