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BREAKING NEWS: Janeane Garofalo has showered By Hugh Ken Knott B. Sirius In a shocking turn of events, leftist comedienne/actress/activist Janeane Garofalo has showered and shampooed her hair. Sources tell us the diminutive Garofalo showered this morning, after friends grew tired of her strange body odor and perfume. “I told Janeane enough is enough. I said, girl, this is my shower. Shower, this is Janeane. I even let her use my baby’s body wash and shampoo because I thought that she might have a bad reaction after not showering for a while,” said 24 co-star and friend Mary Lynn Rajskub....

Here it is folks, the Ashley Biden cocaine snorting video you've all been waiting for.

ANCHORAGE, Alaska: Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin will reimburse the state for a tenth trip taken by her children. The February 2007 trip to the start of the Iron Dog snowmachine race was mistakenly left out of an agreement announced this week to settle an ethics complaint with the Alaska Personnel Board. In that agreement, Palin will reimburse the state about $7,000 for nine trips taken by the children that were determined not to be in the state's best interest. For the tenth trip, Palin will reimburse the state for airfare from Juneau to Anchorage for her three daughters. The family...

Smoking may be politically incorrect and bad for a politician's image, but consider the alternative! NOTE: The author of this comic requests that you visit his web site and please refrain from copying the cartoon within this thread. Thank you!

SOUTH LAKE TAHOE, Calif. — Federal agents raided a medical marijuana dispensary in South Lake Tahoe on Thursday. At about 11 a.m., five agents from the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency — joined by members of the Bureau of Narcotic Enforcement, the South Lake Tahoe-El Dorado County Narcotics Enforcement Team and the South Lake Tahoe Police — served a federal search warrant on Patient to Patient Collective, located at 2314 Lake Tahoe Boulevard. Agents seized between five and 10 pounds of processed marijuana and a “small amount” of U.S. currency from the collective, said DEA Special Agent Gordon Taylor. Police made...

She didn't charge as much as Ashley Dupre -- the call girl who cost Eliot Spitzer his job as New York governor. But authorities say Barbara Anderson Cohen did not come cheap. Cook County Sheriff's spokesman Steve Patterson said Cohen was busted on a prostitution charge Jan. 16 after she flew in from Las Vegas and agreed to have sex in a Loop hotel. Her price, $1,000 for two hours, was the highest rate of any of the 120 women arrested by the sheriff's office in stings over the last two years, Patterson said.

Hunting Humor!

Breaking News! (Wasilla, Alaska) Republican Gov. Sarah Palin is being named as a possible conspirator in a weapons theft case reportedly occurring several years ago....

McCain unsure if he'd support Palin for president Posted: 01:59 PM ET Sen. John McCain says he may not necessary support Gov. Sarah Palin if she she runs in 2012 CNN) – Sen. John McCain said Sunday he would not necessarily support his former running mate if she chose to run for president. Speaking to ABC's "This Week," McCain was asked whether Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin could count on his support. "I can't say something like that. We've got some great other young governors. I think you're going to see the governors assume a greater leadership role in our Republican...

Tuesday´s debate between Senators McCain and Obama was relative uneventful in my eyes except for McCain´s "That one" statement when referring to his opponent. Now, this may seem insignificant to McCain backers and maybe even to some Obama, but is it insignificant? McCain´s camp has said it was just Senator McCain´s attempt at humor. I was not smiling. Making the statement "that one" can conjure up some bad memories for some folks. "Which slave do you want masta? That one," the White slave-owner says. "What toy do you want son? That one," the child whines. "Which one of these men...

In an episode of 'The Simpsons' slated to run November 2, Homer Simpson will vote for Barack Obama. As Homer tries to vote for Obama, a machine changes the vote to McCain and proceeds to kill him.

Senator McCain is on Fox and Friends talking now. They asked him why he didn't get credit for helping the economy while Barack Obama was the invisible man nd he said because "life isn't fair." They asked him if he thought a moderator who was writing a pro-Obama book was acceptable and he said "life isn't fair." He talks like someone who has already lost.

I thought it would be funny to create a parody of SarahPalinFacts.com for Obama. However, someone already thought of it long ago. But, it's lame, lame, lame.... See for yourself.

Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama prepared to name his running mate, perhaps as early as Friday, from a small field o0f candidates that included at least one dark horse.

On the eve of Prime Minister Gordon Brown's visit to Washington last week, a British pollster suggested Brown's meetings with presidential candidates Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, and John McCain would be more important than his talks with President Bush. The president is "irrelevant," the pollster said, echoing what has become a view widely held in Washington. With only nine months left in his presidency and low approval ratings, Bush lacks political power. He's a lame duck. In fact, he's not that lame. This is a common misperception about Bush (and a pet peeve of mine). In Washington, the political community...

I thought principled politics was supposed to be all about me. And if it doesn't go my way, I'm allowed to throw a tantrum, turn blue, kick my feet, flail my arms, threaten to support and vote for Hillary or Obama just to make my point. I mean, I didn't get my way. This is just like not getting my candy at the checkout counter. I didn't get my toy in the toy department. People took me out of control of my party and I'm mad. If I can't control my party, then I have to play nice and be...

Davenport, Iowa - Desperate to reach voters in Iowa, an embarrassed Ron Paul today admitted looking in a Davenport woman's bathroom window, apologizing for the incident later in the day. "We were going door to door and not finding many people at home, though their cars were there and televisions all seemed to be on," began Paul. "I guess I just got a little frustrated and went too far. I heard this beautiful voice singing and went see if I could find it. (Sheepishly) Well I found her and..you know the rest."

In the 10 years of the BCS era, we've seen pretty much everything. Perhaps the only major development we've yet to see is a two-loss team in the BCS Championship Game. Later today, that one should become a reality. The million-dollar question is: Which two-loss team will it be? Jim Tressel has watched as other teams have helped Ohio State's title cause. At least seven teams, including once-beaten Ohio State and Kansas, are likely to receive second-place votes in the polls. If the voters rank teams based on perceived strength (who would win on a neutral field), any number of...

Harry Reid speaking from the floor right now, trying to key in as fast as I can .... ... and furthermore, the United States Senate now officially condemns Ann Coulter, not only that, but due to grievousness of her comments, we feel we've no choice but to enact the "Fairness Doctrine"....we must protect the American people from this right wing hornets’ nest praying on innocent Americans and poisoning their minds ..." More breaking ..... /sarcasm folks

ORANGEBURG, S.C. - Democratic presidential candidates criticized President Bush over the Iraq war Thursday night in the first debate of their campaign, and urged him to reconsider his threat to veto legislation to begin withdrawing U.S. troops. "If this president does not get us out of Iraq, when I am president, I will," said Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton of New York. In the debate's opening moments, Clinton also found herself on the receiving end of criticism, when former North Carolina Sen. John Edwards said she or anyone else who voted to authorize it should "search their conscience." Edwards, in the...