Let's Come Up With The Dumbest Bergdahl-Swap Defense!

Original Content | June 7, 2014 | By Laz A. Mataz

[Lazamataz]

Recently, I documented the insane verbal diarrhea-like fountain of lame Bergdahl-Taliban swap justifications. They consist of "we did it because Bergdahl was in bad health", "because he is a soldier who served with honor and distinction", "Hey! Those who criticize him are Swiftboating him!", "The platoon colleagues who criticize Bergdahl are psychopaths", "If you don't like this swap, you are a racist who hates Obama", and "Obama couldn't inform congress because the Taliban would kill Bergdahl".

But they just won't stop, and it seems like it is a race to the worst. Mark Finkelstein documents an even lamer excuse: "That we wouldn't leave a good Jewish kid over in Afganistan, you know."

So, I figure the administration is running out of super-lame excuses for this politically motivated, purposefully distracting terrorist favoring deal. Free Republic to the rescue! We can help!

Here is my entry. Put yours on the thread:

"April 15 just passed, and Bergdahl's father took a huge tax hit because he could no longer claim Bowe Bergdahl as a dependent. We needed to swap five dangerous Taliban terrorists to give Bergdahl senior a little tax relief. What are you, a Tax-lover????"

[xzins]

We had to swap Bergdahl because of individual determination. In the same way that Panama should have been allowed self-determination, so did Bergdahl and the Taliban 5 deserve self-determination. They should be known for their votes, not for their non-votes!

[aquila48]

” We have to TRY thinking of teH SutUpiDz...to them it flows like water.”

How true! The latest from Senator King of Maine is that we would have to release them pretty soon anyway so why not do it now and get a deserter in exchange.

[Ez2BRepub]

Nancy “stretch” Pelosi- We had to exchange him to find out about him

[IYAS9YAS]

“We were hoping you wouldn’t notice.”

[WildHighlander57]

Send it to all the tea party, they will love it!

[Vendome]

We swapped one lousy traitor, a Terrorist Posuer, when we already had 5 perfectly good ones?

It’s akin to trading a pawn for 5 queens.

Who T.F. got rooked on this deal?

[henkster]

Exchange? I thought they said “sex change!”

[Seizethecarp]

“The other side of this coin is Apario’s earth shattering news. If it’s as big as he says it is and that world will not be able to ignore it than maybe we have a chance to stop him from what he has obviously started in his lame duck session before the midterms. Otherwise RIP America....”

Exactly!

This is what Obots and FReeper after-birthers fail to grasp, IMO. Yes, the Clinton impeachment failed but, IMO Arpaio’s evidence will implicate Barry and the DNC and/or the Chicago Commies and/or Muzzies much more along the lines of Nixon and his attorney general, John Mitchell who DID go to jail.

Arpaio MUST have his ducks in a row before going public because Barry’s backers will have murderous thugs and hundreds of $$ millions to spend to pull the plug on media dissemination of the truth in all outlets around the world.

[GregNH]

Arpaio MUST have his ducks in a row before going public

This has been the stumbling block from the beginning.

[rodguy911]

How bout the truth. Zero and the gang of Chicago thugs all want to reverse the good done by our troops in Afghanistan. They have already got a good start on reversing Iraq now its Afghanistan's’ turn.Releasing the five biggest terror types all familiar with Afghanistan will go along way to turn the country back into the terror hideout it was timing is also perfect.

[Lazamataz]

I actually thought about that one! :)

[Vendome]

Yahtzee!!!

[Vendome]

It’s that next morning look and I thought the same thing...

Not guilty....

[Vendome]

As far as I know they are Calvinists and home schooled their Idiot Savante’

[Vendome]

NO, NO, NO....

He was looking for tiramasu....

[Cvengr]

Not enough tinfoil.

When the Malaysia Airliner drifted in between a UFO and Chinese interceptors, they accidently shot the airliner causing one engine to flame out and knocked out proper black box functionality.

The expert Muslim pilot jettisoned one engine, which he had privately rigged to protect his passengers (which is why the engine maintenance signals errantly sent a displaced location), but without that one engine, could then only maintain the flight by using the surface effect by flying below 100ft ASL using a modified pony engine.

It disappeared from all radar and he returned to his last known Islamic refuge, flying the Boeing like Slim Pickens in Dr. Strangelove.

Islamic nuclear madmen, working in cahoots with SMERSCH, THRUSH, the Persian Office of Stratgic Tomfoolery (POST), the NORKORNUKEMALL Ministry, and other unnamed evil villains proceeded to arm the aircraft with atomic devices in asymmetric proliferation of nuclear warfare.

Several weeks later, Kume island, 90km to the west of Okinawa is struck with the evil laden Boeing, controlled by the evil Triumvirate of Taliban, POST, and NORKORNUKEMALL, as a demonstration of their powerful control.

By secret emissary, the Evil Triumvirate (ET), contacted Obama via Dennis Rodman and demanded the return of at least five most wanted criminals from the Guantanamo Bay Special Guest Holding Facility.

Under extortion of detonating another atomic device, positioned to initiate WWIII between China, the US, and Russia, the Obama Administration carefully considered several alternate courses of action, in response to the Taliban demands.

Release of several unshaven Islamic extremists appeared to be the best COA, as they also appeared as a Duck Dynasty Wantabe, or in their parlance, the Muslim Mallard MAFTAA (MMM).

Meanwhile, the released MMM are being tracked by drone surveillance for immediate execution, unless Bergdahl also becomes an MMM stand-in.

[Lazamataz]

WOW!

You put work into that!

WONDERFUL!

[matt1234]

Cuba might capsize at any moment, so we need to empty Gitmo ASAP.

[Bullish]

I’m gonna blame it all on magic mushrooms and Salem cigarettes and that’s my final answer.

[b4its2late]

Obama’s dog pawed the order.