Posted on 08/14/2003 5:50:38 AM PDT by RJCogburn
With 12 million Americans tuning in daily, controversial syndicated radio-show host Laura Schlessinger — known to all as "Dr. Laura" — is arguably the best-known Orthodox Jew in the United States.
Rather, she was.
In a shocking if little-noticed revelation, Schlessinger — who very publicly converted to Judaism five years ago — opened "The Dr. Laura Schlessinger Program" on August 5 with the confession that she will no longer practice Judaism. Although Schlessinger said she still "considers" herself Jewish, "My identifying with this entity and my fulfilling the rituals, etc., of the entity — that has ended."
And with that, Orthodox Judaism lost its loudest mouthpiece and its most prominent "rabbi," as it were, with the largest American pulpit — with the exception of, perhaps, presidential candidate Joseph Lieberman.
Syndicated nationally since 1994, Schlessinger has won over listeners with her hard-edged advice and razor-sharp tongue. Yet her brash style, not to mention her espousal of a strict "moral health" code — including controversial condemnations of homosexuality as "a biological error" — put her at odds with wide swaths of the Jewish community. Many found her moralist, black-and-white, you're-with-me-or- against-me stance to be more representative of Evangelical Christians than of Jews, who were often among her most outspoken critics.
Nonetheless, even Schlessinger's detractors were shocked by the news. "I can't tell you how significant this is," said fellow Jewish media star and "Kosher Sex" author Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, who has sparred with Schlessinger over her comments on homosexuality. "Dr. Laura always equated her morals and ethics with Jewish morals and ethics. That placed the American Jewish community in a real fix; on the one hand, she made Judaism very popular, on the other, she made it vilified and hated by many people."
"I think Judaism is better off not being saddled and directly associated with Dr. Laura's means," he said, adding, "although she is still a Jew."
Schlessinger's office said she was unavailable for comment.
Schlessinger began her August 5 program by noting that, prior to each broadcast, she spends an hour reading faxes from fans and listeners. "By and large the faxes from Christians have been very loving, very supportive," she said. "From my own religion, I have either gotten nothing, which is 99% of it, or two of the nastiest letters I have gotten in a long time. I guess that's my point — I don't get much back. Not much warmth coming back."
Schlessinger even hinted at a possible turn to Christianity — a move that, radio insiders say, would elevate her career far beyond the 300 stations that currently syndicate her show. "I have envied all my Christian friends who really, universally, deeply feel loved by God," she said. "They use the name Jesus when they refer to God... that was a mystery, being connected to God."
In her 25 years on radio, Schlessinger said she was moved "time and time again" by listeners who wrote and described that they had "joined a church, felt loved by God and that was my anchor."
Michael Medved, a conservative, nationally syndicated, radio talk-show host, celebrated the Sabbath with Schlessinger about a year ago. "We had talked about having Shabbat again," he said. When he heard of Schlessinger's defection, "My first response was to pick up the phone and try and expedite [the visit]."
"I think it's a shame," he said. "Though, of course, she was controversial in some eyes, she is one of the most admired women in America. Having the most admired woman in America speak joyously about Passover, Shabbat and Jewish lifestyle events — all of that was quite wonderful."
Of her conversion to Judaism, Schlessinger said, "I felt that I was putting out a tremendous amount toward that mission, that end, and not feeling return, not feeling connected, not feeling that inspired. Trust me, I've talked to rabbis, I've read, I've prayed, I've agonized and I came to this place anyway — which is not exactly back to the beginning, but more in that direction than not."
"Was Laura naive to think, 'gosh, I'll be the queen of the Jews'? Yes, she was naive," said Medved. "Part of that comes from not growing up in the Jewish community. It's so rare to find a celebrity embrace of Jewish religiosity of any kind, I can see why Laura would think her very public embrace would have led to a more enthusiastic reaction. But given all the crosscurrents and controversies that divide our community, I can see why that expectation was wrong."
In 2001, despite the controversy surrounding her, the National Council of Young Israel honored Schlessinger for her "traditional American values." Rabbi Pesach Lerner, the executive director of Young Israel, was surprised by Schlessinger's defection but declined to comment on it.
