An event from 20 years ago, when he was 12, is not an excuse, reason, or anything else for this horrible man's actions. I grew up in a highly dysfunctional family and none of what my brother did in his adult years was justified by events from our childhood. We both grew up in the same circumstances and we both had to make our own choices. He chose not to change. I took the path less traveled by my family and that has made all the difference.
As of last month his choices brought him to meet his maker at the end of a cops' gun.
The only one responsible for the horrors he brought to the people in this life is himself.
This scumbag from todays events is no better.
I'm sorry to hear that EBH.
You are a very wise person.