Posted on 08/20/2006 5:40:34 PM PDT by Alex Murphy
The Messiah is a 7-foot-tall blond David Hasselhoff look alike -- and he's coming to save the planet from another 7-foot messiah that amazingly resembles Osama Bin Laden!
At least that's the picture painted by spiritual medium Wendy Lockwood, of Aurora, Colo. She says this hunky messiah appeared to her in a vision.
Based on her drawings, he's a tall, statuesque man whose looks are a beautiful blend between Baywatch star David Hasselhoff and American Idol runner-up Jason Guarini. He's supposedly 79 years old, but doesn't look a day over 25.
Lockwood claims her messiah, named "Harjas," is hiding from the public until the time is right, but when he does appear, it will be to save the planet from another messiah, a Bin Laden look-alike called "Maitreya."
To the uninformed spectator, this meeting will only be an incredible fight between David Hasselhoff and Osama Bin Laden, but really, the fate of the earth will rest on these 7-foot giants' shoulders!
The spiritualist claims that when Harjas comes, he will set up shop near Denver, Colo., which will then be known as the "altar of the world," and, even though he will be jaw-droppingly attractive, he won't allow himself to profit from his pulchritude.
"He won't be a celebrity," she says. "He refuses to be worshipped."
Oh, come on. "Is it satire?" Don't make me reach through your monitor and slap you. It's from the Weekly World News.
If you still think it's serious, we'll call for your elders to come and pray over you (James 5:14).
This is what you should be reading in line at the grocery store.
L
The first time I heard PH do this, was the last time I heard PH.
"The spiritualist claims that when Harjas comes, he will set up shop near Denver, Colo.,"
And he goes ~there~ because Mother Abigail appeared to him in a dream told him to?
Is the other guy headed to Las Vegas, by any chance?
:::rolls eyes:::
;D
David Hassellhoff will save the World? Abe Vigoda is more likely.
And he goes ~there~ because Mother Abigail appeared to him in a dream told him to?
Is the other guy headed to Las Vegas, by any chance?
i think we're on the right track, right steve???
Bwahaahaa, The Stand.
Right On!!
And his name is pronounced, "Harjah-harj."!!!
Bwahaahaa, The Stand.
one of my favorites...
You mean: they are BOTH evil?
Oh dear dear dear...at this rate Great Cthulhu will devour us all! Could this not be linked with Weekly World News at least? Where is WWN's SpyCat now that we need him?
David Hasselhoff! OMG! He's the one who helped SpongeBob SquarePants! We are doomed, I tell you, DOOMED!
LOL!
Ray Walston did that character justice.....:)
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