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Pentagon Recommends Nation Play Through All ‘Fallout’ Video Games In Preparation (tr)
The Babylon Bee ^
| November 28, 2017
Posted on 11/28/2017 5:04:24 PM PST by Ciaphas Cain
Pentagon Recommends Nation Play Through All ‘Fallout’ Video Games In Preparation For Imminent Nuclear Apocalypse
WASHINGTON, D.C.—Hot on the heels of yet another ballistic missile launch in North Korea, the Department of Defense recommended Tuesday that all citizens begin playing through a binge gaming marathon of the Fallout series of video games in order to prepare for life in the nuclear wastelands.
Speaking on an emergency public broadcast video, Secretary of Defense James Mattis stated that all Americans should consider picking up all of the core Fallout games, should they wish to have the experience and skills necessary to survive the coming nuclear winter.
“These games teach essential survival techniques, like how to fight off any mutants, scavengers, or nuclear cults that might attack you and your family after you exit your secure fallout-proof vault,” Mattis said. “Important skills like hoarding bottlecaps to trade for custom gatling lasers or raider power armor are also covered by most of the games in the franchise.”
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
TOPICS: Culture/Society; Foreign Affairs; Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: fallout; humor; northkorea; notfunny; videogames
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So stock up now on bottle caps and Rad-X!
(Gotta love The Babylon Bee :-)
To: Ciaphas Cain
Where are they issuing Pip-Boys?
2
posted on
11/28/2017 5:06:37 PM PST
by
31R1O
To: shibumi; Salamander; Larry Lucido
Apocalypse party at my house!
3
posted on
11/28/2017 5:11:29 PM PST
by
50mm
(.. / -.. .. -.. / - .... .. ... / ..-. --- .-. / -. --- / .-. . .- ... --- -. .-.-.-)
To: Ciaphas Cain; KC_Lion
4
posted on
11/28/2017 5:14:52 PM PST
by
BenLurkin
(The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
To: 50mm
Here in WV we joke that, if the apocalypse happens, we won’t know about it until six months later.
5
posted on
11/28/2017 5:15:10 PM PST
by
chrisser
To: 31R1O
Why is Three Dog better than CNN and all the other fake news outlets?
Because he's bringing you the TRUTH... no matter how BAD it hurts.
6
posted on
11/28/2017 5:16:17 PM PST
by
Ciaphas Cain
(I don't give a damn about your feelings. Try to impress me with your convictions.)
To: Ciaphas Cain
I got an idea, let’s just blow NK into a glass parking lot.
7
posted on
11/28/2017 5:16:37 PM PST
by
Citizen Soldier
("And I was born to pull turnips!" Demelza Poldark)
To: Ciaphas Cain
Love some of the other headlines on that site such as the one that said Trump rescinded the pardon for one of the Thanksgiving turkeys that made the traditional White House visit because he immigrated from Mexico. Too funny! I’m guessing some of the folks from the Weekly World News are doing double duty at that site too! LOL
8
posted on
11/28/2017 5:21:04 PM PST
by
dowcaet
To: Ciaphas Cain
Travis "Lonely" Miles
9
posted on
11/28/2017 5:21:46 PM PST
by
BenLurkin
(The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
To: Ciaphas Cain
So is the gubmint going to issue everyone the games and the game console of their choice? They want us to be prepared, right?
10
posted on
11/28/2017 5:21:50 PM PST
by
Pilgrim's Progress
(http://www.baptistbiblebelievers.com/BYTOPICS/tabid/335/Default.aspx D)
To: BenLurkin; Lazamataz; TADSLOS; GraceG; beaversmom
11
posted on
11/28/2017 5:22:50 PM PST
by
KC_Lion
(If you want on First Lady Melania's, Ivanka Trump's or Sarah Palin's Ping Lists, just let me know.)
To: Ciaphas Cain
Why have we not destroyed North Korea to save this country and our beloved people?
12
posted on
11/28/2017 5:22:57 PM PST
by
raiderboy
( "...if we have to close down our government, weÂ’re building that wall")
To: Ciaphas Cain
Why have we not destroyed North Korea to save this country and our beloved people?
13
posted on
11/28/2017 5:22:58 PM PST
by
raiderboy
( "...if we have to close down our government, weÂ’re building that wall")
To: KC_Lion
14
posted on
11/28/2017 5:24:37 PM PST
by
BenLurkin
(The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
To: Pilgrim's Progress
15
posted on
11/28/2017 5:26:46 PM PST
by
BenLurkin
(The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
To: Lazamataz
16
posted on
11/28/2017 5:27:54 PM PST
by
BenLurkin
(The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
To: chrisser
I love West Virginia. Friendliest folks to complete strangers in the country, by far. I’ve made two trips to raft the New River Gorge. Great time.
17
posted on
11/28/2017 5:30:39 PM PST
by
50mm
(.. / -.. .. -.. / - .... .. ... / ..-. --- .-. / -. --- / .-. . .- ... --- -. .-.-.-)
To: 50mm
18
posted on
11/28/2017 5:31:27 PM PST
by
BenLurkin
(The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
To: 50mm
We’re transplants, but we love the state.
The state’s two favorite people seem to be Jesus and Trump.
19
posted on
11/28/2017 5:33:52 PM PST
by
chrisser
To: 31R1O
20
posted on
11/28/2017 5:38:40 PM PST
by
BenLurkin
(The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
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