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Biden Offers Anyone Who Votes For Him A Seat On The Supreme Court
Babylon Bee ^ | 10/19/2020 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 10/19/2020 3:22:20 PM PDT by BipolarBob

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Biden is being criticized for buying votes after he unveiled a new plan to give anyone who votes for him a seat on the Supreme Court.

"Anyone who votes for me will be appointed to the highest court in the land," he said in a speech Monday to seven riveted rally attendees. "One vote = one seat. It's that simple. That's how it used to be in my day. We'd gather around in the town square and everyone would vote on whether to allow a new general store or saloon. The person who got outvoted, well, they got run out of town on the back of a goat. It was a real hoot. Gosh, I miss those days."

Many say this is a clear case of court-packing. Not so fast, says the media. "Actually, this is just court rebalancing," wrote every single journalist on Twitter simultaneously. "See, conservatives have gotten more picks in recent years, so adding 60-70 million seats to the Supreme Court is just correcting an imbalance."

Since Biden is up in the polls, the Supreme Court has begun renovating its building to accommodate the new justices, with SCOTUS annexing Newfoundland to house them all.


TOPICS: Conspiracy; Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; buyingvotes
Breaking News!
1 posted on 10/19/2020 3:22:20 PM PDT by BipolarBob
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To: BipolarBob

CNN fact checked this story and deemed it false.


2 posted on 10/19/2020 3:28:46 PM PDT by pnut22
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To: BipolarBob
Since Biden is up in the polls, the Supreme Court has begun renovating its building to accommodate the new justices, with SCOTUS annexing Newfoundland to house them all.

I think this is really just a trick to force all Biden voters to move to Canada. Maybe the NY Times should host a seance to get Walter Duranty to fact Cheka it.

3 posted on 10/19/2020 3:30:53 PM PDT by KarlInOhio (The greatest threat to world freedom is the Chinese Communist Party and Joe Biden is their puppet.)
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To: pnut22

I’m just as surprised as you are. I thought for sure . . .


4 posted on 10/19/2020 3:31:51 PM PDT by BipolarBob (Rome wasn't built in a day. All Hail the night shift!)
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To: BipolarBob

I see the Bee changed it rhetoric a little. Lately it has been straight news. If they wrote that anyone endorsing Biden, it would be true.


5 posted on 10/19/2020 3:35:18 PM PDT by ConservativeInPA ("War is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength." - George Orwell, 1984)
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To: BipolarBob

You get a nomination, they get a nomination, we all get a nomination!


6 posted on 10/19/2020 3:39:30 PM PDT by Trillian
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To: BipolarBob

> adding 60-70 million seats to the Supreme Court is just correcting an imbalance <

The joke’s on Biden. Since voting is done in secret, anyone can claim to have voted for Slow Joe. So he’ll have to add at least 120 million new seats.


7 posted on 10/19/2020 3:52:00 PM PDT by Leaning Right (I have already previewed or do not wish to preview this composition.)
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To: Leaning Right

He’ll nominate 120,000,000 but most will fail the witchhunt to get on the court


8 posted on 10/19/2020 4:06:50 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (Joe Biden- "First thing I'd do is repeal those Trump tax cuts." (May 4th, 2019)l)
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