Born to a Jewish father and an Italian Catholic mother, Schlessinger was raised in Brooklyn in a home that was without religion. Approximately 10 years ago, prompted by a question from her son during a viewing of a Holocaust documentary, Schlessinger, 56, began exploring her Jewish roots.
Yet last week's revelation was far from the first time Schlessinger has been wracked with religious doubts. Lacking a religious background, she has spent a lifetime searching for that missing something, and "each thing I tried left me feeling empty," she told Philadelphia's Inside magazine in 1998. Having already undergone a Conservative conversion in 1997, after a debacle with the Jewish Federation of Greater Dallas — a now-legendary affair in which she allegedly rejected three hotel suites, wouldn't ride in taxis and offended the entire audience at a $500 plate fundraiser — Schlessinger was tempted to give up on Judaism completely, but decided to undergo an Orthodox conversion instead.
"A large part of me wanted to make a statement after that experience, to stand even taller about Jewish values," she told the Jewish Telegraphic Agency in 2001. "Besides, if you don't have an Orthodox conversion, you can't get buried in Israel. I want to be close to ground zero."
Rabbi Reuven Bulka, a fellow radio host who presided over Schlessinger's Orthodox conversion, said he was "stunned" by his friend's 180-degree turn. "It didn't make my day, shall we say."
"She obviously has a tremendous impact," said the congregational rabbi from Ottawa, Ont. "When she went through the evolutionary stage of her journey, a lot of people were inspired by her own excitement about it. I can't tell you I know 100 people who became Sabbath observant because of it, but certainly it was a feel-good message for a lot of people. That these feel-good messages won't be coming anymore is certainly a loss."
Other Jews within earshot are far from sad to see her go. "I don't think this is any great loss to the Jewish universe," said Susan Weidman Schneider, the executive editor of Lilith magazine. "I don't think she was a particularly effective or useful spokesperson. She doubtless alienated more people than she drew toward Judaism."
"So, let her say she's no longer a practicing Jew," she added. "Let her be just a garden variety, anti-choice conservative."
"I still see myself as a Jew," Schlessinger said on the air last week. "But the spiritual journey and that direction, as hardcore as I was at it, just didn't fulfill something in me that I needed."
"All I know is, in my experiences with her — which have been considerable — I haven't known her to do anything less than 100%," Bulka said. "Anything she did, she did fully. The scary thing is if she said she's leaving, it's very forboding."
"I thought she was a tough little lady — I didn't think she'd chicken out so easily," said Rabbi Isaac Levy, the chairman of Jews for Morality, who has staunchly supported Schlessinger's conservative agenda. "She's gotten a couple of kicks in the chin and she's succumbed to it."
"It seems incredible that an ethicist and moralist of her standing would invoke such shallow arguments," said Boteach, who was en route to an appearance on the titillating syndicated television show "Blind Date." "I never got great applause for my work from the Jewish community — but my people are my people, whether they love or hate me."
She has a 'Doctorate' in Exercise Kineseology(sp), not in Psychology or Counseling. So right from the git go I figured she was blowing smoke up a lot of peoples skirts. Also, she has seemed, IMHO, to be a very abusive person on her radio show. People calling her are in very delicate situations emotionally, and I think she takes advantage of that to promote her position.
Her spiritual relationships are no business of mine or anyone elses.
But I will bet $$ to donuts...she is gonna let her listeners know what she gloms onto as her next 'religion.'
Lillith magazine is an extreme feminist publication. It's not even representative of liberal Jews.
You know, I've heard so many calls like the one you posted that I really wasn't sure. . .
"Gosh, Dr. Laura, he only beats me when he drinks, and he only drinks because he loves me so much and I make him crazy. What can I do to please him so he won't beat me anymore?"
And that was a real call. So help me, there are times when I think those calls are set up, and that program is a radio version of Springer.
Just in it for the jokes, huh?
I too agree with her moral stands on the needs of children. And I am sure her charity does good.
That said, she has come to everything through unjust and bitter means, and has left hundreds of unhappy and used people in her wake. I know this secondhand, and a close secondhand.
