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DUmmie FUnnies 12-20-04 AM Edition ("Promise that you won't give up")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | December 20, 2004 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 12/20/2004 6:16:55 AM PST by PJ-Comix

In case there are still a few of you left who think that the DUmmies will ever “get over it” concerning the election, today’s edition of the DUmmie FUnnies will quickly disabuse you or that notion. As you can see in today’s featured DUmmie THREAD titled, “Promise that you won't give up,” the DUmmies are NOT going to give up hounding Bush even after the inauguration. They are going to continue to be filled with anger and bile. Okay, DUmmies I promise that I won’t give up. I won’t give up until the DUmmie FUnnies are published as a book (with accompanying CD-ROM) exposing your bizarre foibles for the whole country to see. I won’t give up, DUmmies, until you have all been turned into political laughingstocks. I won’t give up until the whole country has the opportunity for a good look into the DUmmie Ant Farm. I won’t give up until everybody reads your bizarre DUmmieland posts in Bolshevik Red with the responses of your humble correspondent in the [brackets]:

Promise that you won't give up. Promise that you will stay angry and use that anger to keep working at this until the whole Bush presidency falls apart, whether its next week or next month or next year or the year after.

[Yes, I promise that I will stay angry and ENRAGED. I won’t let my boiling bile die down. I will remain incredibly upset throughout the entire Bush presidency. I promise to be so upset about this that my blind rage will allow me to think of nothing else. I promise.]

Anger turned into action. Quest for sanity in 06/08 etc.

[Obviously a LOSING quest.]

Until the right to vote is a Constitutional Right! Until all electronic machines are banned from voting booths, until the software and machines are taken away from Republican Companies and returned to the people of the USA

[Funny. I seem to recall all the liberals crybabying for the introduction of those same electronic touch screen voting machines just after Election 2000.]

I'm going to turn into the Democrat version of Invader ZIM. Sounds silly, yes, but I've already got a few plans up my sleeve to start depriving neo-cons of some of their ill-gotten money. Every little bit helps...

[Soon to appear at your local video game store: “Invader ZIM vs Chimpus Khan.”]

If it takes a month, 4 years, or 40 years, I WILL NOT, NOT EVER, NEVER, EVER GIVE UP! I decided this yesterday. With all the stuff happening lately, the disappointments, I started to feel down and depressed all over again, disappointed in our dem leaders, etc, and I was ready to give up and move on to be honest. But not today or anytime in the future. I'm in this for as long as it takes to get our democracy back! I will never ever give up!!!!

[I'll NEVER GIVE UP! NEVER, NEVER, NEVER!!! A day, a week, a month, a year, a century, a millennium! I WILL CONTINUE TO RULED BY BLIND HATE!!!]

Get involved at the grass roots level. Run for office. Become a precinct committee chair. Go door-to-door on behalf of someone.

[“Good morning, Mr. & Mrs. Citizen. I am here to share with you my ABSOLUTE BLIND RAGE AT THE BUSH REGIME!!! OHHHH! OHHHHH! AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!”]

As Hunter Thompson might say, we will make those crazy bastards pay.

[Umm….Speaking of crazy bastards…]

You can see the fire in my eyes to know i'll never give up. I don't wake up in too happy knowing my country is on a fast pace to full blown fascism!

[You are correct. I can see by the crazed angry look in your eyes that you are a bilious loon.]

I promise with my life not to give up on this fight. we are at war. We are at war, we are in the battle field of Nov 2 every four years (plus every election), we are a divided country, if we give up we lose the war and our freedoms, we are dictated to by a partisan group who have stolen our Democracy from us and fear that we may discover the truth and fight back. We know the truth, we must fight back, we can not give up on us, but most importantly for all that is best in this country we must Win.

[Shhh! We are at war. With Terrorism. But don’t tell your DUmmie pals. It’s our little secret.]

NEVER. This is my KEY ACTIVISM ISSUE. I work on it constantly and will continue. It's about our DEMOCRACY. It's about INTEGRITY. It's about HONESTY. All values I care about deeply.

