Posted on 11/28/2016 10:34:54 AM PST by JamesP81
I need prayers for myself.
My wife got upset at something someone at church said. Yeah, I know, old story. This is in addition to a litany of other complaints she has that boils down to "I don't have any friends" and "I'm angry and jealous towards people who have things I want that I don't have." As you can imagine, those two are related.
She is refusing to go to our church. While I could (and did consider) putting my foot down on the issue, I believe it would've done more harm than good to our marriage. Sometimes people need to learn things the hard way for themselves by experience.
Still, I had to walk away from some low level leadership positions and a lot of friends. My friends aren't letting it come between our friendships, but it's still bitter for me and disappointing for a church that placed trust in me.
I'm trying really hard to not adopt a position of throwing my wife under the bus, but it's hard not to. She's brought all of this upon us.
I'm tired and emotionally drained from all this. Pray for my emotional healing and for my wife's instruction, that she would learn the things she needs to learn. For that matter, also that I'd learn the things I need to learn.
Also, for my (soon to be former) church. The church itself is struggling in many ways, and I love the people there. Breaks my heart to see what's going on. Breaks it more to leave the battle for reasons I have almost no control over.
You have my prayers, and my empathy.
My pastor just preached a message on unity. His basic doctrine is this: In essentials, unity. In non-essentials, liberty. In all things, love. That’s kept our church together for 35 years.
I don’t know what the issue is, but I suspect it’s one of the non-essentials. I’m very sorry you’re having to choose.
Praying for you and her.
Sending prayers for you.
Ask God for His help and don’t expect things to change immediately. It will happen on His time table not on any humans. I will pray with you for His help.
Prayers up. Sounds like a very sad situation. One which is not wholly foreign to many of us, I suspect. I hope things work out for you, your wife, and your church.
Maybe your wife could simply attend a different church, while you remain in the one you love.
I’ve never heard of a vanity for prayers being requested because someone said something bad at church. medical, financial...sure but this takes the cake. Seriously. If that’s the case, I should be the one asking for prayers because of the liberal crap coming from the my idiotic liberal parish every weekend mass for the past 10 years. However, you have my prayers.
Prayers for you and your wife. She needs what support you can give her but she may not reciprocate. I’ve been down this trail. May God bless.
My first suggestion is that you leave that church and find a scripture following bible based Christian Charismatic church. They are easy to find because they are the noisy church you may have previously avoided.
A born again Christian thanks God for what they have and trust God for what they need.
Prayers are not for asking God; prayers are for thanking God.
Family comes first. The rest will work itself out.
You, your wife and your church have my prayers now. For wisdom, knowledge, understanding and the peace that only our Lord can give. Holding you all up in that prayer now.
Prayers up for you James. This is a difficult situation that I wrestled with in my own marriage with my now ex-wife and also as legal counsel to my pastor whose wife went way off the reservation. No easy solutions and I think you are right to allow the Holy Spirit to be the principal advent of change.
If I were you, I wouldn’t go to church at all. I would find a home church where your wife would be able to have a group of people who care about her. She does need friends. If you can’t find a home church right away, just stay at home and watch something on tv until you do. She has probably been unable to easily make friends her whole life. She is lashing out at the people at your church because of it. Don’t feel sorry for yourself, Christians are called to sacrifice not do low level callings if they interfere.
Notre Père qui es aux cieux,
Que ton Nom soit sanctifié, que ton règne vienne,
Que ta volonté soit faite sur la terre comme au ciel.
Donne-nous aujourd'hui notre pain de ce jour.
Pardonne-nous nos offenses, comme nous pardonnons aussi à ceux qui nous ont offensès.
Et ne nous soumets pas à la tentation, mais délivre-nous du mal.
Car c'est à Toi qu'appartiennent le règne, la puissance et la gloire,
pour les siècles des siècles. Amen
Je vous salue, Marie, pleine de grâces,
le Seigneur est avec vous, vous êtes bènie entre toutes les femmes,
et Jésus le fruit de vos entrailles est béni.
Sainte Marie, Mère de Dieu, priez pour nous pauvres pécheurs,
maintenant, et à l'heure de notre mort. Ainsi-soit-il.
Garde la Foi, mes amis! Nous nous sommes les sauveurs de la République! Maintenant et Toujours!
(Keep the Faith, my friends! We are the saviors of the Republic! Now and Forever!)
LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)
Absolutely, stay in prayer. Sometimes, a husband has to lead, in my humble opinion, however. Have you thought about discussing this with you pastor? You sound like a really good person who needs support right now. Some days are tough. I've been around a while, and I find if you look to God and try do the right things, then in time situations will work themselves out. It can be a long slog, however. Look for support from your friends and community—no spouse has the right to cut her partner off from other people. If this were a reverse situation, and a husband was trying to separate a wife from a community she found supportive, we would call that spouse controlling and potentially abusive.
“My first suggestion is that you leave that church and find a scripture following bible based Christian Charismatic church. They are easy to find because they are the noisy church you may have previously avoided.”
Yup. I thought so too. Why would we want to waste the Lord’s time with a simple fix? Sheesh, this vanity prayer request is an oddball.
The Verse that pops into my mind is the Commandment from scripture for men to love their wives as Christ loves the Church.
I don’t know the situation so I can’t offer any advice. Not that it would be worth anything anyway.
https://www.google.com/search?safe=off&q=dread+game
For places dedicated to Peace, some of the worst viper pits I’ve ever seen were in the Fellowship Hall after Sunday morning service.
You have my empathy.
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