Does your cousin know Kevin Cronin? You mean RIO.
Also known as GIB.
My cousin's husband was flying Tomcats in the '70s. He is now a Captain in Navy, and has lots of aircraft under his command.
The story about the flaps probably was true, because it was late in the Carter administration or very early in the Reagan years (when the military was still recovering from the disasterous years prior to Reagan).