Boy, you people are really gonna be disillusioned when you find out that your leaders have been lying about the virgins and you stupid ragheads have been blowing yourselves up for nothing...
They should have never listened to Bin Laden...
The US military finally hunts down and kills Osama Bin Laden. Osama is lifted to the pearly gates.
There, he is greeted by George Washington. "How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" yells Washington, slapping Osama in the face.
Patrick Henry comes up from behind. "You wanted to end the Americans' liberty, so they gave you death!" Henry punches Osama on the nose.
James Madison comes up next, and says "This is why I allowed the Federal government to provide for the common defense!" He drops a large weight on Osama's knee.
Osama is subject to similar beatings from John Randolph of Roanoke, James Monroe, and 65 other American patriots.
As he writhes on the ground, Thomas Jefferson picks him up to hurl him back toward the gate where he is to be judged. As Osama awaits his journey to his final very hot destination, he screams "this is not what I was promised!"
An angel replies "I told you if you died attacking America there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in Heaven. What the heck did you think I said?"