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To: RonF
Here's my solution. Don't buy the clothes. Don't buy the makeup. Don't buy the CD's. Don't take her to those movies. Don't buy the magazines. Don't let her watch those TV shows.

That's only part of the solution. Once she's away from your house she may still have the desire to immerse herself in this sub-culture.

This problem is a problem of the heart. Restricting what we see on TV or in advertisements seems like a really simple thing to do but it doesn't address the issues beneath the surface: these girls have no sense of self worth, and it's usually because they have no father figure in their life to help them feel good about themselves. Mothers can only do so much to complete the picture for a girl when she is growing up. Girls need the love and acceptance from fathers to keep out of this kind of trouble.

47 posted on 01/27/2003 9:59:00 AM PST by webstersII
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To: webstersII
"That's only part of the solution. Once she's away from your house she may still have the desire to immerse herself in this sub-culture."

That's why I couple my don'ts with do's: get your daughter involved in something positive, where she gets her self-esteem the right way, by earning it. Then provide positive reinforcement. If she's an athlete, go to the games and talk about them afterwards. If she's in music, go to the concerts. If she's in Scouts, be a leader. If she's on the newspaper staff, read it and comment on the stories.

Then set an example. Don't read People magazine yourself. If you're a mother, don't dress like a teenage-tart wannabe. Insist on good grades; reward them, and withold privileges if they don't appear. Make sure that she's not distracted by TV during study hours, even if that means you can't watch it yourself.

Despite the existence of home-schooling, you can't completely close off your child from popular culture. But by example, you can show that it has no place in your home and should have no place in hers. Then she'll understand it's worth, and if she indulges herself in it some when she's out of sight, at least she's properly grounded.

96 posted on 01/27/2003 11:26:02 AM PST by RonF
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