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You Might Be A GUN NUT if........
Tropical Sport Shooting Association | 5-18-04 | Unk.

Posted on 05/18/2004 6:31:39 PM PDT by ExSoldier

You might be a "Gun Nut" if:

-----you have ever loaded a drawer up with so much ammo that you can't open it

-----when someone asks how many guns you have, you have to think about it for a minute

-----you have ever bought ammo in a caliber that none of your guns fire

-----the guns you took to the range cost more then your car

-----you carry a different gun every day of the week

-----whenever you can't decide which gun to get, you get both

-----you get your wife/girlfriend to wear Hoppes 9 instead of her usual perfume.

-----you take so many guns to the range and don't shoot half of them.

-----you have an extra room in your house just for ammo and guns.

-----your home page is set to a firearms related webpage.

-----you count the number of bullets that people shoot in a movie and then scream a top of your lungs BULLSH**!!! when a guy using a revover mows down a battalion of criminals without reloading.

--- you know more about the Constitution than your lawyer.

--- your wife leaves you and you don't mind. Your dog gets run over by a truck and you barely flinch. But you accidentally drop your favorite gun, gets scratched and you cry a river.

---- if you ever thought to do your own "Gun Buy-Back" program. Let's face it, even a Saturday Night Special for a $20 Blockbuster Gift Card is a good deal.

---- if you have more holster than Imelda Marcos had shoes.

---- if you never stop looking for pre-ban hi-cap magazines... even in a supermarket.

-----if you can field strip any firearm you own hanging upside down and blindfolded

-----if you have ever bought a gun to fill an old holster someone gave you. (So many times I can no longer count 'em.)

---- if you have ever bought a gun to shoot up a half-filled 20-round box of ammo someone gave you, because you didn't have a rifle in that caliber yet. Ditto for when someone gives you an old set of reloading dies in some obscure caliber.

-----if you have ever accidentally run a pocket pistol through the wash and spin cycles, still in your pants pocket.

----- if you do not own a single fabric-based item (clothing, bags or suitcases) that does NOT set off the explosives trace detector at the airport.

-----if you have ever bought a gun that is identical to TWO you already own, because the first two are out-of-production NIB examples and you can't bring yourself to shoot them.

-----When buying something with pocket change, you have to pick the dimes and quarters out of a handful of loose ammo.

-----if you regularly find guns around the house and in far corners of the safe that you have no memory of buying ... and such discoveries no longer surprise you.

-----if you have ever busted a spring on your car from piling too much ammo in the trunk on the way to a shoot.

-----For you NFA junkies: You know the birthday of your BATF examiner, even though you can't remember your wife's.

-----if you have ever researched a firearm you own to find out the date it was manufactured ... and then thrown a birthday party for it.

-----if you go to WalMart for back-to-school supplies, then must explain to your wife why that includes 1k of 9mm Win white box.

-----if your dog is "Dog" and your cat is "Cat," but each of your guns has a name. (Well, at least the guns you're closest to -- ya know, the ones you've bonded with.)

-----when you say "Damn ! That is a sexy looking piece!", your wife knows you are not looking at another woman.

----- whenever you see a story on TV about a gator spotted in a neighborhood, you think "Crap, there goes another target of opportunity."

----- if your AR, after installing all the new gadgets, now weighs more than a FAL.

----- if any time a wheather person on TV gives the latest update on the hurricane du jour, you wonder if you have enough ammo.

---- if your hurricane panels have shooting ports.

-----if you have to have additional homeowner's insurance specifically for firearms.

-----if the cops have ever called Homeland Security after pulling you over

-----if you have ever carried more then two guns at once

-----when the local gunshop needs an obscure magazine, they call you

-----when you call your local rep's office, the guy who answers groans and says "I'll tell him again not to vote for AWB" as soon as he hears your name

-----if you have more holsters then pants

-----if the movers all groan when they see your gunsafe

-----if you spend half an hour bitching about how the good guy in the movie killed 20 badguys firing full-auto from the hip

-----if your spend another half an hour explaining how the movie would have been over in 10 minutes if any of the bad guys victims had a gun

-----if you regularly just sit and stare at your guns for a while, and the rest of your family doesn't find this strange

-----if you reach into your pocket for change at the local 7-11 and pull out loose ammo along with your change.

-----if the guy working at the 7-11 knows you and isn't surprised.

-----if you have a poster of Burt Gummer holding an 8 bore rifle. ("Guess you broke into the wrong God damn rec room, didn't ya!")

-----if you can actually take a nap in a gun range.

-----if you felt a knot in your stomach when they showed US Soldiers destroying a cache of brand spanking new AK-74 on the news.

-----if you considered that the cheaply goldplated HK MP-5 was reason enough to oust Hussein.

-----When you mount a tripod, bayonet and flash suppressor to your N.A.A. 22 MINI MAG

------If you do a complete breakdown of all your weapons just to stay in practice - "especially if you haven't made it to the range lately"

------if you find more .22LR than loose change when you clean out your car.

------if your nightstand is stacked with gun rags and firearm technical and reloading manuals.

------if you build a portable reloading system so you can reload in the family room and not miss your favorite tv-show.

----if the local SWAT teams stop by your house for guns and ammo before heading out to the big bust.


