HUMOR: Election 2004 Update: Democrats Demand Recount in Texas; Claim Presidency May Have Been Stole

BS News | 11-16-04 | TitansAFC

[TitansAFC]

The Democratic Party in Texas filed a lawsuit today demanding a statewide recount. Congressman John Conyers (D-MI), and Barney Frank (D-MA) joined with other national Democratic figures in calling for a closer look at the vote tally in Texas.

"Something just doesn't seem right," said Democratic Representative Henry Waxman. "There are still provisional ballots to be counted, as well as overseas ballots, and spoiled ballots. Bush only won the state by 1,700,000 votes, so who knows what the final result might be?"

MoveOn.Org posted the following on their popular 527 website: "There are reports that Bush got far more votes in places like Houston, where there are more Democrats than Republicans. This all seems very fishy to us. Bush may have stolen yet another election by stealing Texas!"

Rock Star and political activist Moby was more direct: "These opti-scan devices and touch-screen ballot machines were all rigged! How else can you explain the Bush victory in Texas? The only way to find out the real results in Texas is to have a statewide hand count of all the ballots. I don't believe for one second that Bush won this election!"

Joining the Texas Democratic Party in their call for a recount is Libertarian Presidential Candidate Michael Badnarik. "I'm going to find some way to get Bush out of the White House, if it's the last thing I do!" stated Badnarik.

Imam Jesse Jackson held a rally in Dallas today, claiming that voter intimidation and confusing ballots may have cost 2,000,000 blacks their chance to have their vote counted in Texas. "There were clear attempts to suppress the black vote in Texas," the cleric stated, "Bush stole Texas because of a successful and organized effort to prevent black voters from having their votes counted."

The White House had no comment on the recount, but Vice President Dick Cheney was quoted as saying, "Bwah hah hah hah hah -snort-"

Republican leaders in the Senate were overheard saying, "Gosh golly, gee whiz, we wish they'd stop this! Shame, shame!" When asked about a strategy to deal with the constant calls for recounts, several Republicans Senators said, "Oh I don't know, that might mean we have to fight for something. We wouldn't want to step on the traditions of the Senate or make Democrats mad and upset the comity of the chaimber. We must look professional, and avoid looking mean just for the sake of getting something important done."

[Ptarmigan]

Ummm, Texas is Bush country. It overwhemingly went to Bush. Someone call the Waaaaaahhhhhmbulance.

[vrwcagent0498]

"BS News", huh?

[lilylangtree]

MI and MA--Wonder if Conyers and Frankenwhine are lovers?

[Ciexyz]

hehehe.

[msnimje]

No even Sandy Berger can stuff 1,700,001 ballots in is pants!

This article would be funny if it was about a group other than the Democrats. If they really did do this, I do not think it would surprise too many people.

[Michael.SF.]

Good Post.

It is as absurd as the Dems are.

[MJY1288]

LOL, Scrapple Face has had fun with this as well

[scoastie]

kinda hard for them to believe reality, isn't it... that 60 million people are so stupid....now the democratic idiots will try to manufacture a fraud where there isn't any...

[HoustonCurmudgeon]

Well I don't know about the rest of the folks down here, but I early voted for Bush, cast an absentee vote for him, and voted for him on election day. Being a JR. I voted for him in my deceased father's name, and using my 8# attack wiener dog I intimidated democratic voters on election day.

[doodles2]

It is hard to comprehend how the democrats can continue to attempt election fraud in broad daylight.

In Washington State they are still counting votes in the race for Governor. With over 2.8 million votes cast it is only about a 200 vote margin for Republican Dino Rossi. Everyday the democrats miraculously find a few thousand more provisional votes that "must have been misplaced."

The word for the 2000 race was CHAD.

This year it is Provisional.

[PhotoFixer3]

is this a joke?

[PhotoFixer3]

oh just got it! LOL BS NEWS LOL

[zr2hammer]

These people STILL believe that the nationwide "exit polls" were correct. They just won't believe otherwise.

[notpoliticallycorewrecked]

Question to the Rev and Jackson (In my best Rush voice):

Are there 2,000,000 Afro Americans IN Texas?

[msnimje]

kinda hard for them to believe reality, isn't it... that 60 million people are so stupid....now the democratic idiots will try to manufacture a fraud where there isn't any

I R sew hapi to bee schtupid!

[ladyinred]

This will now go on forever. Don't kid yourselves, they planned all of this in advance to keep the people thinking Bush is illegitimate.

[lonestar]

I was exhausted after voting in alphabetical order for an entire cemetary in Duval County.

[shellshocked]

I'm all for a valid count, but these guys seem to be grasping at straws when they say 1.7 million votes may go to Kerry so there should be a recount.

[no dems]

There's twice that number of Afro Americans in Texas; probably closer to 5,000,000.