Psychologist Discovers “Anti-Socialist Personality Disorder”

A Semi-News/Semi-Satire from AzConservative ^ | 8 March 2009 | John Semmens

[Osage Orange]

Satire........

But believable..........

[andy58-in-nh]

Hey: I'm depraved on account of I'm deprived!

Dear....kindly Harvard worker,
You think that I'm a putz,
I oughta love Obama,
Instead I think he's nuts.
It's not I'm anti-social,
I'm only anti-theft,
Glory Osky, that's why I hate the Left!

[gitmogrunt]

"I assume Federal funding will be available to our new group?

If we are defined as a new "victim group", there my be a slim chance.

[GOP Jedi]

Liberal study concludes that conservative joy “passeth all understanding”.

[Freedom Dignity n Honor]

bttt

[triSranch]

Did he say this for real?
If so, Y’all better, as they say down here, WAKE THE HELL UP..

US Army Stocking Up on Riot Gear & Training

... The President— has said ——he will take-— whatever action -—he ——deems necessary ——to see that this doesn’t happen. He— will not-— be-— deterred-— by -—formalistic -—notions regarding ——freedom of speech or ———assembly ———that may conflict -——with his ——intent to transform—— this country.”

US Army Stocking Up on Riot Gear & Training

The federal government is budgeting funds for an anticipated “hot summer” of domestic unrest.

“With the likes of Limbaugh, Santelli, Cramer and others stirring up trouble with their repeated expressions of disrespect toward the President, we’ve got to be prepared,” said the President’s Press Secretary, Robert Gibbs. “We cannot tolerate any destabilizing demonstrations of disloyalty during these times of severe economic crisis.”

Gibbs warned that “the army has been training assiduously for this sort of contingency since day-one of this Administration. There is an old saying from World War II that ‘loose lips sink ships.’ Well, we cannot afford to allow the loose lips of talk radio to sink the American ship of state. The President has said he will take whatever action he deems necessary to see that this doesn’t happen. He will not be deterred by formalistic notions regarding freedom of speech or assembly that may conflict with his intent to transform this country.”

[debboo]

Yes, and I have a very bad case of it, so steer clear.

[The Spirit Of Allegiance]

PRICELESS!

---

the self-reported higher levels of personal happiness of conservatives was, in itself, a sign of serious mental illness. “In a world wallowing in poverty and oppression, angst and neurosis are the healthy responses,” Napier wrote. “Liberals manifest a robust magnitude of both angst and neurotic tendencies in their responses to our surveys of mental attitudes.”

“Conservatives, on the other hand, are deficient in this area,”

---

I'm reminded of a song from 20+ years ago, the refrain had a line something like,

"Up Against The Wall, (Happy Bitter Clinging) Redneck Mothers"


$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$


Time for some Comic Relief/Let's Ridicule The Left! Ping

Pun for All and All for Pun....
Funners & Punners &
Photoshoppers & Parodies Ping!
(see keyword FReePun)
If you want either on or off
this family-safe occasional ping list,
you must be out of your minds....


Let me know of any appropriate candidate threads.
I don't ping the list to threads that are sacreligious or tacky or seem likely to become so.
(on or off requests: FReepmail, enclosing a nominal $217.95 list processing fee).

[Lazamataz]

The Soviet Union already went here.

This makes my tagline even more relevant.

[Danae]

Is there a pill for that?

/sarc

[tubebender]

“Conservatives, on the other hand, are deficient in this area,” Napier observed. “Their focus on family, faith, and career is systemically pathological given the over all state of the world. Therapy is indicated.

In as much as I am the only FReeper suffering this malady I volunteered and started my therapy today by opening a new bottle of Bob's Really Good Red at 5:00PM Dago time...

[Danae]

LMAO

Just don’t mix your meds.... ;)

[Eva]

That's funny, I had to read it twice before I noticed that it was anti-social-IST disorder.

Yes, that's me, too.

[MountainFlower]

I always wondered what was wrong with me and how long they would take to come up with a label. But then, you can't apply the label because then you end up with some other syndrome where you live up to the label. so they give you a label and you have to pretend you don't know the label? it is all rather confusing, but now that it has been clarified I might sleep a little easier knowing I have a label that I am supposed to ignore which labels the tendencies I have had throughout my life, or what they would like to label as tendencies.......

::grin:: Do I talk to much? Does that follow the label? ::Laughing::

[Conspiracy Guy]

I’m checking into the wacky ranch tomorrow.

[Conspiracy Guy]

I guess I should become an angry liberal. I hate straight jackets

[ApplegateRanch]

Priceless? I doubt it! I’m sure that, one way or the other, we paid plenty for this idiocy.

[SunkenCiv]

Ph.D. candidate Jaime Napier from NYU postulated that the self-reported higher levels of personal happiness of conservatives was, in itself, a sign of serious mental illness... The characterization of disagreeable political ideas as a mental illness is reminiscent of the old Soviet Union practice of labeling its dissenters as deranged and incarcerating them in hospitals for treatment.

What about hoping that President Bush is assassinated? Is that healthy, Napier, you POS?

[SunkenCiv]

Whoops, and thanks The Spirit Of Allegiance for the ping.

[HowlinglyMind-BendingAbsurdity]

"Liberals manifest a robust magnitude of both angst and neurotic tendencies in their responses to our surveys of mental attitudes.”

That part is true. However, we probably would disagree with the diagnosis of the causes. Unmarried women who have had abortions would exhibit higher levels of neurosis and mental disturbance and there would be more of these among liberals. Children who grew up without fathers would also be more likely to seek co-dependent relationships with an all-powerful Nanny State. It's not like it all comes from compassion or an altruistic concern for others. In the case of liberal hysteria, they would also need to check and compare estrogen levels.

This is psychopolitics.