It gets to the heart of it.
The problem is that our modern culture, beginning with Gen X have forgotten that men and women are sexual creatures and are the way they are because that is the way they were designed, not because society made them that way.
There is so much going on in this dynamic between powerful men and young attractive women that it’s not even funny. And don’t think only one side benefits a good amount of the time.
The difference between sexual harassment and workplace dating can be found in the eye of the receiving party.
If she finds the man non-attractive it is harassment. If she wouldn’t mind him as a dating or mating partner then all is fine
SUPER ARTICLE. Thanks for posting!
It’s what I’ve been reading on FR, but filled out and beautifully expressed. Great article.
Here’s a scenario some people need to think about:
A female employee walks into the office in a mini-skirt, high heels, and a tight shirt. The older happily married boss looks at her for what seems like an inappropriate amount of time - certainly checking out her legs and cleavage. Is the boss thinking
A) How can I get her into bed?
—or—
B) Did she cross the line this time?
She always ignores the dress code but is this time too far?
Are any clients coming to the office today?
Will that client mind?
Could she accuse the client of sexual harassment if they complain (or stare)?
Can her team arrange a meeting so the clients won’t see her?
I hope she’s wearing panties? What I see now is already too much distraction - single males will try for a better view and most females will gossip. Both have caused me an HR problem before.
I’m glad I don’t have daughters.
Can I get HR to talk to her before a certain client visits next?
If I go to HR Will she accuse me of not being able to control my impulses and say it’s my problem, not hers (I often stare are her when she dresses like that and that’s harassment)?
How can I hire better in the future and still avoid EEOC complaints?
Which option is more likely to have just happened? Did you assume the boss is a man? Does it matter? Is option B believable if the boss is a woman? If so, why not a male boss?
Option (A) just needs a quick glance. Option (B) may take an “inappropriate” amount of time - there are A LOT of concerns going through the boss’s mind.
The Roman Senator Cicero said ‘We rule the world and our women rule us’
I get the sense that we’re entering a new puritanical age, but a sicker one. I haven’t quite put my finger yet on what makes it sick, but it feels that way.
Disagree with this article. She is talking abut compliments or showing interest in a romantic something with the woman. THAT IS NOT HARRASSMENT. Only foolish idiots think it is.
Holy crap. This whole subject began with Ronan Farrow daring to expose the Great Harvey Weinstein, he who must not be named, after decades of Harvey “exposing himself” and including full on rape.
People asking each other out at work is a NON ISSUE.
It’s about “suck my d*** if you want the job” or “you got the job, now suck it or I will make sure you never work again.”
Let’s not confuse the two.
For people who might want to hook up with someone at work, it is SO EASY to know where lines can be crossed. Here are the three simple rules.
1. If the person you’re interested in works under your supervision (or is your supervisor), you are out of luck. Forget about it.
2. You must ask them to join you OFF PREMISES. To coffee, for a ride to work, to hear music, to get a beer. This lets them know you are interested in them non professionally.
3. If you work together, and you ask them as per #2 above, and they say no, you may not ask again. They know, now, of your interest, and if they wish to engage with you, they will suggest something. At work, you only get the one ask.
It’s so easy. The above is clear and can’t ever be called harrassment even by total weenies who don’t like compliments.
Later.
Yep, this one’s worth the hit and a read, Joan is a regular Gal.