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SUV Tries To Drown Man (Time For Some Rush SUV Humor Break)
RushLimbaugh.com ^ | 11/18/04 | Rush Limbaugh

Posted on 11/19/2004 12:22:55 AM PST by goldstategop

RUSH: Dadelut dadelut dadelut dadelut! Trumpet fanfare. I bet you thought I forgot, but I never forget, my friends. It's time for an update. We have another SUV update. Here's Paul Shanklin with our theme. This is "In a Yugo." (Playing of In a Yugo.)

As the snow flies
At a used car lot on the edge of town
A liberal guy and a liberal gal buy a Yugo
(Chorus: Buy a Yugoooooooo)
And they drive with pride
'Cause if there's one thing that this world needs
It's environmental friends who will take the lead
In a Yugo
(Chorus: In a Yugoooooooo)
They say: People don't you understand?
Those Suburbans are ruining the land!
But they'll wish they had a full-sized van one day
They point fingers at you and me
They say we're too blind to see
But do we simply use our heads
And choose another way?
(Instrumental)
As those small wheels turn
Fifty miles to the gallon
And their knees on their chest
They're gonna save enough gas for all the rest
In a Yugo
(Chorus: In a Yugoooooooo)
Then one day on the interstate
They suddenly lose control
Swerved to miss a baby duck
Squashed by an SUV
Now they're out of luck
But they drove with pride
And as the crowds drive past the little flat car
They know they saved a lot of gas
But they didn't get far
In a Yugo
(Chorus: In a Yugoooooooo)
As they're trapped inside
(Chorus: In a Yugoooooooo)
At a used car lot on the edge of town
A liberal guy and a liberal gal
Buy a Yugo
(Chorus: Buy a Yugoooooooo)
And they drive with pride
(Chorus: In a Yugoooooooo)

Our SUV update today comes from Lake Carmel, New York. The headline on this Associated Press story: "Man Pulled From SUV as it Sinks into Lake Carmel -- Quick thinking by four Putnam County firefighters saved a man whose SUV landed in Lake Carmel and was sinking while he was unconscious." Well, my friends! (Laughing) That's a new one!

I mean, we've had these things driving off bridges and outside of parking garages but this is the first report I've heard of an SUV driving a guy into a lake while he was unconscious. "Kent police say that the accident happened at 8:30 last night, when the SUV..." Ah, here it is. See, they're starting to learn now. "...driven by 34-year-old Paul Keenan of Patterson went out of control..." That's because the SUV took over "...on Route 311 and flew over the guardrail, landing 20 feet from shore in the lake. Four Lake Carmel firefighters used a boat to get to the SUV. They used a crowbar to smash the sun roof.

"As they began to pull Keenan from the roof, he came to and began thrashing. Officials say he'd been under water for about two minutes. He was arrested for driving under the influence of drugs, and unlicensed operation. Police say his license had been suspended on numerous occasions." What would that that matter to the SUV? The SUV wouldn't care if somebody in it was on drugs, or didn't have a license. Of course, this SUV got the worst end of the deal. It ended up drowning and besides it had its roof bashed in by insensitive cops.


TOPICS: Editorial; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: humorbreak; rushlimbaugh; suv; yugo
Another Rush Classic. Given the eeevil SUV stories out there you might enjoy this one. Now we have one of an SUV drowning!
1 posted on 11/19/2004 12:22:55 AM PST by goldstategop
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To: goldstategop
Have you ever been lonely... have you ever been blue?..
Have you ever loved someone... who tried to drown you?
... um...ahem..
2 posted on 11/19/2004 12:27:09 AM PST by GeronL (I thought I was moving today, its been postponed till Sunday, I think)
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To: goldstategop
John Kerry to sing at the Opry


Made ya look

3 posted on 11/19/2004 12:32:56 AM PST by GeronL (I thought I was moving today, its been postponed till Sunday, I think)
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To: GeronL
Swerved to miss a baby duck
Squashed by an SUV
Now they're out of luck

My version says:

They swerved to miss a baby duck
They're squashed beneath
a produce truck

Are there 2 versions?

4 posted on 11/19/2004 7:00:12 AM PST by trickyricky
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To: goldstategop

That's nothing. A Chevy Suburban from Texas went to Iraq to help the insurgents. It was captured before it could become a homicide bomber.


5 posted on 11/19/2004 7:06:31 AM PST by Sapper26 ("I don't flip-flop, I pander. America deserves a President who knows the difference" JF'nK)
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To: Sapper26

Did the Texas SUV swim all the way to Falloujah? :)


6 posted on 11/19/2004 7:08:12 AM PST by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives On In My Heart Forever)
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To: goldstategop

Well it is an off-road vehicle.


7 posted on 11/19/2004 7:30:19 AM PST by Sapper26 ("I don't flip-flop, I pander. America deserves a President who knows the difference" JF'nK)
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