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Trump Recognizes Jerusalem as Israeli Capital [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 10 Dec 2017 | John Semmens

Posted on 12/08/2017 11:32:26 PM PST by John Semmens

After three previous presidents neglected to abide by legislation ordering the United States to recognize Jerusalem as the capital of Israel, President Trump obeyed the law by announcing that we will be moving our embassy from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem.

The move was denounced by Hezbollah leader Hassan Nasrallah who contends that "this humiliation of 1.5 billion Muslims is immoral and illegal. Allah has given all the world to the Muslims. Trump's attempt to claim Jerusalem for Satan and his Jewish demons contradicts the eternal laws written in the Quran. Death and sorrow will be the payment extracted from the Jews and their allies."

Nasrallah's statement was followed by the vandalization of a Kosher restaurant in Amsterdam. Reinier van Dantzig, who heads the the left-leaning Democrats 66 Party's faction on the Amsterdam City Council blamed "Trump's kowtowing to Zionist extremists and ignoring the sensitivities of the Muslim minority that lives among us." Herman Loonstein, who heads the Federative Jewish Netherlands group, condemned van Dantzig's statement. "It is not the Jew who owns the restaurant, nor the government of Israel, nor the President of the United States that is responsible," he said. "It is the man who smashed the windows. Placing the blame where it doesn't belong was the cowardly and obscene tactic of the Nazis for their Kristallnacht atrocity. We must not emulate their example."

Sen. Diane Feinstein (D-Calif) also denounced Trump's decision calling it "an invitation to violence. It's not so much a question of what is right, but what is prudent. Twenty years ago, I was an idealistic young woman who voted for the law mandating the recognition of Jerusalem as Israel's capital because it was the right thing to do. I now oppose this because it is the prudent thing to do. Over the last two decades Islam has become much more deadly in its assault against other faiths. Rather than inflame Muslims by challenging their right to rule the world, the safer course is to entangle them in unending negotiations—as has been the policy of our government under the three successive administrations prior to the current one."

Presidential Press Secretary Sarah Sanders pointed out that "all of the violence carried out by Islamic extremists—the World Trade Center attack, the Orlando nightclub massacre, and the San Bernardino shootings, to name some prominent examples—has occurred during a period in which the United States has refused to recognize the capital chosen by the Israeli government. It doesn't seem to me that the era of appeasement has been much of a factor in mitigating Islamic violence. Maybe it's time to try a strong stand and do the right thing."

In related news, Gerard Araud, the French ambassador to the U.S., took the occasion of December 7 to blame "the refusal of the United States to stop Hitler before his troops invaded France in 1940 led directly to the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor in 1941. If the Americans had come to our aid earlier Japan would not have dared to attack them." The Ambassador failed to mention that in 1938 France and England assisted Hitler in dismembering Czechoslovakia in the infamous Munich Agreement.

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/230809-2017-12-09-semi-news-semi-satire-december-10-2017-edition.htm


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics; Religion
KEYWORDS: fakenews; islam; israel; jerusalem; satire; sitar; trump

1 posted on 12/08/2017 11:32:26 PM PST by John Semmens
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To: #1CTYankee; 12Gauge687; 14erClimb; 21twelve; 2nd Bn, 11th Mar; 2ndDivisionVet; 3D-JOY; 43north; ...

ping


2 posted on 12/08/2017 11:33:46 PM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Actually, the Koran quotes Allah telling his followers that he has given the holy land to the Jewish people. Sura chapters 5 and 17 as I recall. It’s very clear there. Boy, are the Muslims gonna be in for a rude shock for not helping Israel on their judgment day


3 posted on 12/08/2017 11:46:55 PM PST by faithhopecharity (“Politicians aren’t born, they’re excreted.” - Marcus Tillius Cicero (3 BCE))
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To: faithhopecharity

The thing about the thing “queeranus” is it contradicts itself. There are actually two queerans. The Mecca peaceful, and the Medina kill em allah. The Medina overules the Mecca as it was written last. Kinda like our elections where the Dhims lose until they win.


4 posted on 12/09/2017 4:36:15 AM PST by rawcatslyentist
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To: John Semmens

Thanks, John.


5 posted on 12/09/2017 6:01:30 AM PST by marktwain (President Trump and his supporters are the Resistance. His opponents are the Reactionaries.)
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To: John Semmens
It's not so much a question of what is right, but what is prudent.

Seems to me, right is always prudent.

But then again, there is the question of "Do these pants make my butt look big?"

Now I'm conflicted.

6 posted on 12/09/2017 6:20:47 AM PST by super7man (Madam Defarge, knitting, knitting, always knitting)
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To: John Semmens

“Sen. Diane Feinstein (D-Calif) also denounced Trump’s decision calling it “an invitation to violence. It’s not so much a question of what is right, but what is prudent. Twenty years ago, I was an idealistic young woman....”


