RUMOR ON WALLSTREET: Bin Laden Captured

KOH-AM 780 ^ | 8-20-03 | John Sanchez

[Atlas Sneezed]

Our local financial reporter just attributed today's stock market gains to a rumor sweeping Wall Street that Osama Bin Laden has just been captured.

ONLY A RUMOR! (But you heard it here first.)

[Maigrey]

Actually, I was thinking that I would pop the corn while I was in the shower. (and maybe invite the Viking Kitties over to watch the show....)

[Conspiracy Guy]

I've got the SOB tied to a tree in my hog pen at the house. He is really mad.

[Coop]

The caves had been invulnerable to Soviet bombs, so OBL may not have known about the US bunker busters.

He's not a dumb man, so I kind of doubt this. But even then, he strikes me as the kind who would have cleared out long before the enemy started closing in.

[Quilla]

Not to mention your neighbors downwind.

:)

[GovernmentShrinker]

I was working on a trading floor in NYC back in 1993, when the "rumor" started that there had been an explosion at the World Trade Center. For about 20 minutes everybody was sure it was just a prank rumor started by traders, since there was nothing on the news about it (turned out that was because the power to the broadcast towers on top of the WTC had been knocked out by the explosion). Finally, when none of the traders could reach any of their counterparts at the WTC, people started to believe.

[Aric2000]

This could be series

[dogbrain]

"I already took a shower, but maybe for the fun of it I'll take another."

then maybe a nice, unbalanced load of towels on the spin cycle....

[ninenot]

Baghdad Bob denies the rumor.

[ninenot]

Greenspan started the rumor.

[FreeAtlanta]

lol, don't feed the hogs!

[AngryJawa]

I still don't understand why so many people believe that OBL waited around at Tora Bora for our forces to come bomb him. He's a cowardly terrorist. It just makes no sense to me.

When I finally see that raggedy-ass POS star in a new video, then I'll believe that some arm of the US military didn't turn him into fertilizer. If and when I do see it, I'll apologize in a most humble manner.

The audio tapes, IMHO, are bogus.

[Dead Dog]

scoop the maggots up and place them in a bucket.

[smadurski]

(sarcasm on)cant be true after all we all know that bush has osama on ice untill near the election of 04 in case he decides to even let us have elections. if we do have elections they will bring out the bodies of saddam and osama to get votes. If yall read DU you would know this. Since only us DUers know the real truth. (sarcasm off)

actually I kind of doubt it, if we had him it would be plastered all over the tv they would even interupt the soaps for this.

[Peach]

From your lips to God's ears.

[savedbygrace]

Dying is easy, comedy is hard.

And comedy while dead is even harder.

[dogbyte12]

It is not like Al-Quaida can't swing for a digital camera. The fact that Osama hasn't given a video tape is evidence to me that he is deader than Elvis.

The propoganda value of him going on tape, saying neener neener neener basically would be spectacular for his movement. He could film the tape in a bare room with white walls, sealed off so there is no clue on the tape as to where it's being filmed, and talk on for hours about anything in the world he wants to say. After 9-11, any radical muslim in the world would watch and listen with glued eyes. He hasn't. He is dead. Occam's razor.

[hankbrown]

But he can't show up on video if he has changed his appearance; maybe sex change surgery.

[Conspiracy Guy]

Yeah they keep asking if one of the hogs is dead and where all the squealing is coming from. The hogs just stare at him.

[FairOpinion]

U.S. stocks pare losses on bin Laden rumor
Reuters, 08.20.03, 11:51 AM ET
http://www.forbes.com/markets/newswire/2003/08/20/rtr1062302.html


NEW YORK, Aug 20 (Reuters) - U.S. stocks pared losses in late morning on Wednesday, driven higher on rumors that U.S. forces had captured al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden.

However, a U.S. official who asked not to be identified told Reuters it was "absolutely not true" that bin Laden had been captured.

"I think the market was improving on a rumor that we caught bin Laden again, which makes it like an even 25 times that we have caught him so far," said Craig Cummings, a partner at Cantor Fitzgerald, noting the rumor has spread through market several times this year.

Trading on the New York Stock Exchange was light, which may have exaggerated the effects of the rumor on the market, traders said.

[Conspiracy Guy]

Pigs won't eat just anything.