Abuse of Authority Intensifies [semi-satire]

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 12 April 2020 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

Apprised of incidents in which children have been playing inside the homes of friends in their neighborhood, Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer (D) has issued an immediate cease and desist decree. “Stay-at-home means stay at your home,” she explained. “A neighbor’s home is not your home. Neither you nor your children may enter any home other than your own. Violators are subject to fine or imprisonment. For those who imply that I’ve gone too far, let me remind them that Dr. Michael Ryan, epidemiologist and executive director of the World Health Organization’s Health Emergencies Program has recommended forcibly removing family members who represent a health threat to the household. I still have that option in my back pocket.”

In Massachusetts, police ticketed people participating in a church service while seated in their cars for violating the State’s “shelter in place order.” While this was happening Superior Court Judge Heidi Brieger ordered that convicted child rapist Glenn Christie be released from jail “so he won’t die of the coronavirus. Mr. Christie didn’t kill the child he repeatedly raped. He wasn’t sentenced to death. His continued incarceration during this pandemic violates the Constitution’s prohibition of cruel and unusual punishment.”

In Virginia, the Lighthouse Fellowship on Chincoteague Island was fined $2500 for holding a church service for 16 parishioners. Though the 16 were each kept more than ten feet apart in the 293-seat church, a spokesman for Gov. Ralph Northam (D) justified the penalty on the grounds that “the Governor has banned all gatherings of more than ten people, no matter how far apart they may be. The issue is whether people do or don’t obey the rules laid down for them by the State. If they don’t they should expect to be punished.”

In Pennsylvania, Gov. Tom Wolf (D) ordered police to confiscate ventilators from hospitals that had the foresight to be prepared for a medical emergency so they can be transferred to hospitals that did not prepare. Since there is an existing Statewide Mutual Aid Agreement that already provides for assistance among health care organizations to support each other in times of supply, equipment, and/or staffing shortages, many questioned the need for Wolf’s intervention. Wolf explained that “I need to be seen as a decisive leader during this crisis. Ordering people to do something that they’re already doing is a non-obtrusive way for me to get the visibility I need to bolster the voters’ confidence in my role.”

In Vermont, Gov. Phil Scott (R) has ordered stores to stop selling vegetable seeds because “they are nonessential.” He discounted claims that customers needed the seeds to grow their own food, calling them “unqualified. They don’t have ag degrees or any prior experience. Growing food should be left to professional farmers. All others can buy food at the supermarket like normal people do.”

In Los Angeles, Mayor Eric Garcetti is implementing a “snitches get riches” program “to incentivize neighbors to rat each other out for violating my stay-at-home order.” Garcetti contrasted his “more humane approach to the type of intimidation that was so successfully deployed in the former Soviet Union. We will get similar results—widespread obedience—with less bloodshed. Many residents hate their neighbors. This will give them an opportunity to turn that hatred into cash while making the community a better place.”

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

https://azconservative.org/2020/04/11/abuse-of-authority-intensifies/

[GOP Congress]

Let’s be clear. MANY Democrat “leaders” are using the virus scare scam to implement draconian, Soviet and Nazi-level oppression on controlling the population. In short, this allows the oppressors (NOT “leaders”) to gauge the reaction of the proles, identify conservative malcontents, and essentially try to overcome individual liberties. At this point, the virus is NOT as dangerous to most Americans as the common flu.

Yes, there will be deaths, but to be blunt, one could have put the same level of oppression on the American people by forcing eveyrone to spend $1000 for safety features on cars that would prevent at least 10 times the deaths that occur from vehicular travel. But that’s NOT THE POINT anymore.

Note that it is rarely republicans playing the oppressor card. Only Democrats and RINO’s. Governor Abbot is having NONE of this nonsense, that’s why he’s opening up Texas at the end of the month. I expect Trump to announce soon the same for most of the country, pending state officials’ decisions.

[gogeo]

You’re having to walk a fine line here.