Stop.

Right.

There.

You were not a young woman 20 years ago. Even 40 is a stretch, you old, Leftist JINO hag.


7 posted on 12/09/2017 6:40:44 AM PST by Ancesthntr ("The right to buy weapons is the right to be free." A. E. van Vogt)
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To: super7man

Let me try to help you with your “conflict.”

The correct answer to whether a pair of pants makes a butt look big is “no.”

The butt is either big or not big on its own merits.

Hence, you can be both honest and prudent with a one-word response.


8 posted on 12/09/2017 9:18:47 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

You are a true statesman.

I see that you must be thinking of running for Congress, where nobody notices butts anyway. Or do they?


9 posted on 12/09/2017 11:46:05 AM PST by super7man (Madam Defarge, knitting, knitting, always knitting)
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To: John Semmens

So, Johnnie ... what falsehoods are you telling this time?


10 posted on 12/09/2017 11:48:07 AM PST by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: John Semmens
Sen. Diane Feinstein (D-Calif) also denounced Trump's decision calling it "an invitation to violence. It's not so much a question of what is right, but what is prudent. Twenty years ago, I was an idealistic young woman who voted for the law mandating the recognition of Jerusalem as Israel's capital because it was the right thing to do. I now oppose this because it is the prudent thing to do. Over the last two decades Islam has become much more deadly in its assault against other faiths. Rather than inflame Muslims by challenging their right to rule the world, the safer course is to entangle them in unending negotiations—as has been the policy of our government under the three successive administrations prior to the current one."

Real, or Fake News? Is that a direct quote, or just a stupid lie?

Have you gotten a gig with CNN yet?

11 posted on 12/09/2017 11:49:55 AM PST by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: NorthMountain

The quotes are basically true. I pulled them together from a few sources and clarified them a bit:

1. Feinstein did call Trump’s decision an invitation to violence.

2. 20 years ago she voted for the law requiring the US to recognize Jerusalem as Israe3l’s capital.

3. She does support negotiation as the answer to solving differences between Israel and the Muslims who demand its annihilation.

Thank you for asking, but I haven’t gotten a gig with CNN yet. I am too honest for their needs.

Are you always rude and obnoxious or am I getting special attention from you?


12 posted on 12/09/2017 1:25:56 PM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
The quotes are basically true. I pulled them together from a few sources and clarified them a bit:

Then they're not quotes. They're YOUR words attributed falsely to someone else. "Fake but accurate" is the province of your future employers at CNN.

am I getting special attention

Quit posting falsehoods, and I'll leave you alone.

13 posted on 12/09/2017 1:36:23 PM PST by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: NorthMountain

Clearly, you do not understand satire. My use of irony and exaggeration to ridicule the left fits within the standard definition of satire.

noun: satire

the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.

Perhaps you are dense. From the urban dictionary: if dense is used as figurative (of a person), then dense means that it’s difficult to explain anything to that person because they can’t make sense of complex ideas.

I admit that my satire requires more perception than the lame efforts of Alec Baldwin in his attempts to satirize Trump on SNL. But I am aiming for a more thoughtful audience. You are not that audience. Heckle if you must, but I see no reason to accede to your demands.


14 posted on 12/09/2017 2:24:57 PM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
Clearly, you do not understand satire.

Clearly, you do not understand that you're just making up fake news.

Perhaps you are dense.

Perhaps you are incompetent as a would-be satirist.

I admit that my satire requires more perception

I perceive just fine ... I perceive that your pathetic attempts to engage in satire are nothing more than fake news ... dishonest attribution of your words to others. "Fake but accurate" is FAKE.

But I am aiming for a more thoughtful audience

You have missed. Badly.

15 posted on 12/09/2017 2:31:52 PM PST by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: NorthMountain; John Semmens
Admit it, you missed the keyword satire in the posted article. Those of us invited to this page appreciate it as provised. Your unsolicited opinion does not count at all.

Just admit to all of us that the satire was so good you fell for it and are doubling and tripling down in an attempt to save face. It isn't working.

16 posted on 12/10/2017 11:11:10 PM PST by higgmeister ( In the Shadow of The Big Chicken)
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To: higgmeister

“Invited”? “Unsolicited”?

You arrogant ass!

It’s a public forum. Disagreement is to be expected.

Learn to live with it.


17 posted on 12/11/2017 4:06:24 AM PST by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: NorthMountain

Those of us on the John Semmens’ ping list were invited. Don’t you think you need to wash your mouth out after the crude talk.


18 posted on 12/11/2017 9:28:52 PM PST by higgmeister ( In the Shadow of The Big Chicken)
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