Posted on 03/15/2023 11:31:09 AM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
DES MOINES, IA — A local couple has discovered the perfect deterrent to help them handle rowdy children. The exasperated mother and father warned their overly rambunctious kids that if they didn't start behaving, they would take them to Applebee's for dinner.
"Worked like a charm! They quieted down right away!" said relieved dad, Michael Tucci. "They have been acting up all day long, whining, bickering, misbehaving…but we fixed that real quick with a simple threat of taking them to a God-forsaken hellscape of greasy, tasteless food guaranteed to cause indigestion."
Michael returned home from work to learn that the children had been a handful for his wife, Marianna, all day. "I had tried every method I could think of," Marianna said. "They just wouldn't behave. In the end, we had no other alternative. We had to scare them with Applebee's. Let's face it, who wouldn't be scared by that? We would have gone through with it, too, though it would have hurt us even more than it hurt them!"
At the mere mention of going to Applebee's, a look of sheer terror overtook the children's faces, and they immediately began to respect and honor their mother and father. "No! Don't!" shouted one of the kids. "Ground us! Take away our toys! Beat us with a wooden spoon! We'll do whatever you tell us! Just no Applebee's!"
The couple now recommends the "Applebee's method" to any parents struggling with defiant children. "It works wonders!" Marianna said. "It's a punishment that really puts the fear of God into them!"
At publishing time, the Tucci kids were frantically cleaning their rooms and doing chores around the house to avoid a threatened trip to Buffalo Wild Wings.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
“God-forsaken hellscape of greasy, tasteless food guaranteed to cause indigestion.”
Hey, cmon now, grease has a taste.
“Michael returned home from work to learn that the children had been a handful for his wife, Marianna, all day”
My Mama knew how to handle that, ‘boy, go cut me a switch’.
They forgot "salty".
I can’t stand the place. I don’t do chain restaurants.
I don’t know anyone who does.
If they still won’t behave...threaten to take them to Denny’s-or Waffle House.
I-Hop at 2am is great entertainment. Just get a table close to the exit.
I haven’t been to Applebee’s in decades. Most boring menu of any restaurant chain on the planet.
Bingo.
“They forgot “salty”. “
That reminds me of Arby’s, which I haven’t been to in 50 plus years. They specialized in roast beef sandwiches filled with meat that bore no resemblance to roast beef whatsoever.
Very salty, to the point of bring inedible. It tasted more like ham than anything else.
We took our youngest daughter to Applebees after her H.S. graduation.
The brought us a vegetable appetizer tray with veggies that had visible dirt on them. We complained, they took it back, and brought us the VERY SAME tray back, with the dirt still there. We waited almost an hour for someone to take our order, and there were people at only one other table. They never brought us the drinks we ordered. Finally we got up and left, but not before I reamed the manager out. His reaction? Well, he didn’t have one. Not angry, not apologetic, NOTHING. NOBODY was doing their jobs that night.
When we got home, I fired off an angry email to their office. When I received a response, it was for coupons good for our next visit. I told the where they could stick their coupons.
Never again….
Made up Puff Piece would be my guess.
Back in elementary school, my mother warned me that if I got into trouble, she wouldn’t allow me to come home [two blocks away] for lunch, and would have to eat in the school cafeteria.
It happened once, and to this day I remember the cafeteria lunch: split pea soup and an orange. That straightened me right out. :-)
My son was homeschooled and occasionally went to events at the local primary school. He wanted to eat in the school cafeteria so badly! So this young man who never ate store-bought bread etc came home with his report. IT EAS OK BUT THE MASH POTATOES MAMA! THEY WERE NASTY!
“When I received a response, it was for coupons good for our next visit”
LOL......I had the same experience with a flat bed scanner I had.....after a few windows upgrades the manufacturer decided they weren’t gonna provide new drivers any longer.....when I sent ‘em a message like you did they offered me coupons for the next scanner I bought from them......yeah right 👌
And then there’s the cruise line I was on, the only bad experience I ever had, and when I complained through their web site they offered me a free bottle of champagne on my next cruise with them.......again, yeah right 👌
Like I said though, with applebees it varys depon the crew....that’s Ben my experience anyway.
HA! I hate Appleby’s too.
I agree. We did go there years later, against my wishes, but my brother in law was paying, so we went. And it wasn’t bad.
But I still won’t spend my money there.
I agree. We did go there years later, against my wishes, but my brother in law was paying, so we went. And it wasn’t bad.
But I still won’t spend my money there.
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