Posted on 08/14/2015 7:48:39 PM PDT by proud American in Canada
Hi,
I feel like I have relied on FR so much recently. Everything is breaking down around here. My husband checked himself into a hospital a couple of days ago; he needs heart bypass surgery.
My son and daughter are in the Gaspe peninsula visiting their grandmother. They will come back in a week, except my son will be stopping in Montreal to go to college.
Our house is falling apart; we have no exterior back wall and the insurance won't pay for it, that will cost $15K Canadian.
I am a lawyer in Colorado, but don't really know the ropes here in QC, especially in French.
I had my drivers license suspended for medical reasons; I am now on medication and should get it back soon. I have to, because my husband won't be allowed to drive after he has his surgery, which he won't have for another two weeks.
I just don't know what to do, except I do retreat to the feelings I have felt since I was fourteen... I was a "cutter" before it was cool. Over thirty years ago, I would walk from my law school dorm room in Chicago to the Walgreens... to buy razor blades. It felt so good to cut myself.
Now, all I can think about is finding those stupid keys for the gun locks that my husband put on his guns (he knows me too well).
I used to think I had something to contribute to the world. Now, I am not sure.
I called the hospital and I just wanted to go over there and sleep in a cot next to him, but I'm not allowed.
It's just me and my black Lab named Ellie.
Anyway, sorry to bother you all. Just wondered if anyone else here felt like this sometimes and what did you do about it?
A friend’s wife killed herself and destroyed his life and his mind. I hate her.
Never give up hope. Rely on family and friends. Keep your dog with you; you’ll feel better for it. Pray. And don’t forget that you have a lot of friends who care about you, right here.
All is well. You are amazing and all is well. You are not a teenager any more and that’s as it should be.
Instead, you are the most grown up you have ever been.
Just read your own encouragements to others that you yourself wrote, have some tea, think about the good things.
Prayers are out for you and yours.
try to find helpful person(s) asap
church, synagogue, some sort of good counselor/psychologist..
(I think Canada Health has them)
but call local church or synagogues of your choice, reputable ones, and ask for the clergy and just say its urgent or an ‘emergency situation’ if you have to ... but get through to someone(s) who will be helpful for you
we all go through things like this.!!!! and we do get through them, believe it or not!!!!!!!!
but it is so much easier if you have somebody supportive to be there to chat with you, also .... second idea...
this may sound silly... but please listen...
if you really can’t do anything about the problems tonight or tomorrow..... then please also find some activities you enjoy doing (preferably with other good people) but find some activities you like! just temporarily....
but it is helpful, very helpful...especially if you can’t do anything about the problems just now.....to get your mind involved in something more pleasant, even though I admit it is a temporary diversion and all that... .it HELPS!
make those calls first, please, and if a couple can’t help or don’t care, KEEP CALLING until you find someone responsible who can show you some support, companionship, and possibly even a little practical assistance
please get to it.
now.
please.
thanks
But there is also something else to consider. A living human being is a reservoir of value, much like money in the bank. There is so much good that you can do, many people that you can help. Volunteering at a soup kitchen, reading to lonely old folks at a retirement home, etc.
Turning your back to all that is like turning your back on found money while there are poor people who desperately need that money. Your life has great value. Live for those people who need you!
God, the universe, whoever or whatever, loves you so much. You can ask for help. There is an un-being that wants you dead, it can influence you without your realizing it. You have to remember the people that would have a hole torn out of their hearts if you were gone. Don’t let yourself be alone. Others need you as much as you need them. Find someone who needs something only you can give, if you don’t give it, it won’t be received. You are needed. Just find where.
Ellie needs you to stick around for a bit. Call a help line.
Woof! (That means now in dog speak.)
1. Go to a local church and find the minister. Seek professional help. Never commit suicide. People love you very much. God loves you very much.
No matter how bad it seems to you some are handling worse problems.
I will pray for you.
I feel your pain. But, truthfully, all bad situations pass with time. Please, please don’t take a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
As a survivor of a family suicide...I plead with you not to inflict that permanent pain on your husband and children.
Reach out and get help.
Lord, we lift up your hurting people whose lives have become so painful they do not wish to continue on. Holding on to God's promise for them...."For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11
Help them to see a better future in Jesus name.
I will be praying for you.
You need to look at the positive side too. Consider your glass half full. And there are so many in worse conditions than yours that could use your help too. You can have a greater purpose if you apply yourself to it. That is my advice. Good luck.
“My son committed suicide over 5 years ago, the hurt will never leave. Seek immediate medical attention! God loves you and would never want you to take your on life! God Bless, will be praying for you”
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I am so so sorry to hear that. I do know that life is the greatest gift.
I lost the chance to lose my virginity when I was around 19 because my so-called boyfriend asked me if I would be willing to have an abortion. My instinct kicked in and I said, “No, I can’t do that.
Looking back, I’m kind of proud of myself for saying that. :)
Jesus saves. He is the only way I can live in this world. He is my source of strength when I can not go on. There is a billy Graham ministries phone line that you can call to talk to someone who knows your exact situation. The number is 877-247-2426. Please call that number. Do not give up. Like the other poster said, your husband needs you too. You hang in there.
Woof! (That means now in dog speak.)
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LOL!!! Ellie is looking at me with a weird look on her face. :) Dogs are the best... :)
Thank you both. I try to reply to everyone. You are all so wonderful. :)
+1. I would only add that it is also a *cowardly* way out. Your family is in a mess right now, and offing yourself won't fix that mess. You'll only be abandoning the people who are counting on you.
You need to get yourself together. There's probably not a single person who has never had the thought of suicide pass through their minds. So no guilt there. But put things in perspective. You know for a fact that people have been in even worse circumstances than you, and have persevered.
So you can, too. Just do what you know needs to be done to get your family through. And you'll be doing the right thing.
You are special! Lifting u n prayer
Your Ellie can help you, she finds joy in simple things and enjoys every waking minute. I’m sure she’s not worried about the back wall of the house. Revel in her perception of your shared world for a while, it’ll help take the pressure of your worries and fears away for at least a little while, long enough to get some perspective. There are people who love you, plus at least one dear animal. You matter more than you know, understand that.
When it gets tough, I pray the Memorare Prayer:
REMEMBER, O most gracious Virgin Mary,
that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection,
implored thy help, or sought thy intercession
was left unaided.
Inspired with this confidence,
I fly to thee, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother;
to thee do I come; before thee I stand,
sinful and sorrowful.
O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions,
but in thy mercy hear and answer me.
Amen.
When it is especially bad, pray a decade.
It is a very powerful intercessory prayer.
God Bless!
When a person contemplates this, they are not thinking clearly. When they reach out, as you have, it means there is hope. If I could reach you I would hug you. My heart goes out to you.
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