Posted on 11/22/2017 1:14:51 PM PST by fishtank
CIA Operative Sent Back In Time To Stop Chris Tomlin From Messing With All The Hymns
November 20, 2017
By: Babylon Bee
UNDISCLOSED LOCATION, MDIn a dimly lit basement beneath the offices of one of Americas oldest churches, senior leaders representing denominations from all over the spectrum of Christian faith, in conjunction with the CIA, are making the final preparations before they send a highly-skilled time-traveling operative back to the year 1983 in an attempt to change the course of Chris Tomlins life, and the state of modern hymn singing forever.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
From the article: "After first commiserating in secret online chat rooms, leaders from the group began to meet regularly in a secret location to discuss real-world solutions to the ongoing issue of hymn-Tomlinization."
Belief That All Three Members Of DC Talk Are One Person Condemned As Heresy
From the article:
"According to theologians, the heretical belief originated with a Calvary Chapel youth pastor named John Sabell, who taught that Toby Mac was the true substance of DC Talk, with Michael Tait and Kevin Max being mere masks that Toby Mac wore when it was necessary to communicate different truths about the band to its fanbase."
My favorite from the site was this: http://babylonbee.com/news/another-actress-accuses-kirk-cameron-treating-respect/
Maybe he could also make Mike Tomlin not coach the Steelers while he’s there?................
If only.
Cute article.
I’d never heard of this guy before. I think time-travel is a must to correct the problem...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jbe7OruLk8I
I love the Babylon Bee.
Not everyone does as I have learned.
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