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That reminds me of a joke (not to segue too far off).

A traveller was walking through the streets of Belfast early in the morning after a long night at the pub. Inadvertently, he steps into an alley, and is grabbed from behind, feeling the blade of a knife pressed at his neck.

"Be ye Catholic, or be ye Protestant, mate?", an unseen voice hissed into his ear.

"Crap", the guy thought. "If I say Catholic, then this guy will cut my throat, because he'll be Protestant, if I say Protestant, he'll cut my throat because hes Catholic. This is a no-win for me without knowing more."

All of a sudden, inspiration hits and he says "neither one. I'm jewish".

With that, he hears the voice chuckle and say "Jesus, Mary and Joseph - I must be the luckiest Muslim in all Belfast".

Three Irishmen stumble out of the pub, well after closing time. On the walk home they come across a graveyard, and start reading the names on the stones. The one says, "Look at this, Gerald O'Connor, lived to be 84 years old, God bless him."

The second says, "I've got that beat, here's Patrick Clancy, 97 years, can you believe it?"

The third says, "That's nothing. Here's one here who lived to be 143."

"What's his name?," the others ask. "Miles. From Dublin."