Black XIII: "Common Thread" (SlixMUDZbeachhouse in Nags Head!!)

"SlickWillie FOOLS!!"
(To be sung to Eric Clapton's "BellBottom Blues")

SlickWillie FOOLS, you make US fight...
Right ain't gonna lose this feeling!!
And FReepers shall choose...a rage to ignite...
It shall be 'gainst YOU, Bubba!!!!

Do you wanna help MUD Dethrone Left's Whore?!! Do You?!!
Are ya gonna FReep Slick ev'ry time ya can?!
I dare ya!! DO IT!! 'Cuz...
We can't let Slick git away!!
Right SHALL Indict Left's Sleaze!!
We can't let Clinton Sanction RAPE!!
In their hearts, Libs don't like RAPE!!

Left's all Wrong, but we're all Right!!
OUR Nation's still healthy, Patriots!! Ahh-hmmmm...
RightWing is Strong, and We'll Win the Fight!!
Lib'rals best git usedta LOSIN'!!

Do you wanna help MUD Dethrone Left's Whore?!! Do You?!!
Are ya gonna FReep Slick ev'ry time ya can?!
I dare ya!! DO IT!! 'Cuz...
We can't let Slick git away!!
Truth SHALL Indict Left's Sleaze!!
We can't let Clinton Sanction RAPE!!
In Slick's Cell, RATbi+c# shall be RAPED!!

(Purty jammin' by TheBigMan)

Are ya gonna Help US Win the Culture War?!! Will YOU?!!
Are ya gonna TEACH Libs ev'ry time ya can?!
I dare ya!! DO IT!! 'Cuz...
We can't let Slick git away!!
Right SHALL Indict Left's Sleaze!!
We can't let Clinton Sanction RAPE!!
RATS're DOLTS...but Left's Minds We'll Save!!

SlickWillieFOOLS, tell Slick "Good-Bye!!"
We're surely gonna FReep as "FRiends"...
And when we do, don't act surprised...
When you hear Slick loves his CellMateBuggerin'!! OOOOOOOH!!

FReepers Gonna Help US Win the Culture War!! Are YOU?!!
Are ya gonna FReep Slick ev'ry time ya can?!
I dare ya!! DO IT!! 'Cuz...
We can't let Slick git away!!
Right SHALL Indict Left's Sleaze!!
We can't let Clinton Sanction RAPE!!
Slick's a BUM...Young girls Bill RAPES!!
We Shan't Let RacistWillie Skate!!
RATS, yer dumb...but Slick's a Snake!!

Mudboy Slim

BTW...Bill Clinton Shall Be Dethroned When Leftist RATS Reject His Faux Populism!!

RE-IMPEACH. CONVICT. DETHRONE.
DISBAR. DE-PENSION. DE-LEGITIMIZE.
INDICT. CONVICT. IMPRISON. DISCARD KEY.

Quite Sincerely...MUD (11/20/2002)

"I look at the heads-up display & it's reading, "155."

155, eh?! You really get that 'vette up to 155 on those Indianny back roads? When I was in Montana a few years back, I got the rental up to 120 on a straight-away where there was no speed limit, but I ain'tr never gone 155 anywhere.

"Nearly crapping in my drawers? I immediately let-off the accelerator & drop like a rock behind these two; while, they continued on hell bent for election. OK? Then, *something* very strange happened. Something I swear I've *never* witnessed before in my entire lifetime of racing (on public roads). Under this guy's truck a stream of black/white smoke starts trailing out. At first slowly but quickly increasing & then *pouring* into a huge, spiraling vapor-trail. Then? A gigantic ball of flames explodes from under the thing & crap goes flying *everywhere*.

"By now I've a *bird's eye view* of the whole episode going down, & from nice, safe distance of roughly 500 feet. This, "Lightning" had got *grounded* to earth, Mud. The Eaton Supercharged 330c/in engine in that thing let go with a fury & blew into a thousand pieces. I've only seen that kind of spectacle happen while watching a NASCAR race, whenever one of the race engines let go &, "frag." The truck *coasts* onto the spacious right-side service lane & comes to a stop. I continued down the road a few miles; but, then thought I should turn around to render assistance. I mean, we're in the middle of *nowhere* my man, right? I pull up & park in front of the parked truck with its hood wide open & a *puddle* of oil, coolant & *things* Ford under the thing. Mud? It was a 17 year old kid & his buddy. I ask the big kid (driver), "So young man, just whose truck is this, anyway?" He sheepishly looks at me & quietly says -- you guessed it -- "My Dad's." Then the kid asks me if I know what happened? I say, "Yea, I know. You dropped the bottom outa that motor, Son. Blew it to Kingdom Come. You're gonna be needing a *new* engine, kid. What happened to *this* Ford cannot be repaired." (~& it can't...)