[Uhh…You left out the one value that you care about most deeply---POWER.]

I will never give up! If we do, this country will look very "Stalinesque" in the future. Maybe "Orwellian" is a better word...

[I’m sort of partial to “DUmmiesque.”]

I'm fairly new here but I'm in for the long haul. I with the rest of you waited four LONG years to bring these people down. Now to have this denied by fat cat trickery has cemented my resolve.

[Methinks your big fat resolve has been cemented to the Toilet Seat of Life.]

I will never give up. Even though it's costing me the respect of friends and family who just wish I'd "get over it", "Move On" and "face the fact that Bush won". I can't. I won't and he didn't win. Period.

[You were probably among the DUmmies who ruined the Thanksgiving dinners of their relatives by constantly bellyaching about “vote fraud” in the midst of slicing the turkey and raging against the "Bush Regime" throughout the rest of the meal.]

It isn't like the movies. We want all of our problems to be either solved or illustrated in two hours -- maybe as many as four if we're talking about an extended DVD edition of our problems -- but that's just not the way the world works. In the real world, you have to get up every day and do what you can to make things a little better, and there are no clearly defined beginnings, middles or ends. It's all one steady march, and the light at the end of the tunnel will always remain at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes you'll think you've failed when you've really won, and sometimes you'll think you've won when you've really failed. No one knows how anything turns out in the end, because there is no end. So you just have to take your best guess and run with it.

[In your case, you’ll think you’ve failed when you’ve really failed.]

I am posting BUSH CHEATED 04 in SW Ohio but it would be great if they started popping up everywhere. We don't have to prove or go into a lot of detail with supporters. It's like thye intuitively know it. If these start popping up everywhere, Rove will really be pissed off.

[Actually the Dark Lord Rove is laughing uproariously from deep within A Perfect Rovian Storm at your pathetic antics.]

Not Angry ,Just VERY determined. Bush won is a LIE! I am spending some part of every day telling people that it is a LIE and showing them why. I am waitng for the Hundreth monkey effect to kick in so we can get the CHIMP out of D. C.

[I think I saw you by the side of the freeway exit holding a brown cardboard sign that said, “MINDLESS….NEED HELP.”]

I'll be muttering, "The mass murdering, retard" at the nursing home….

[….as the nurse wheels you into the play-play ward.]

NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER WILL I GIVE UP!!! Even after all I gave during the campaign while out of work I gave for the recount in WA where I am moving in a few months. But...my husband wants me to give up and its hard. Even now as I am writing this he said, are you in that DU shit heroin?? I normally wait till he is at work to go on here. Just wanted to check updates quickly and he came in. Why are so many like my husband wanting to throw our plans and hopes away??

[Perhaps because, unlike you, your hubby wants to return to this space-time continuum.]

Not me. no way I will ever give up. Oh I get depressed every once in awhile and think what's the friggin use but I always think of my kids and then get angry again.

[Great mommy here. She gets angry whenever she thinks of her kids.]

NEVER--and please let's keep this forum active, there's no other refuge in the whole world.

[I agree. DUmmieland is definitely a refuge from sanity.]

I woke up and asked myself where the f**K is my country. I can't even bring myself to say the pledge of allegiance with the children that I teach. They have taken something precious from me, and I am for damned sure going to get it back. This time they went to far. I will stand beside each and every one of you, whether you are here on DU or in exile out on the streets. This treachery will not stand. * & Co will be brought down and held accountable for crimes against this nation and humanity. If they think the elephant never forgets, they better check with THIS ASS. They have awoken a sleeping giant and she is not going down until Truth and Justice Prevail. No Retreat No Surrender

[WOW! Time to identify “THIS ASS” of a DUmmie teacher and REMOVE her from her class of children so as to attempt to get her under rational control of herself in an Anger Management Program. I recommend Dr. Buddy Rydell as her program manager.]

It's a waste of time to work on other social issues until the election process is fixed. Nothing else matters.

