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Just sayin'
Posted on 05/12/2012 3:23:35 PM PDT by nickcarraway
We’ve been talking a lot about invasive species in Texas as of late, paying special attention to the issue of feral hogs, which are growing in number and cause widespread damage (but taste delicious). Texas has responded by making it very, very easy to kill feral hogs. You can hunt them with a handgun. You can hunt them whenever, regardless of the season. And you can even hunt them from the skies (an undertaking known as “pork chopping”), if that’s your thing.
But what about that most legendary of invasive species, Bigfoot?
Yes, someone actually asked Texas Parks and Wildlife Department, which regulates hunting in the state, whether or not it would be legal to capture and kill Bigfoot.
The answer was unequivocal.
Yes, it’s legal to hunt and kill Bigfoot in Texas. “If Bigfoot did exist, and wasn’t human, then it would [be legal]. Bigfoot would be a non-protected wild animal,” L. David Sinclair with the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department tells StateImpact Texas.
So, yes, it would be legal to kill Bigfoot in Texas. “It’s right out of the law book,” Sinclair says.
This all came up recently when an Oregonian man wrote to Sinclair, asking whether or not it’d be legal to kill Sasquatch in Texas. (The hairy cryptid is popular once again, thanks to the television show Finding Bigfoot on Animal Planet.)
Sinclair, to his credit, sent back a letter, thoroughly citing various sections of the Parks and Wildlife code to back up his answer that yes, it’s legal to kill Bigfoot in Texas. “A non-protected nongame animal may be hunted on private property with landowner consent by any means, at any time and there is no bag limit or possession limit,” Sinclair wrote. He added:
“An exotic animal is an animal that is non-indigenous to Texas. Unless the exotic is an endangered species then exotics may be hunted on private property with landowner consent. A hunting license is required. This does not include the dangerous wild animals that have been held in captivity and released for the purpose of hunting, which is commonly referred to as a “canned hunt”.
When we ask Sinclair if he thought his letter would go viral, he responds with a chuckle. “I didn’t realize it was going to draw so much attention,” he says, adding, “the agency doesn’t want to get into whether or not there’s Bigfoot.”
While Sasquatch is mostly rumored to be a denizen of the northwest, there are devoted Bigfoot searchers in the Lone Star State, too.
But hopefully if an enterprising Texan with a gun encountered Bigfoot, killing it wouldn’t be the only option. Perhaps they could simply adopt it, a la Harry and the Hendersons, and enjoy the slapstick hijinks that would inevitably ensue.
Bigfoot is married to the President, so she probably travels with a lot of guards.
As the wife of the _resident, she/it gets its own Secret Service.
But, what if bigfoot was eating a spotted owl?
Or, if a spotted owl was eating a bigfoot?
This is probably why there are so few bigfoot sightings in the northwest these days. We saved those stupid spotted owls, and they’ve been munching on bigfoots....er...bigfeet?
These guys could probably bag a Bigfoot with the scopes they use for hunting feral hogs at night.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EymHKsaOpRg
That’s just sad.
Why would anyone want to kill Bigfoot? What has he ever done to anyone?
Nothing. Zilch, nada.
If Bigfoot travels from his home in Humboldt County Calif. all the way down to Texas, please do not kill him. That is one hell of a walk.
Threads from a few days ago if anyone is interested in the comments thereon.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/2880242/posts
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2881356/posts
I wouldn’t bet on that. There are some stories of people killed who were found scattered about in pieces. Other people just go missing. There’s one curious aspect of the Class A sightings on BFRO. There are plenty of cases of Bigfoot chasing people, even reaching for them as they sped away. But there are no cases of someone who was caught by a Bigfoot other than the logger from early last century.
Is marriage to Bigfoot legal?
Note to self: Do not remove shirt in Texas.
Not only is *Her Wookie-Ness* very heavily-guarded, her *massive posterior abundance* has its own unpublished zipcode, apart and distinct from The White Crib.
“...remove shirt...”
Disturbing mental image; b-r-r-r-r. LOL. (;^{0
Really?!!! Sounds fascinating! Got links to those stories?
Probably Bigfoot is an adult Bear with mange/ mites/ parasites.
lol!
Best response I’ve heard so far:
Texas is a special case. If you shoot *both* Bigfoot and your old lady when you catch them in bed together, you can plead temporary insanity. But if you shoot *just* either Bigfoot, *or* your old lady, it’s murder 1.
Your stinking Bear is decimating my bird feeders. She got 4 more last night...
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Just sayin'
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