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Awkward: Supreme Court Rules Against Affirmative Action With Affirmative Action Hire Sitting Right There (Babylon Bee)
The Babylon Bee ^ | June 29, 2023

Posted on 06/29/2023 10:13:10 AM PDT by Yo-Yo

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an extremely awkward moment, six Supreme Court justices ruled that affirmative action is unconstitutional, completely forgetting that affirmative action hire Ketanji Brown Jackon was sitting right there next to them.

"Welp, this is kind of an uncomfortable situation," said Chief Justice John Roberts after turning in his majority opinion. "No hard feelings, ok, Ketanji? We're still invited to the cookout at your place this weekend, right?"

Roberts then slunk away with an embarrassed look on his face.

"Today is a sad day for anyone who was hired strictly based on their race, gender, and sexual orientation rather than qualifications," said White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre, who was hired strictly based on her race, gender, and sexual orientation rather than qualifications. "Ah, crap... now this is awkward."

Vice President Kamala Harris, also an identity hire with no qualifications, weighed in as well, saying: "Affirmative action is affirmative, and that's good. Without affirmative action, we will have non-affirmative action which is the worst kind of action. And that's bad. HA HA HAHAHAHAHA!"

At publishing time, Clarence Thomas had distracted himself from his awkward feeling by writing yet another brilliant opinion.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylon; bee
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To: Yo-Yo

More than one ...

Would the “wise Latina” have been selected if she were instead a White Man?

Would the Jewish Lesbian have been selected if she were instead a White Man?

For that matter, would Justice Amy Coney-Barrett have been selected if she were instead a Man?

Even Justice Clarence Thomas, chosen to replace the late Thurgood Marshall, more or less “had” to be black.

And this points out the grave evil of “affirmative action”: it casts doubt on eve the most highly qualified people, folks who are head and shoulders above their peers, if they happen to be part of a “preferred minority”.


21 posted on 06/29/2023 10:46:55 AM PDT by NorthMountain (... the right of the peopIe to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: Yo-Yo

Has there been a collection printed on the debates around enactment of the Civil Rights Act of 1964? I’d like to read this — it seems to me that this odd overreach was what led to the untenable policy of affirmative action.


22 posted on 06/29/2023 10:47:11 AM PDT by Demiurge2 (Define your terms!)
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To: Yo-Yo

23 posted on 06/29/2023 10:47:50 AM PDT by Magnum44 (...against all enemies, foreign and domestic... )
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To: Yo-Yo

Babylon Bee is amazing. Almost continuously producing stuff like this. Brilliant.


24 posted on 06/29/2023 10:48:36 AM PDT by Sicon ("All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others." - G. Orwell>)
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To: Yo-Yo

Is biden going to rail against this decision like he did against the abortion decision? Will he establish sanctuaries where AA is not prosecuted? Will he give a fiery Nazi Rally speech like he did last Sept 1?


25 posted on 06/29/2023 10:53:25 AM PDT by I want the USA back (A man is not a woman. A woman is not a man. There is no in-between or undefined middle. Cat = cat.)
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To: I want the USA back
Is biden going to rail against this decision like he did against the abortion decision?

He already has:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yQseH__Khw

26 posted on 06/29/2023 10:56:46 AM PDT by Yo-Yo (Is the /Sarc tag really necessary? Pray for President Biden: Psalm 109:8)
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To: I want the USA back
Sorry, here's the video link cued up at the start of his remarks: https://youtu.be/2yQseH__Khw?t=2032
27 posted on 06/29/2023 10:58:17 AM PDT by Yo-Yo (Is the /Sarc tag really necessary? Pray for President Biden: Psalm 109:8)
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To: throwthebumsout

They missed the wise latina.


28 posted on 06/29/2023 11:10:17 AM PDT by pas
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To: Diana in Wisconsin; Yo-Yo
LOL!!! Call the Burn Unit!!!


29 posted on 06/29/2023 11:10:25 AM PDT by 4Liberty (Dems loot & riot -called "protesting" by media. Repub's protest -called "looting & rioting" by media)
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To: ModelBreaker
I know this is satire. But Brown is plenty smart and plenty educated to sit on the Court. I think she’s an ideological basket case but calling her affirmative action makes me uncomfortable.

From Justice Thomas' concurrence:


30 posted on 06/29/2023 11:12:00 AM PDT by Yo-Yo (Is the /Sarc tag really necessary? Pray for President Biden: Psalm 109:8)
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To: Yo-Yo

31 posted on 06/29/2023 11:14:05 AM PDT by Lakeside Granny (Vote RED~R.emove E.very D.emocrat~D&S)
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To: Yo-Yo

Wow! Just wow! For the usually cool and soft spoken Clarence Thomas — the words he chose for his opinion are like volcanic fire against all the race baiters!


32 posted on 06/29/2023 11:48:24 AM PDT by Tell It Right (1st Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: Yo-Yo
Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre, was hired strictly based on her race, gender, and sexual orientation (because these things should not matter) rather than qualifications.
I hope the next press secretary selected is a white, heterosexual male. Lets see how much race, gender and sexual orientation doesn't matter then.
Oh, and QUALIFIED, for the job too, well informed and well spoken, gives straight and honest answers etc. But I know I'm dreaming now.

33 posted on 06/29/2023 12:02:26 PM PDT by BitWielder1 (I'd rather have Unequal Wealth than Equal Poverty.)
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To: Bob434

Kamala Harris’s family on her Dad’s side of the family were wealthy slave traders based in beautiful Jamaica. Joe Robinette Biden’s family were also slave traders.
Is it any wonder both Joe and Kamala regard American citizens as their slaves?


34 posted on 06/29/2023 12:04:20 PM PDT by Yolanda (Jussie Smollett hoa)
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To: Yo-Yo

This isn’t satire, it’s TRUE! That dingbat doesn’t know what a woman is!!


35 posted on 06/29/2023 12:07:06 PM PDT by usconservative (When The Ballot Box No Longer Counts, The Ammunition Box Does. (What's In Your Ammo Box?))
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To: Verginius Rufus

Biden has said Hunter is the smartest guy he knows, too.


36 posted on 06/29/2023 12:44:01 PM PDT by FreedomForce
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To: Yo-Yo; Diana in Wisconsin; ConservativeInPA; Bob434; Sirius Lee; TribalPrincess2U; cnsmom
Affirmative Action essentially used the principles of Marxism to support the creation of ideas like White Privilege, Black Lives Matter, and Critical Race Theory. Cultural Marxism, as the heart of this regulation, replaced the philosophical founding of our country.

We see two views of history. Karl Marx says, “The history of all hitherto existing society is the history of class struggle”. This view is limited to what can be observed, measured, or computed. Everything exists within the bounds of infinity. Humanity exists as swarms identified to be irradicated or dominated. There is no perception or acknowledgement of eternity.

The Declaration of Independence says, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. In this expression, the Creator reaches into our world from eternity to endow individual humans with inestimable value.

I think I will stick with the latter idea.

37 posted on 06/29/2023 12:45:11 PM PDT by Retain Mike ( Sat Cong)
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To: Yo-Yo

Is she a biologist yet?


38 posted on 06/29/2023 1:10:19 PM PDT by Libloather (Why do climate change hoax deniers live in mansions on the beach?)
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To: ModelBreaker

“I know Brown waffled on the “woman” question. But that’s just part of the ideological goofiness she had to indulge to get on the Court.”

She is disqualified by not telling the truth.


39 posted on 06/29/2023 1:23:49 PM PDT by jeffersondem
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To: Yo-Yo

Lol. Love the Bee.


40 posted on 06/29/2023 1:35:25 PM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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