[GREAT! As long as DUmmies are completely obsessed over an election result they don’t have a chance in hell of changing then they can’t cause much harm in other areas.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummies; nutcases
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If ever there were a reason for a DUmmie FUnnies book, this edition of the DUFUs is it. These clowns need to be EXPOSED to the entire country. Their own words condemn them for the fools that they are. If you are in the publishing biz or know a literary agent and/or book publisher, please either FreepMail me or email me a PJ-Comix.

There are now 475 on the DUFU PING List and moving rapidly on te MAGIC 500 number so let me know if you want on the PING LIst so you can get regular updates of the DUFUs.

1 posted on 12/20/2004 6:16:55 AM PST by PJ-Comix
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To: PJ-Comix
I messed up my e-mail address above. Here is the CORRECT addy: PJ-Comix.
2 posted on 12/20/2004 6:21:32 AM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


3 posted on 12/20/2004 6:22:46 AM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix
You may think that you have a 500 ping list.
This DUmmie feature is like an iceberg; you will never know the true number of fans that you have. Hurry up and get that book started. I'm good for at least a half-dozen copies...
4 posted on 12/20/2004 6:26:07 AM PST by Publius6961 (The most abundant things in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.)
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To: PJ-Comix
"We voted for Kerry cause we don't like the word "Bush".


5 posted on 12/20/2004 6:26:17 AM PST by Dallas59 ("A weak peace is worse than war" - Tacitcus)
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To: PJ-Comix

"I was ready to give up and move on to be honest. But not today or anytime in the future."

The sum of their character.


6 posted on 12/20/2004 6:27:47 AM PST by Rebelbase (Who is General Chat?)
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To: PJ-Comix

"We don't have to prove or go into a lot of detail with supporters."

Well that much is obvious


7 posted on 12/20/2004 6:31:30 AM PST by Democratshavenobrains
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To: PJ-Comix

Thanks, gonna read later!


8 posted on 12/20/2004 6:32:09 AM PST by KoRn
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To: PJ-Comix

Thank you for daily dose of laughter. It has become a ritual to come on here and get a good laugh for the day. These people are truly demented and WEIRD! And the scary thing is, they have spouses, kids and STUDENTS that have to put up with their craziness! I would just die if my kid had a teacher like this. I guess that's why I homeschool, but anyway, just think of all the poor people subjected to these rantings if they personally know someone like this!


9 posted on 12/20/2004 6:34:50 AM PST by usmom
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To: PJ-Comix

"If it takes a month, 4 years, or 40 years, I WILL NOT, NOT EVER, NEVER, EVER GIVE UP!"

I WILL SEND ALL MY MONEY TO BEV HARRIS!!


10 posted on 12/20/2004 6:36:17 AM PST by NRA1995 ("Yew jes' go and lay yore hand on a Pittsburgh Steelers fan & Ah think yer gonna fin'lly understand")
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To: Publius6961
I'm thinking about getting a bunch of plastic buckets in nauseas green color to send out to literary agents and book publishers. Imprinted on these buckets would be "VOMIT BUCKET" with the explanation that if they don't get in on the ground floor of the DUFUs when they now have the chance, they will be sick to their stomachs over missing out in the future. BTW, yesterday was creatively productive in that I came up with a great animated feature idea for the DC-ROM that I would want to accompany a DUFU book involving the Glorious Emperor, Chimpus Khan leading a reactionary Ape Army on the liberal mountain fortress of DUmmieland. Elements of "Dr. Strangelove" would also be incorporated into this feature.
11 posted on 12/20/2004 6:36:58 AM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

I did an extended browse of DU yesterday, because it really is quite funny these days (sometimes though, a bit pathetic or even ominous).

Several DUmmies confessed to significant psychological and emotional disruption since Nov. 2: can't sleep, mood swings, irritable, etc. One DUmmie related the story of a Rat friend who is actually now seeing a psychiatrist as the direct result of Kerry's loss.