Major bummer...I can't even imagine blowing out the engine in my ol' man's car as a 17-year-old, and I did some purty ornery stuff as a young-un.

"This hulking 6'2" 17 year old farm kid starts balling like a newborn baby right there & then; &, I? Well Mud? My elation (~after having literally left this *bad ass* Ford laying on the side of the highway, just so much roadkill) turned 180o from giddy joy, to total bummer. I could *really* feel this kid's pain. Felt like crap. Must be getting soft, old, or *both*, huh? ...when whippin' the crap outa a Ford leaves me feelin' like that."

BTW...knock on wood, but my Ford's still performing like a champ and I got well over 120,000 miles on it. Reckon it helps that I've got no misconceptions that I'm gonna win any races, though...LOL!!

Great story...MUD

"Slick Willie's Bombed!!"
(To be sung to BB King's "The Thrill is Gone")

The thrill is gone,
Slick Willie's gone away!!
Yes, Bill is gone, Lib'rals,
Slick Murdered Ron Brown, he did!!
You Know Slick's Done US Wrong, Nation,
And it's High Time Slick Willie Paid!!

Yes, Bill, yer done,
Punk ain't gettin' 'way from me,
Right AIN'T Movin' On, Willie,
Yer shrill Medyuh can't help ya stay FRee!!
Although, RATS'll still live on,
It'll be without Slick Willie!!

Yes, Willie's Bombed...
Bill Clinton, he ain't no good!!
Oh, yes Bill has bombed babies,
Says killin' kids is good,
Someday, Slick knows chicks'll shun Slick charms, Ladies...
Just like all Righteous Men do!!

You know I FReep...FReepin' YOU, Willie!!
Right's FRee from yer spell,
Bill, we'll FReep...FReep Fer Justice!!
Right'll FReep you, RapistBill!!
Boy, you know that it's all over,
Slick, I'm gonna FReep you straight to Hell!!

Heh heh heh...Mudboy Slim (01/06/2003)

So you went & resurrected that tale, huh.
Well Mud, there's *more* to the story that can be told now.

Last spring on a beautiful balmy early Sunday morning -- as only they can be on the Mason-Dixon, now just a fond memory as I gaze onto the surrounding Kettle Moraine countryside, lightly dusted with a covering of snow -- I'm cruising over to the Chevy dealer to see what he's got in stock in the way of '04 Corvettes.

From behind comes a jet black Ford F-150 Lightning like a bat outa hell crawling right up my keister. It swings out to my right and slows to pace me, then the window goes down.
Yup, it's those SAME two jamokes in that same jazzed up pickup truck & yea they want to race, AGAIN!!
HA!!

I acknowledge wave 'em off and motion for them to follow me to Kelly's, which they do.

After I pull into the lot & park these two clowns pull up along side, pile outa that heap & greet me like I was their long lost cousin!!
They start going on about how they've been looking for me for months, that at Rietz HS (~where they attend) I, *Landru*, am some kinda "legend" (among the pistonheads) given what'd happened on that cold clear December morning 6 months prior, OK?

These two -- *brothers*, BTW -- tell me of their Pa's reaction to their blowing his $9,000 Ford SVP {?} 330c/in Eaton SC racing engine to kingdom come then.
He acknowledged the kids had "found the weak spot" in a Ford 330 SC motor, the connecting rods!! That *now* he had a "reason" to buy a new beefed-up 330 from some Ford racing engine builder in Chicago!!
Mud I can't make this stuff up, I swear!! :o)

Then the coup de gras, they want me to follow 'em to a church -- where their old man's a Deacon -- so he can MEET me!!
With some trepidation I must admit, I do.

After meeting this really nice man & while kibitzing racing stories he INSISTS I drive his Lightning, now that it has this new racing engine!!
And I say under one condition, that I get to drive it from where we are -- on the "west side" -- to my home in Newburgh -- about 15 miles -- AND that his boy -- the big 17 yea old farm kid, "Nate" -- follow us driving my (then new) '03 collector's edition with his younger brother riding shotgun.
"Nate" just about crapped in his drawers, started babblin' if it'd be OK with his Pa & all that.

Everything went great, I enjoyed driving that silly truck & the even sillier whine it made when the supercharger's spoolin' up under hard acceleration and that kid had the thrill of his life, learned what a real sports car actually *feels* like. ;^)

Long story short, all 3 of those guys have periodically stopped by my home to bullshit, and the last time they came it was in separate cars..one a '04 Mustang Mach 1 & Nate drove a jazzed up 302c/in Foxbody 'stang.
*Both* rel barn burners, for sure.

Nicest damned people ya could ever want to know, and Ford guys -- through & through -- to boot. :o)

Well, gotta scram.
Am off to buy a -- industrial size -- *snowblower* before it's too late.

...thanks for the memory, bucko. {g}

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