Bezos!
Posted on 10/13/2021 4:31:50 PM PDT by DFG
On Wednesday, William Shatner, the beloved Boston Legal actor famous for portraying attorney Denny Crane, traveled to space.
Shatner was one of four people aboard Jeff Bezos’s cucumber-shaped Blue Origin rocket as it soared to the edge of the atmosphere, offering breathtaking views and a few minutes of weightlessness. The shaft of the eggplant-shaped craft then detached and passengers floated back to earth. The mission seemed to be a success, but concerned witnesses said something about Shatner seemed off.
"He seemed…evil," said another crew member. "And he had a black goatee that really added to his evil look."
After attempting to sabotage the next flight by removing the inertial dampeners and randomly attacking a civilian in a red shirt, Shatner declared that West Texas, where he landed, was “now part of the Terran Empire.” When Bezos attempted to congratulate him on his journey, Shatner cracked a bunch of bald jokes and mocked Bezos for being only the second richest person in the world.
Experts theorize that somewhere in the lower atmosphere, the mushroom-shaped vessel encountered a disruption in the space/time continuum, and the William Shatner from our reality was replaced by a sinister William Shatner from a parallel timeline. Worst of all, the mirror Shatner is almost indistinguishable from our William Shatner, save his striking goatee and big, thick, evil eyebrows.
Thankfully, the threat posed by evil William Shatner is predicted to be short-lived since, like the real William Shatner, he is 90 years old. Due to his age, he will probably return to the heavens soon, and this time not in a bratwurst-shaped spacecraft.
He was famous before Boston Legal.
Oh, it’s the Bee.
Should have known.
That was no bratwurst.
Bezos!
[Thankfully, the threat posed by evil William Shatner is predicted to be short-lived since, like the real William Shatner, he is 90 years old. Due to his age, he will probably return to the heavens soon, and this time not in a bratwurst-shaped spacecraft.]
What crap mocking Shatner’s age and possible upcoming death. Not funny at all.
TJ Hooker
He hangs out on Twitter.
He would probably laugh at this.
It made me think that she should go in space with Shatner, and when she comes back the world suddenly becomes fascist and a dictator is ruling over the United States.
-PJ
Great episode...Evil Spock was particularly interesting.
First Bee fail I’ve ever seen.
He would laugh. Then he would point out that it was Spock who got the silly goatee, while he just wore a cool vest to show off his guns and tan.
I can think of numerous names for it's shape.
cucumber is the least of them.
Definitely NOT cucumber or eggplant shaped.
The Bee has done better. This one...meh.
His three fellow crew members in red uniforms came back alive....go figure.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.