That can't be the best you can do, it's embarrassingly silly.
Checkmate.
"You're making my point for me. The example cited isn't an experiment, it's an observation wherein you already know the answer."
The original scenario was that we were walking along the beach and saw the message, "E = MC^2" in large letters in the sand. How would we determine if it had been written by an intelligent agent or was simply an effect of random winds?
You replied that, "it's an observation wherein you already know the answer." How did we know the answer? We didn't see anyone actually write the message.
"That can't be the best you can do, it's embarrassingly silly."
Well, it's clearly more than you can handle.