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Unread Bestsellers (what bestseller can you not get through?)
The Word Spy ^ | Jan, 2003

Posted on 02/11/2003 9:49:20 PM PST by Utah Girl

unread bestseller

(UN.red best.sel.ur) n. A book that many people purchase but few read in its entirety.

Example Citation:
There's the National Book Critics Circle Awards, another nice "high-culture" opportunity for Jonathan Franzen, author of jumbo unread bestseller The Corrections. —Alexandra Jacobs, "The Eight-Day Week," New York Observer, March 11, 2002

Backgrounder:
Here's my all-time Top 10 unread bestsellers list:

The Bible
A Brief History of Time, Stephen Hawking
The Satanic Verses, Salman Rushdie
The Name of the Rose, Umberto Eco
The Closing of the American Mind, Allan Bloom
Doctor Zhivago, Boris Pasternak
Gravity's Rainbow, Thomas Pynchon
The Bell Curve, Charles Murray and Richard Herrnstein
The End of History, Francis Fukuyama
Beowulf, Seamus Heaney (trans.)

Earliest Citation:

A 500-page novel set in a 14th-century monastery and written by an Italian professor of semiotics is hardly the stuff of conventional best sellers. But "The Name of the Rose," by Umberto Eco, has proven to be just that. ...

A few cynical observers suspect that snob appeal has played a considerable role in the book's rise. Says Howard Kaminsky, president of Warner Books, which bought the paperback rights for $550,000: "Every year there is one great unread best seller. A lot of people who will buy the book will never read it." It serves, he has said, as a "passport" to intellectual respectability. "It doesn't hurt to be seen carrying a copy at the Museum of Modern Art. It hints you've got something more in your mind than getting picked up."
~~~—Alexandre Still, "Miracle of the Rose," Newsweek, September 26, 1983



TOPICS: Culture/Society; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS:
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To: Utah Girl
I enjoyed the Bible, the Bell Curve and A Brief History of Time, although I don't pretend to understand half of what Hawking is talking about. I can't get through a Tale of Two Cities or Shakespeare. In Shakespeare, the prose is so archaic I can't understand it.

Panthos (enters): "Alark, a staveth dost thou pass?"
Peretinitus (already there): "Aye, aye, and a knavest staveth to the end!"
Bursitus (falling from the ceiling): Tis well, tis well."

Dittoes for Atlas Shrugged. I never even got far enough to find out who is John Galt? I assumed he was the rich guy who made the guy that tried to bankrupt the railroad in Mexico do it, and that he was the force behind the force, but by the time people had looked at each other mockingly for about the 30,000th time, I didn't really care who John Galt was.

I made it through Moby Dick until the 600 page essay on whale types. That kind of slowed down the plot.

I usually enjoy Tom Wolfe, but I just couldn't get into A Man in Full. I'm sure that's my shortcoming, not his. A lot of Freeps love it.

90% of college textbooks are total garbage. From my original college days, I kept "History of Art".

On the super lame-o books that were really popular until people figured out how incredibly stupid they are, I put Jonathan Livingston Seagull and Watership Down.

And don't forget, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, the Crucible, and all the other books they force down your throat in high school english today.

Jim Fixx dying of a heart attack after writing about how running would make us live forever was kind of a bummer.

I had to read about 3/4 of the Fire Protection Handbook by NFPA for a promotional test. It's several thousand pages about things like chemicals used in semi-conductor processing. That hurt, but I made the promotion, and for several years I could quote the exact dimensions of the machine used for the Steiner tunnel test.

Stephen King could write a good novel if someone would walk in and tell him, you know, most books have this thing called a plot. After he's finished telling the story, he writes another 500 pages for no particular reason.

All the Joe Weider body-building books are amazing. These guys get built like that, and NONE of them uses steroids (btw, that was sarcasm).

You can count on one thing with almost any book written by a sports figure. The book wasn't really written by the sports figure. Anybody believe Shaquille O'Neal has ever even read a book?

21 posted on 02/11/2003 10:30:39 PM PST by Richard Kimball
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To: BigBobber
How about John Grisham's new novel, More Lawyer Crap?
22 posted on 02/11/2003 10:31:46 PM PST by Richard Kimball
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To: Utah Girl
This site might be of help for classics -

http://www.rinkworks.com/bookaminute/classics.shtml

;)

Ryle

23 posted on 02/11/2003 10:33:41 PM PST by Ryle
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To: Bernard Marx
Anything by Clancy.
24 posted on 02/11/2003 10:35:56 PM PST by Travis McGee (----- www.EnemiesForeignAndDomestic.com -----)
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To: stylin19a
Speaking of shrugged shoulders, it's "Atlas Shrugged" for me

I'm on about page 50. I can tell it's going to be a long haul.