She has not practiced what she has preached, nor does she do the helpful thing of telling a caller who is cheating on a spouse, abandoning kids, pregnant before marriage, sleeping with her boss, marrying outside of her religion, dumping a parent, having an affair with a married man at work, or posing for nude photos for another boss, that she knows how hard it must be because she has been there. Do the right thing rings hollow when you can't say "I did the wrong thing once; I know what I am talking about. The right thing is better."
She lies on her radio show by her own "admission." One time she said she never worked while her child was little and not in school, but she has also repeated a story of how when she was a therapist, her husband would bring in her baby to nurse and she would hear his cries and have a milk letdown in her therapy session.
She does give rather harsh assignments to her callers, telling one not long ago that he should not marry at 22 to his high school sweetheart because he was "too young" and "statistics" don't bode well for his marriage and he should wait 6 more years. I know countless couples, now young and old, who married young, especially religious couples, and who have had wonderful marriages and happy families.
She tends not to "keep" friends; those who are most useful to her in whatever current "phase" her life is in feel that they are her friends and go out of their way to help her goal, but once it is reached, they either never hear from her again (she has outgrown them) or they find that they have been "taken" and used in some way. I hate to say that but it is a pattern repeated often enough.
Her husband was always there for that child but "I am my child's mom" was not, and seldom went to his elementary school parent meetings, etc.
She fell in love with Judaism and then that was not enough for her. Orthodoxy became the next holy grail for her. She even made her husband convert after he told her he would never do so. That poor man. Also, she converted so fast that my head spun. I asked a Chassidic Rabbi (in the same denomination as the one who converted her) I know how she could have converted to Orthodox Judaism so fast; he rubbed his thumb against the tip of his other fingers.
She thinks that it had something to do with Judaism that she didn't receive that warmth from people? It may have been her own behavior and nothing to do with our religion. I too am a politically conservative (Conservative) Jew and I know how hard it is to hold that position in an extended family of liberals with Lieberman kippahs on, etc. but if you really believe in your conservative values, it gives you the strength of being sure you are right and that the libs are misguided, if lovable, family members. I can handle it; why can't she?
All of you wonderful Christians who think that Dr. L is on her way to the ultimate belief may not be right. I can understand you thinking she has been on the spiritual trail and is now coming to the correct one. If that's true, that's wonderful. Judaism believes that there are many right ways to G-d for all the world's people. However, BE CAREFUL. She may just be going through a phase in order to prove HER superiority. She may toss Jesus out with the next bathwater too.
I guess she is enjoying that bacon again.
What are you talking about?
It is true that so many reform (the vast majority) Jews are harsh with practicing Jews. They feel a sort of guilt that their religiousness is limited to their breakfast choice and twice-a-year temple visits.
But if you are nice and loving and NOT superior-acting, you can through jokes and love bring some people around to adding a bit more spirituality to their lives. I do it.
Yes. And some "slipups" just never would happen to most people. I was thinking that yesterday when reading that Cruz Bustamente (leut. governor and on the ballot for gov in CA) "slipped up" when he said the N word in a speech to black Californians a few years ago. I am sorry; that couldn't happen to me. Since I don't use that word, it couldn't "slip out."
Likewise with Dr. Laura posing gynecologically for her boyfriend/boss/start in radio. I can't say "whoops, I made a youthful mistake like that" because I DIDN'T and WOULDN'T.
In one Jewish sect there is such a thing.
In Judaism, sexuality, as eating, has rules in order to elevate it to holiness and separate the way we eat and make love from the way animals stuff themselves and mate.
Months. They could not tell whether she had been murdered or died of natural causes, it had been so long.
Recently she advised a caller not to cut all ties with a badly behaving mom but to call her once a month or so to make sure she was OK and not dead, ha ha ha. She actually laughed. I hope to heck that show was a old, taped one from two years ago.
"Father, I have a feeling Dr. Smith converted to Judaism just for the jokes!"
"And this offfends you as a Jew, my son?"
"No, this offends me as a comedian!" -- Jerry Seinfeld
"Father, I have a feeling Dr. Smith converted to Judaism just for the jokes!"
"And this offfends you as a Jew, my son?"
"No, this offends me as a comedian!" -- Jerry Seinfeld
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