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ER.... um.... hmmm Let's say... You get really friendly one day and you meet someone and open your wallet and you say here start taking money out. At the beginning that's what you want to give them the money. Then after you realize that you hadn't paid rent you say... , Well I must be going and you are still holding open your wallet. At what point of this process is this persons manners supposed to kick in? I think if you snap the wallet shut and push them away and say you have enough stop and you start to walk away. Yes if it continues after that I agree. But I do not think you can say "gee he kept the motion of reaching for my money in my wallet after I told him I should go." And then use the period of time after it was over to negate you willing participation of giving them the money to begin with. Does this makes sense? Or am I off here? You thoughts?

Walkingfeather I get what you are trying to say but when a rape is occurring it is more akin to someone opening their wallet and letting the person have some money and then the person taking the money, well he starts getting crazy, his eyes bulge out and the generous person starts fearing the person taking the money may have a gun in their pocket - the generous person figures maybe they can talk themselves out of the situation without the person who is taking the money going more nutso - they figure that if they just scream and run with the wallet that the crazy man might do more than 'just' take their money, so they try to 'reason' with him first....can you imagine this type of situation? Have you ever run across someone strange and try to back away from them slowly because you feared any sudden moves might make them worse?

they figure that if they just scream and run with the wallet that the crazy man might do more than 'just' take their money,

This doesn't even make sense. If walking out of the room could make this crazy lust starved criminal throw me to the floor, beat and rape me why would I even try to say no? Wouldn't the crazy guy be just as crazy if I simply refused?

There are all kinds of situations out there. A small percentage of guys are evil, crazy rapists and you are probably screwed if you ever find yourself alone with one.

Then you've got the dating couple where the guy is thinking "she let me kiss her, but not touch her breast; then she let me touch her breast but not get under her clothes; then she let me get under her top but not her pants"...we've got this progression thing going on. If she is meanwhile thinking suddenly as he tries to get into her pants "ohmigosh he's crazy rapist man and now I can't say anything or he'll beat me and rape me anyway" this is a ludicrous, unnecessary situation. The guy isn't evil, he's simply doing what she has taught him is ok behavior with her. And if this actually happens, she isn't evil either. But it is a terrible misunderstanding.

And then we have the "everybody is drunk and no one quite knows what happened thing" where all the drunk people are to blame.

I've been in two precarious situations. One was entirely my doing. I deliberately pursued the situation thinking I could control it. Luckily for me, the guy was decent. And had he not been, I would have been responsible for placing my person in harms way. I learned that lesson quickly.

In the second, I was much less responsible for my situation and I got rescued. Lucky, because that guy certainly seemed like crazy rapist man, emphasis on the crazy.