Posted on 08/21/2015 11:39:57 PM PDT by John Semmens
The Islamic State announced it is filing war crime charges against the United States with the International Court of Justice at The Hague in the Netherlands. The complaint alleges that the growing number of IS fighters coming down with AIDS are "victims of germ warfare originating from the nefarious labs of the American Government." IS doesn't deny that the infections resulted from their troops' rape of captured women, but alleges that "the taint of AIDS is the responsibility of the United States. Raping captured women has been a right exercised by Muslim warriors for over a thousand years. The introduction of this new and deadly pathogen exploits Muslim tradition and constitutes a criminal violation of the rules of war."
The potential impact on the Islamic State's ability to survive is deemed substantial. "Participation in this 'spoil of war' is nearly universal," said IS lawyer Weir Squ'ud. "It's likely only a matter of time before the infection reaches pandemic levels. Our ability to defend the Caliphate is severely compromised."
On behalf of the Islamic State, Squ'ud is asking for the Court "to order an end to US bombing of IS targets" and for "an award of damages in amounts sufficient for the recruitment of replacement troops from among Muslim populations around the world."
Without accepting blame, the Obama Administration agreed to send Secretary of State John Kerry to meet with IS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi or his designee to try to negotiate a settlement. "It's a question of trying to come to some sort of reasonable compromise," Kerry said. "Winning just because the enemy gets sick strikes me as a particularly dishonorable way to conclude our country's interaction with ISIL. Finding a mutually agreeable means of leveling the playing field is, in my view, an attainable goal for our negotiations."
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,178281.0.html
ping
I wouldn’t put it past these goat bumpers, to do something like this.
Nothing would please Obama more than being able to close out his presidency with a surrender speech.
Absolutely brilliant, John.
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