Free Republic

You know things are going bad, when you're the most liberal, socialist, gayest president in American history, and yet even the progressive moonbats are down on you. Such is life right now for that guy who sometimes visits the White House--oh, what's his name again? Yeah, Barack Obongo, TPFKAO (The President Formerly Known As Obamassiah). But the bloom is off that rose. That train left the station long ago. In other words, Obie is well into his Lame Duck Dynasty. See the DUmmies dump on their former hero, the guy they used to swoon over! It's all here in...

Angry DUmmie is ANGRY!!! And at The Happiest Place on Earth, no less! That's right, one of the DUmmies is at Disneyland, taking his family on vacation . . . but he's AS MAD AS HELL, and he's not going to take it anymore! What's the problem, you ask? Why, the constant, pervasive surveillance and instrusion on his family's privacy! In other words, you've got to have a photo taken to go with your pass. A small thing, you may think. But this is enough to get DUmmie tk2kewl worked up to a BOIL! He launches into a classic,...

When in doubt, pull it out. Pull what out, you ask? Why, the Race Card, of course. It always comes in handy whenever Our President comes under attack. And so it is for such a time as this that the Race Card was created. For this has been a very rough week or so for Dear Leader. I mean, the Benghazi scandal, which just won't go away, now has been joined by the IRS targeting scandal and the AP record-seizing scandal. Oy! Time for the Big Guy to take a golfing vacation somewhere, I guess, to get a little...

Today we visit two DUmmie threads that may seem like they're not related, but really they are. I'm referring to this THREAD, "So ladies think there's any hope for me?" and this THREAD, "78,000 apply for one-way mission to Mars." Don't worry if you don't see the connection now. All things will become clear. So let us board our Curiosity rover and explore the terrain of Planet DUmmieland, in Red Planet Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, ready to do a DUFU on DUFOs, is in the [brackets]: So ladies think there's any hope...

Let's see. . . . April 15, Tax Day. . . . Boston, site of the original Tea Party. . . . Boston, America's most liberal city. . . . "Patriots' Day," a term that the wingnuts would love to use. . . . So who are the obvious perpetrators of the Boston Marathon bombing? Why, right-wing white Christian conservatives, of course! Teabaggers! TeaBOMBERS! That was the immediate and quite predictable reaction of the DUmmies in the wake of last week's bombing. Never mind the fact that 99% of all terrorist attacks in the world over the past 40+...

Every once in a while, a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!! is so artful that he can infiltrate a DUmmieland thread and actually string together a series of conservative posts before he gets himself banned. This is what we have today from DUmmie/LFT liberal_economist, who discombobulates the DUmmies here in this THREAD started by genuine DUmmie samrock, "They should not be called entitlements.. they are earned benefits!!" What DUmmie liberal_economist does that so upsets the DUmmies is to expose the real basis of socialist wealth redistribution, i.e., that basically the government steals your money from you by force and redistributes it...

Last week President Obama held a photo op an important news conference in which he warned Americans of the dire, disastrous consequences if the Eeevil Republicans have their way and the dreaded, draconian SEQUESTER goes into effect!! Jobs will be lost! Vital services will be lost!! LIVES will be lost!!! Planes will fall out of the sky! First responders won't be there to respond! Teachers will be out of a job! Roads and bridges! Crumbling infrastructure! SCHOOLS! Children's SCHOOLS, Mandrake! The Children--think of The Children!!!! "My fellow Americans, just look at these carefully selected stage props these brave first...

The bloom is off Obamassiah's rose, I think. Some of the DUmmies are starting to see the Vacationer-in-Chief for what he is: a craven politician, beholden to Big Money, who talks a good game, rousing discontent against "the wealthiest among us," all the while stashing their cash in his back pocket. Witness this THREAD, "Obama played golf with oil giants during climate rally." Some of the DUmmies are bummed out. But many of them continue to back Our President, no matter what. I think the Obama worshipers still outnumber the hyper-progs who don't think he's leftist enough. But the...

William Rivers Pitt, sitting on the porch of Mother Pitt's cabin in the woods William Rivers Pitt has been on a roll lately. He's been invigorated by Obozo's victory, and emboldened by the big push for gun control. So much so, that lately William has gone into Internet Tough Guy mode. Wee Willie has been talking SMACK to the imaginary Secondment Amendment supporters he's been addressing, and he has them literally shaking in their imaginary boots. We take you back to this past Saturday, when Mr. Pitt was in his cups and feeling especially feisty and in high DUdgeon. William...

As you can see above, at one time, the DUmmies had no greater hero than Dennis Kucinich. There was nobody they liked better. The former Boy Mayor of Cleveland, the former Wunderkind of the Cuyahoga, the truest, bluest progressive in Congress, the prog-preferred presidential aspirant in '04 and '08, and a moonbat as wacky as the DUmmies themselves--there was no one who could surpass Dennis Kucinich in the eyes of the DUmmies. But all that has changed now. Due to Ohio losing a seat in Congress, Rep. Kucinich was forced into a primary against fellow congressperson Marcy Kaptur--and he...