TOPICS: Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: bang; banglist; guns; humor
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I got this off my club's website and thought it was funny enough to share!
1 posted on 05/18/2004 6:31:41 PM PDT by ExSoldier
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To: *bang_list; Joe Brower; Shooter 2.5; wardaddy; Travis McGee
ping!
2 posted on 05/18/2004 6:34:15 PM PDT by ExSoldier (When the going gets tough, the tough go cyclic. (R.I.P. harpseal))
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To: ExSoldier

you take so many guns to the range and don't shoot half of them.

Shoot faster.


3 posted on 05/18/2004 6:35:40 PM PDT by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
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To: ExSoldier
------if you think gun control means, use both hands to aim
4 posted on 05/18/2004 6:40:57 PM PDT by ColoradoSlim (All we are saying is give corn a chance / (ethanol for a strong USA))
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To: ExSoldier
OMG... that was great, had to send that one to my husband..

you have an extra room in your house just for ammo and guns.

that was a requirement when we bought the house, he needed a gun room for keeping, cleaning, and reloading. It is bigger than our living room, and had to be cable ready...
5 posted on 05/18/2004 6:41:40 PM PDT by kiki04 ("If a little knowledge is dangerous, where is a man who has so much as to be out of danger?" - THH)
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To: ExSoldier

Bump for reference.


6 posted on 05/18/2004 6:42:45 PM PDT by Rummyfan
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To: ExSoldier
-----if you felt a knot in your stomach when they showed US Soldiers destroying a cache of brand spanking new AK-74 on the news

I know a ton of people that felt that way.

7 posted on 05/18/2004 6:42:55 PM PDT by Bogey78O (I voted for this tagline... before I voted against it.)
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To: ExSoldier

If you know how many guns you have, you don't have enough.


8 posted on 05/18/2004 6:45:52 PM PDT by blam
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To: ExSoldier

Yep....pretty much says it all...


9 posted on 05/18/2004 6:49:25 PM PDT by joesnuffy (Moderate Islam Is For Dilettantes)
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To: ExSoldier

----if you have never hunted in Africa and probably never will, but you own a very large elephant gun just in case one of those pesky critters escapes from the Shrine Circus across town and runs amok through your neighborhood


10 posted on 05/18/2004 6:54:05 PM PDT by ColoradoSlim (All we are saying is give corn a chance / (ethanol for a strong USA))
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To: ExSoldier

What does it mean if I am guilty on several points but don't understand some others?


11 posted on 05/18/2004 6:56:02 PM PDT by 11th Earl of Mar
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To: ExSoldier
" if you do not own a single fabric-based item (clothing, bags or suitcases) that does NOT set off the explosives trace detector at the airport.

For what it is worth, I fired a revolver, did not wash up before I went to the airport ... got swab tested and came up clean. I asked the screener and he indicated that the test would not detect smokeless powder residue. True or false? Who knows???

12 posted on 05/18/2004 6:57:05 PM PDT by R W Reactionairy
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To: Vic3O3; dd5339

Remind you of anyone we know???


13 posted on 05/18/2004 6:57:37 PM PDT by cavtrooper21 (Response times: My 12 gauge - 30 seconds / my .45 - 4 seconds/ Local police - ?)
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To: ExSoldier
-----when someone asks how many guns you have, you have to think about it for a minute

-----you have ever bought ammo in a caliber that none of your guns fire

I'll cop to these two. At least.

Anybody need a box of 7.62 x 52?

14 posted on 05/18/2004 6:59:33 PM PDT by Hank Rearden (Is Fallujah gone yet?)
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To: Eaker; TexasCowboy; FBCOUNTYCOMMISH2010

ping


15 posted on 05/18/2004 7:00:17 PM PDT by HoustonCurmudgeon (RIP U. S. Army Specialist Pat Tillman)
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To: Hank Rearden
I don't suppose you could use a 100rd box of 6mm Ball Breach Caps?
16 posted on 05/18/2004 7:03:26 PM PDT by ColoradoSlim (All we are saying is give corn a chance / (ethanol for a strong USA))
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To: ExSoldier
You Might Be A GUN NUT if........

you have more guns than you need AND fewer guns than you want!

(stolen from former Senator Phil Gramm: "Ah have more guns than Ah need...
and fewer guns than Ah want!")
17 posted on 05/18/2004 7:04:38 PM PDT by VOA
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To: ExSoldier
-----When buying something with pocket change, you have to pick the dimes and quarters out of a handful of loose ammo.

I don't have a loose-ammo problem, but I have to be sure not to pull this out of my change pocket by mistake:


18 posted on 05/18/2004 7:04:47 PM PDT by Hank Rearden (Is Fallujah gone yet?)
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To: 11th Earl of Mar
What does it mean if I am guilty on several points but don't understand some others?

This sentence made me read the list again. Sad to say not only do I understand them all, I relate to most. I need a new life .............

19 posted on 05/18/2004 7:09:00 PM PDT by HoustonCurmudgeon (RIP U. S. Army Specialist Pat Tillman)
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To: ExSoldier
Oh, how I love being a gun nut!!! It is my second favorite preoccupation, next to being a traditionalist Catholic.
20 posted on 05/18/2004 7:10:09 PM PDT by Blessed Charlemagne
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