With many DUmmies, there is a bizarre appeal to outside and/or higher forces to come to the rescue and "tell the truth". Many want public protests (as they sit at their DU keyboards) and can't understand the silence. Many think DNC operatives from Kerry down to Moore are holding their tongues until "all the evidence of fraud is assembled." Note that DUmmies have yet to unveil a single instance of actual fraud in all of the thousands of posts they've made. A very few, very minor human errors, perhaps. Fraud, no.

As is usual with DUmmies, there is the occasionial post that warrants investigation by the U.S. Secret Service. For example yesterday's chit chat about the possibility of rigging a cellphone as a small pistol for the Inauguration, or the longing for a Secret Service agent who might flip out and hurt the President.

Just your everyday sampling of the virtual mental ward that is always DU.


12 posted on 12/20/2004 6:37:04 AM PST by angkor
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To: PJ-Comix
[“Good morning, Mr. & Mrs. Citizen. I am here to share with you my ABSOLUTE BLIND RAGE AT THE BUSH REGIME!!! OHHHH! OHHHHH! AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!”]

sounds like a winning strategy for the DNC, send moveon activists door to door with messages of hate

Not me. no way I will ever give up. Oh I get depressed every once in awhile and think what's the friggin use but I always think of my kids and then get angry again.

I think her kids might have voted W, or * as they call him in DUmmieland

13 posted on 12/20/2004 6:38:25 AM PST by William of Orange (Does anybody know what time it is? Time to bomb Saddam!)
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To: PJ-Comix

"You can see the fire in my eyes to know i'll never give up."

No no no, no food, I want sex! Sex! I want THAT one, the sultry bitch with the fire in her eyes! Yes....yes...that one....take her clothes off and bring her to me!!

(Thanks to Elliot Gould as Trapper John in the movie M*A*S*H)


14 posted on 12/20/2004 6:39:07 AM PST by NRA1995 ("Yew jes' go and lay yore hand on a Pittsburgh Steelers fan & Ah think yer gonna fin'lly understand")
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To: PJ-Comix

"NEVER. This is my KEY ACTIVISM ISSUE. I work on it constantly and will continue. It's about our DEMOCRACY. It's about INTEGRITY. It's about HONESTY. All values I care about deeply."

Would this be the chick who put herself "one work day away from homelessness" by skipping work to make signs and contributing to the Bev Harris hat-passing scam?


15 posted on 12/20/2004 6:41:23 AM PST by NRA1995 ("Yew jes' go and lay yore hand on a Pittsburgh Steelers fan & Ah think yer gonna fin'lly understand")
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To: PJ-Comix
It isn't like the movies. We want all of our problems to be either solved or illustrated in two hours -- maybe as many as four if we're talking about an extended DVD edition of our problems -- but that's just not the way the world works.

Spoken like a true philosopher.

Wow, this woman has problems. Her husband must love living in that sea of hate and anger she creates. I give it 6 months before he kicks her to the curb.

16 posted on 12/20/2004 6:41:44 AM PST by randog (What the....?!)
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To: PJ-Comix

I'm going to turn into the Democrat version of Invader ZIM.

Does that mean he is going to do something for about 3 months and then get cancelled?


17 posted on 12/20/2004 6:42:11 AM PST by escapefromboston (manny ortez: mvp)
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To: PJ-Comix

"Why are so many like my husband wanting to throw our plans and hopes away??"

Because he wants food, a clean house and sex, perhaps?


18 posted on 12/20/2004 6:46:50 AM PST by NRA1995 ("Yew jes' go and lay yore hand on a Pittsburgh Steelers fan & Ah think yer gonna fin'lly understand")
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To: PJ-Comix
This one, PJ, has been the best DUFU thus far.


19 posted on 12/20/2004 6:47:01 AM PST by rdb3 (Can I join the Pajamahadeen even if I sleep in the nude?)
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To: William of Orange

"OHHHH! OHHHHH! AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!”---Courtesy of the late great Sam Kinison.


20 posted on 12/20/2004 6:47:30 AM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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