GRAYSON-WARREN 2016 No more teabaggers like Obama or Clinton! When is left not left enough? When it's Hillary Rodham Clinton. You see, to the DUmmies, Hillary is not hardcore-left enough. They pillory Hillary. To them, she's practically a teabagging Rethuglican. So is Obama, for that matter. The DUmmies have been looking ahead to 2016, and they do not like what they see. For it seems that HILLARY! will be the heir apparent, and she's not radical-Communist enough for their tastes. So the DUmmies have begun to search about, looking for a more progressive alternative. It doesn't matter if their choice...

It's 2013. Do you know where your Socialist Paradise is? What's the matter, DUmmies, you say you can't find it? Where did it go? I thought that by now everything would be hunky-dory. You guys should be jumping for joy. I mean, Our President got re-elected. Some of the Obamacare provisions are starting to kick in. The Congress and Our President just got this fiscal cliff deal done, which will raise taxes on the evil rich. What more could you want? Aren't these the things you've been hoping for? Aren't these the things that will cause the economy to...

Distraught DUmmies protest the fraudulent DUmmie of the Year results that cost Nadin Brzezinski her title. As you know, our friends over at Conservative Cave conduct the annual polling to determine the winner of the much-coveted "DUmmie of the Year" (DOTY) award. Last year's winner, and deservedly so, was DUmmie nadinbrzezinski, affectionately known in these parts as Know-it-all Nadin. Nads blew the competition AWAY with her countless, unintentionally hilarious posts, filled with malaprops, misspellings, all-knowingness, and general condescension, on subjects as far-ranging as Fukushima gas clouds, trend-spotting and tipping points, her own coverage as a "journalist" of the Occupy...

President Oahu has cut short his vacation to save the nation from economic catastrophe--even though he has run up trillions of dollars in debt and shows no signs of wanting to cut spending. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid-my-lips-more-new-taxes stands ready to avert financial doom--even though he has not been able to get the Senate to pass a budget in years. And these are the people who will keep us from going over the fiscal cliff? The DUmmies are talking fiscal cliff these days, albeit reluctantly. The stuff makes their head hurt, and it is not as emotionally satisfying as...

It's a longstanding tradition here at DUmmie FUnnies: seeing how the DUmmies manage to annoy their relatives at family gatherings for Thanksgiving and Christmas. And this year is no different. We'll see how obnoxious the DUmmies can be here in this THREAD, "How Do You Deal With Republican Relatives During The Holidays?" But before we do, let's sing this DUmmieland holiday classic! I'LL BE DUMB FOR CHRISTMASTune: "I'll Be Home for Christmas"I'll be DUmb for Christmas, You can count on me; I'll have polls on gun control-- And the President's on TV! Christmas Eve you'll hear me Spout my...

Well, it's December 21st. And we're still here. So far. But the day is not over yet. Should we be worried? Whenever there is a subject about which we are not sure, we know there is one place we can turn where we can find out the answers. And that is, to the World's Foremost Authority, the reigning DUmmie Of The Year . . . yes, Know-it-all Nadin Brzezinski. Nadin knows Mayan calendars. Heck, what is there that she DOESN'T know? The DUmmies, amid all their threads about gun control and the fiscal cliff, have spent some time noting...

Tim Scott, Nikki Haley, Jim DeMint: Republican diversity, Democrat nightmare First of all, let me say right off the bat: I do not want to do a whole DUFU on the DUmmies' demand for gun control. Not that there's any lack of material. All of DUmmieland, 90+% of the threads right now--this is ALL they're talking about. Here are some typical, actual thread titles: "F*** the 2nd Amendment!!!" "F*** THE NRA!" "Nobody needs to own a gun. NOBODY." "To the 2nd amendment extremists - you have the blood of children on your hands." "If there are bigger pussies in the...

The DUmmies and their fellow travelers around the world are tax-devouring chowhounds with an insatiable appetite. As long as there are people in the world with more money than they themselves possess, they want to tax those b*st*rds mercilessly and spread the wealth around. "Eat the rich!" is the leftist cry. And so a problem arises when the evil rich, tired of their unjust tax burden, pack up their bags and leave. They move to somewhere that won't tax them so onerously--to another city, to another state, to another country. And that is what is happening now in Britain...

The DUmmies LOVE taxes! They just love them! Tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax, TAX!!! More taxes, higher taxes, more, more, more! As long as the DUmmies themselves don't have to pay them. But tax the other guy? Sure! Tax 'em out the wazoo! Where to find more food to feed the federal Leviathan? Big Government has a Big Appetite. Sandra Fluke's pills don't come cheap, you know. So where to look? Corporations, of course. Rich people, of course. They're all evil. (Well, all of them except for the deep-pocket Democrat donors, I guess.) Let's see, whom haven't we...

It's an annual holiday tradition here at DUmmie FUnnies. We monitor how the DUmmies spend their Thanksgiving and Christmas. Now you may be asking yourself, "Self, how can the DUmmies celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas, when a) they don't have a God to give thanks to, and b) they don't believe in Christ?" Good question. Nevertheless, the DUmmies do observe these holidays, not according to the purpose for which they were created, but rather as occasions for family gatherings, where they, left-wing moonbats that they are, can interact with their normal relatives and irritate the heck out of them. So...