The Glory of John [Kerry] (Parody of "The Glory of Love" by Peter Cetera)

Kevin L. Kitchens

[HawkeyeLonewolf]

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The Glory of John
(parody of "The Glory of Love" by Peter Cetera)
By Kevin L. Kitchens

Tonight it's very clear,
My record's what I fear.
There's so many things
I have to hide
I gotta make up something.
Something that those losers will buy.

Sometimes I just forget,
Say things that contradict.
But everyone knows
that I'm still lying.
I don't wanna lose now.
I could never find a real job.

I am the man who will fabricate honor.
I'll be the hero the left's looking for.
Married for money.
It's not my S.U.V., but I
Do it all for the glory of John.

I was in Vietnam.
I'm sure you've heard that song.
Took a camera so they'd believe me.
Faked a few injuries;
Shot a running kid in the back.

I am the man who will fabricate honor.
I'll be the hero the left's looking for.
Three purples hearts;
Who cares how I got them, but I
Did it all for the glory of John.

On a dock off of Martha's Vineyard,
Many, many years ago.
Just in time I did save the day:
I kept all the drowning hamsters safe.

I am the man who will fabricate honor.
Flipping and flopping, which one you voting for?
Vote for John Kerry;
Though like Lurch I'm scary, but I
Do it all for the glory of John.

So what I'm a liar
And my pants are on fire, but I
Do it all for the glory of John...

Ooo ooo ooo ooo.

I did it for for John...
I do it all for John...
Teresa's like my mom...
She loves her little John...

© 2004 Kevin L. Kitchens, All Rights Reserved

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[HawkeyeLonewolf]

Another of my many parodies... Hope you all like!

[EggsAckley]

Welcome to Free Republic.

[HawkeyeLonewolf]

The machine what goes "Ping"

[Christian4Bush]

Very well done. Welcome to Free Republic!

"Boy (Kerry) have bad attitude. Teacher (Clinton) say, student do."

[HawkeyeLonewolf]

PING -- Here's one of mine.

[HawkeyeLonewolf]

Pingity Pongity Pingity

[scan58]

Good one! Keep'em comin'. :-)

[Mudboy Slim]

Another good job, Hawkeye!! You mentioned this as being one of many...where have you been sharing yer works before discovering FR.com? Have you ever tried to get anything recorded? That's the next big step, but I like what I've seen so far. (Peter Cetera, though? I realize we're FReepin' 'bout a girleyman, but can't we ROCK 'im into submission?!)

FReegards...MUD

BTW...welcome to FR!!

[HawkeyeLonewolf]

THankee, thankee.

I've been sharing on hannity.com, but to limited response or interest. :) When I came in here, one of the first things I saw was someone else's parody and thought "why not!. I used to run a site called idiotology.com, but it never took off.

I know Peter Cetera is a bit lame, but I figure the song still gets a lot of airplay and would be a familiar tune. Was out with my wife for lunch today, heard that song on the radio and came up with the lyrics (my old one for that was "I am the man who will fight with your mother...")

Never tried to get recorded. I sent lyrics to another to someone before, but never heard from them. My brother is a musician and has recording gear. Perhaps I should check with him. :)

If it's okay, then I'll go ahead and post a few others here.

Thanks for the encouragement!

[Mudboy Slim]

"Was out with my wife for lunch today, heard that song on the radio and came up with the lyrics..."

Yep...that's how it happens...I listen mostly to talk-radio, but as soon as I switch it over to the local classic rock station, my head starts rethinking the words to whatever song I hear...LOL!! Sorta a curse, I reckon.

"Never tried to get recorded. I sent lyrics to another to someone before, but never heard from them. My brother is a musician and has recording gear. Perhaps I should check with him. :)"

You gotta head start then...I've been hangin' out with musician friends fer the last few years, and while they are apolitical, they've agreed to help out as soon as I purchase the proper recording gear. Hopefully something will come of it before this political season is over.

FReegards...MUD