Speaking of *ugly*??
Listen to this, kiddo.
Yesterday I'm heading to a small country town 25 miles away on a liesurely drive in my xmas gift, OK?
I'm on a four lane divided highway, it's sunny & clear, the traffic's light to nonexitant.
Alongside me pulls up a couple of *dudes* in a jet-black Ford, "Lightning" with lightly tinted windows.
They wanted to race me!
Naturally, I had at that time a paltry 330 miles on the car & so I'm reluctant, right?
Well they pull ahead of me under rapid acceleration -- in the left lane.
I try to pull up next to 'em in the right lane to give 'em the ol' thumbs-up (~the truck was pretty, alright...) but, these two clowns will have none of that, & decide to bolt, again.
Well I accelerate too; but, there's *one* car acting as a *pick* in my lane; so, I have to let-up and go around the thing.
By this time that truck was 500ft ahead; so?
I put the *spurs* to the *xmas* gift & the thing launches forward as if it were a cruise missile outa hell.
I swear before the Almighty I reeled the guy in in about 3 seconds and now, I am right *on* this guy's bumper.
So I steer into the empty right lane, pull up to the cab & shoot the guy a *howdy* wave. (~their eyes were as big as bowling balls; the Gospel's truth!)
At that instant I could've just kept on going & passed these guys with the tremendous momentum I was carrying, but, I look at the heads-up display & it's reading, "155."
Nearly crapping in my drawers?
I immediately let-off the accelerator & drop like a rock behind these two; while, they continued on hell bent for election.
OK?
Then, *something* very strange happened.
Something I swear I've *never* witnessed before in my entire lifetime of racing (on public roads).
Under this guy's truck a stream of black/white smoke starts trailing out.
At first slowly but quickly increasing & then *pouring* into a huge, spiraling vapor-trail.
Then?
A gigantic ball of flames explodes from under the thing & crap goes flying *everywhere*.
By now I've a *bird's eye view* of the whole episode going down, & from nice, safe distance of roughly 500 feet.
This, "Lightning" had got *grounded* to earth, Mud.
The Eaton Supercharged 330c/in engine in that thing let go with a fury & blew into a thousand pieces.
I've only seen that kind of spectacle happen while watching a NASCAR race, whenever one of the race engines let go &, "frag."
The truck *coasts* onto the spacious right-side service lane & comes to a stop.
I continued down the road a few miles; but, then thought I should turn around to render assistance.
I mean, we're in the middle of *nowhere* my man, right?
I pull up & park in front of the parked truck with its hood wide open & a *puddle* of oil, coolant & *things* Ford under the thing.
Mud?
It was a 17 year old kid & his buddy.
I ask the big kid (driver), "So young man, just whose truck is this, anyway?"
He sheepishly looks at me & quietly says -- you guessed it -- "My Dad's."
Then the kid asks me if I know what happened?
I say, "Yea, I know. You dropped the bottom outa that motor, Son. Blew it to Kingdom Come. You're gonna be needing a *new* engine, kid. What happened to *this* Ford cannot be repaired." (~& it can't...)
This hulking 6'2" 17 year old farm kid starts balling like a newborn baby right there & then; &, I?
Well Mud?
My elation (~after having literally left this *bad ass* Ford laying on the side of the highway, just so much roadkill) turned 180o from giddy joy, to total bummer.
I could *really* feel this kid's pain.
Felt like crap.
Must be getting soft, old, or *both*, huh?
...when whippin' the crap outa a Ford leaves me feelin' like that.
That's 'cuz you figgered out he wasn't a Lib'ral...I NEVER feel like crap after whuppin' a Lib'ral's arse!!
Now quit pickin' on kids one-third yer age, dude...MUD
Landru, you're deft use of words is unique & one-of-a-kind.
I can see why an Irish journalist would welcome your advice.
155, eh?! You really get that 'vette up to 155 on those Indianny back roads? When I was in Montana a few years back, I got the rental up to 120 on a straight-away where there was no speed limit, but I ain'tr never gone 155 anywhere.
"Nearly crapping in my drawers? I immediately let-off the accelerator & drop like a rock behind these two; while, they continued on hell bent for election. OK? Then, *something* very strange happened. Something I swear I've *never* witnessed before in my entire lifetime of racing (on public roads). Under this guy's truck a stream of black/white smoke starts trailing out. At first slowly but quickly increasing & then *pouring* into a huge, spiraling vapor-trail. Then? A gigantic ball of flames explodes from under the thing & crap goes flying *everywhere*.
"By now I've a *bird's eye view* of the whole episode going down, & from nice, safe distance of roughly 500 feet. This, "Lightning" had got *grounded* to earth, Mud. The Eaton Supercharged 330c/in engine in that thing let go with a fury & blew into a thousand pieces. I've only seen that kind of spectacle happen while watching a NASCAR race, whenever one of the race engines let go &, "frag." The truck *coasts* onto the spacious right-side service lane & comes to a stop. I continued down the road a few miles; but, then thought I should turn around to render assistance. I mean, we're in the middle of *nowhere* my man, right? I pull up & park in front of the parked truck with its hood wide open & a *puddle* of oil, coolant & *things* Ford under the thing. Mud? It was a 17 year old kid & his buddy. I ask the big kid (driver), "So young man, just whose truck is this, anyway?" He sheepishly looks at me & quietly says -- you guessed it -- "My Dad's." Then the kid asks me if I know what happened? I say, "Yea, I know. You dropped the bottom outa that motor, Son. Blew it to Kingdom Come. You're gonna be needing a *new* engine, kid. What happened to *this* Ford cannot be repaired." (~& it can't...)
Major bummer...I can't even imagine blowing out the engine in my ol' man's car as a 17-year-old, and I did some purty ornery stuff as a young-un.
"This hulking 6'2" 17 year old farm kid starts balling like a newborn baby right there & then; &, I? Well Mud? My elation (~after having literally left this *bad ass* Ford laying on the side of the highway, just so much roadkill) turned 180o from giddy joy, to total bummer. I could *really* feel this kid's pain. Felt like crap. Must be getting soft, old, or *both*, huh? ...when whippin' the crap outa a Ford leaves me feelin' like that."
BTW...knock on wood, but my Ford's still performing like a champ and I got well over 120,000 miles on it. Reckon it helps that I've got no misconceptions that I'm gonna win any races, though...LOL!!
Great story...MUD