I suspect worth it though.

25 posted on 02/11/2003 10:37:05 PM PST by lizma
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To: Utah Girl
Maybe not a best seller, but certainly a "required reading" item for political-types: Alexis de Toqueville. I'm not sure I even spelled it properly, but those were the driest books I ever encountered. Of course, I was in college, and not so concerned about political affairs, so maybe I'd enjoy them more now...I was just so bored then I cannot bring myself to embark upon that journey to boredom again.
26 posted on 02/11/2003 10:37:25 PM PST by I'm ALL Right!
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To: firebrand
ping
27 posted on 02/11/2003 10:38:08 PM PST by nutmeg (Liberate Iraq - Support Our Troops!)
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To: Richard Kimball; ConservativeLawyer; Abundy
How about John Grisham's new novel, "More Lawyer Crap"?

ROTFLMAO! So TRUE!!

28 posted on 02/11/2003 10:38:56 PM PST by Travis McGee (----- www.EnemiesForeignAndDomestic.com -----)
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To: Utah Girl
"Naked Lunch" by William Burroughs is the most unspeakably awful book ever written.

I never was able to finish even part of a page.

Only a perverted psychopath could read it.

29 posted on 02/11/2003 10:41:06 PM PST by Allan
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To: Utah Girl
I gave up halfway through Life of Pi by Yann Martel.

On the other hand, I loved The Corrections as well as Pears' novels, including The Corrections and Dream of Scipio.

Some of my latest favorites have been The Piano Tuner by Daniel Mason, Paradise Alley by Kevin Baker, and The Crimson Petal and the White by Michael Faber. Also Latitudes of Melt by Joan Clark. Anyway, good reading.

30 posted on 02/11/2003 10:42:21 PM PST by JoeFromCA
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To: lizma
Why punish yourself? Try something more exciting and topical. You can read the half I posted right here.


31 posted on 02/11/2003 10:44:23 PM PST by Travis McGee (----- www.EnemiesForeignAndDomestic.com -----)
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To: stylin19a
Speaking of shrugged shoulders, it's "Atlas Shrugged" for me

I'm on about page 100. I can tell it's going to be a long haul.

I suspect worth it though. Maybe.

32 posted on 02/11/2003 10:44:24 PM PST by lizma
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To: martin_fierro
I bought Red Rabbit, also. What a bore! I never read more that 100 pages and I don't very often give up on a book.
33 posted on 02/11/2003 10:45:31 PM PST by Eva
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To: fromnovascotia
Classics vs. best-sellers. It's sad you have to point it out.
34 posted on 02/11/2003 10:47:40 PM PST by Bernard Marx
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To: Allan
Or write it.
35 posted on 02/11/2003 10:50:57 PM PST by Bonaparte
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To: Utah Girl
Rushdie is way over-rated IMHO. Satanic Verses was just unreadable dreck as far as I could see. I couldn't get through more than a few dozen pages of it. I feel the same way about everything by Pynchon. Life is too short for that crap, and there are so many fascinating things to learn. Why waste time trying to penetrate the mind of an eccentric recluse with a penchant for indecipherable versifying?
36 posted on 02/11/2003 10:52:39 PM PST by beckett
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To: chookter
"Vineland" by Thomas Pynchon.

Me too. Luckily, I bought it at a garage sale. Now some poor soul probably bought it at Goodwill after I gave it up.

A couple of Martin Amis novels are on the list. I just cannot get into him. Or Tolkien either, for that matter.

37 posted on 02/11/2003 10:53:05 PM PST by TheFilter (A reaction beats actually getting smallpox!)
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To: Utah Girl
"Atlas Shrugged" is one book I can not get through. Love to read and until tonight ( reading the posts ) I thought that I was the only one who did not love this book.
38 posted on 02/11/2003 10:53:51 PM PST by Irish Eyes
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To: lizma
I enjoyed "Atlas Shrugged" but when it came to Galts speech I felt it could have been wrapped up in a couple of pages. I started skipping ahead 20 pages at a time just to see where it would end. I think the speech was around 60 or so pages if I remember correctly. Way overblown.
39 posted on 02/11/2003 10:56:02 PM PST by amstaff1
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To: martin_fierro
I've watched this happen with several best-selling authors: Alistair McLean and Stephen King, to mention a couple. When the Big Bucks start pouring in they forget the critical importance of Editors and let their prose slop into self-indulgent wordy overkill. McLean's early works were the tightest, tautest action thrillers I've ever read. But after the Hollywood success of "Ice Station Zebra" and a couple of others, he went completely to hell. King retains the old spark at times but nothing compares with his first 3-4 novels.
40 posted on 02/11/2003 10:57:50 PM PST by Bernard Marx
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