"Oh, Milkbone, lovely Milkbone,
you are the best by far!
In the land of doggie snacks
you are my shining star!
I love to hold you 'tween my paws
and sniff your meaty savor.
And when I sink my teeth in you
I love your crunchy flavor!
Oh, Milkbone, lovely Milkbone,
for you I'll beg and whine
until they open up that box
and I begin to dine!
How many Milkbones I have had
there simply is no telling.
They make my teeth all sparkly clean
and keep my breath from smelling!
Oh, Milkbone, lovely Milkbone,
I'm crazy, so it seems.
'Cause everytime I sleep at night
I chase you in my dreams!
I'll have to have my Milkbones
every day until I die
and then I'll have more Milkbones
in my home beyond the sky.
So Milkbone, lovely Milkbone,
no other snack can beat you.
That's why I wrote this, just to say:
it's such a treat to eat you!"
I Love my master; Thus I perfume myself with This long-rotten mouse. I lie belly-up In the sunshine, happier than You ever will be ... I sound the alarm! Paper boy--come to kill us all-- Look! Look! Look! Look! Look! ... I sound the alarm! Garbage man--come to kill us all-- Look! Look! Look! Look! Look! How do I love thee? The ways are numberless as My hairs on the rug. I sound the alarm! Mail carrier--come to kill us all-- Look! Look! Look! Look! Look! My human is home! I am so ecstatic I have Made a puddle I sound the alarm! Gardener--come to kill us all-- Look! Look! Look! Look! Look! I Hate my choke chain-- Look, world, they strangle me! Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack! Sleeping here, my chin On your foot--no greater bliss--well, Maybe catching mice Look in my eyes and Deny it. No human could Love you as much I do ... Dig under fence--why? Because it's there. Because it's There. Because it's there. I am your best friend, Now, always, and especially When you are eating. ...