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It is well worth the visit. Some of the retired members of the CG Warrants Association make a couple of visits to his grave every year to take care of any work that needs done.

As for visiting, I sometimes go out for the actual ceremony, but I prefer visiting when there isn't a crowd...seems more real that way.

About your Dad and uncle. In some ways I don't think your Father got nearly as wound up over comments trashing the Purple Heart as the rest of you did. Many Purple Heart holders have real mixed emotions about that medal; not the least of which is a level of guilt. When they pin that medal on your pillow you're thinking about your friends who's Purple Heart will be given to their wife or parents; wondering why them and not you, if there was something you didn't do, etc.

Of all the decorations you "earn", the Purple Heart is the great equalizer...it's the same for a general/admiral, a private/seaman...and also the least understood by civilians.

When your uncle made stupid comments about the Purple Heart, not unlike some of the stupid comments I'm seeing on this thread, your father didn't think to himself, "I earned that medal you arse." He was thinking, "Why Ed and not me. He earned it, did I?"

In some ways I don't think your Father got nearly as wound up over comments trashing the Purple Heart as the rest of you did. Many Purple Heart holders have real mixed emotions about that medal; not the least of which is a level of guilt.

I know that's very common, but it really doesn't describe my dad. He was truly insulted by the remarks. He knew he earned it - and he did - he didn't get evac for eight hours, and took a lot of shrapnel just lying there...he lost part of his hearing, and lived with shrapnel inching ever nearer his spine his entire life, with the constant threat of permanent paralysis.

He also knew that he was one of the fortunate ones, and I know he had a lot of respect and appreciation for those who served with him, especially for those who didn't make it home (his own first cousin and best friend being one)...he definitely did not see himself as any kind of hero, but he honestly didn't suffer from guilt. And I'm glad he didn't, because survivor's guilt doesn't really benefit anyone.

I guess he just wasn't built that way.

He was also different from other Iwo vets in that he was a talker - a lot of guys didn't speak of it for the rest of their lives, but my dad really wanted us to understand what kind of place it was.

Sadly, I didn't fully understand it until he was gone.