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How to bury [Islamic] terrorists
The Naple News ^ | 12/9/02 | DEROY MURDOCK

Posted on 12/09/2002 8:20:41 AM PST by 1bigdictator

Deroy Murdock: How to bury terrorists As America defends itself in a war we did not start, what we must do need not be pretty.

Monday, December 9, 2002

By DEROY MURDOCK, Scripps Howard News Service

NEW YORK — An Israeli airliner's narrowly averted destruction over Mombasa, Kenya on Nov. 28 proves that al Qaeda possesses surface-to-air missiles and will use them against passenger jets.

In news accounts late last month, a Pakistani nuclear scientist's son said that before 9-11, Osama bin Laden asked his father to build him an atomic weapon. That's "not child's play," the scientist reportedly replied. Let's hope bin Laden's luck has not improved.

There is a low-tech answer to such high-tech threats: Pork. America should declare that the remains of terrorists who commit suicide attacks or are executed here will be wrapped in pigskins and lard and buried in unmarked graves.

New York commentator Deroy Murdock analyzes national issues.

According to the Moskovsky Komsomolets newspaper, that is how Russian authorities handled the bodies of 50 Chechen terrorists who commandeered a Moscow theater on Oct. 23. This hard-ball tactic toward mass murderers dovetails with their unbending faith in their twisted interpretation of Islam. They believe that contact with hogs slams the Pearly Gates shut. Hello, Miss Piggy. Goodbye, 72 virgins.

Plagued by Islamic terrorists in the southern Philippines, U.S. Army General John "Blackjack" Pershing's troops captured six Muslim guerrillas in 1911. "You'll never see Paradise," one officer told the militants before five of them were shot with bullets dipped in pig fat and later shrouded in pigskins and buried among pork entrails. The surviving terrorist was allowed to escape, whereupon he told his comrades what he witnessed. The jihad stopped immediately, and peace prevailed for years.

Compare this to the treatment of Mir Aimal Kasi. He was executed Nov. 14 in a Virginia prison for fatally shooting CIA employees Frank Darling and Lansing Bennett and wounding three others near the agency's headquarters in 1993. "There is no God but Allah," Kasi repeated until a lethal injection hushed him for good.

Officials returned Kasi's body to his family in Quetta, Pakistan. A crowd of 10,000 turned his outdoor funeral into a giant rally. "Aimal, martyr of Islam," one banner read. "Down with America," mourners shouted. Terrorists who die on U.S. territory never should go home.

This policy is tailor-made for nine of the Sept. 11 hijackers whose remains were pulled from the Pentagon and a field in Shanksville, Pa. What's left of them is being held as evidence by the FBI. As CBS News described them, these eight Saudis and one Lebanese are considered heroes by many in the Muslim world and would be applauded if delivered to their families. Instead, they should be the first to experience America's new, get-tough interments for Islamic killers.

America did not ask for this war. Unfortunately, we may have to go medieval to defeat an unenlightened enemy eager to repeal the Renaissance.

The message is simple: "Mess with us, and your moms and dads never will see you again. We will wrap you in bacon and stick you in secret graves on a pig farm deep inside the Great Satan. If not for eternity, at least for decades, swine will frolic in the mud above your ham-soaked bones. Any questions?"

If this approach keeps pirated jets out of our skyscrapers, the terrorists will have lost.

Is this a perfect solution? No. Muslim fanatics still could attack us.

But rather than simply perish here, each would have to survive and flee, lest he jeopardize his posthumous access to six dozen chaste sex slaves.

It will be far harder to unleash fresh carnage if the perpetrators must arrange get-away cars and escape routes rather than simply commit suicide among their victims.

Also, Islamist mullahs could issue fatwas allowing "martyrs" to mix with pig flesh. Let them. Their followers will wonder how their spiritual leaders could permit something so clearly prohibited. Let the heads of would-be Islamic butchers clang with cognitive dissonance.

Finally, Muslims worldwide might denounce porcine burials. But if this practice slows or stops terrorists, it will justify the denunciations.

As America defends itself in a war we did not start, what we must do need not be pretty. Is this all rather macabre? Yes, but so is the fact that medical examiners used DNA analysis on a crushed helmet's sweat-stained lining to identify FDNY captain Brian Hickey as one of the 2,795 innocents murdered at the World Trade Center.

America did not ask for this war. Unfortunately, we may have to go medieval to defeat an unenlightened enemy eager to repeal the Renaissance.

New York commentator Deroy Murdock is a columnist with the Scripps Howard News Service.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; Foreign Affairs; Front Page News; Government; Israel; News/Current Events; US: California; US: District of Columbia; US: Florida; US: New Jersey; US: New York; United Kingdom
KEYWORDS: terrorists
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To: dcwusmc
I think we will see the virtual end of the insane murder cult. It's going to evaporate like snow in the sahara.
41 posted on 12/09/2002 8:56:52 PM PST by Travis McGee
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To: 1bigdictator
They believe that contact with hogs slams the Pearly Gates shut. Hello, Miss Piggy. Goodbye, 72 virgins.

This is the funniest thing I’ve read all night. Hope it's true; it would make defeating the Islamic terrorists a piece of pig. LOL!

42 posted on 12/09/2002 9:00:14 PM PST by SwordofTruth
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To: Travis McGee
Is GDG correct in #29?
___________________

I don't know much about this idea. I would test it out. Start burying their dead in pigskins and see if it affects the Jihad. I fear Islam would issue Fatwahs saying a martyr is not affected by being buried in pig skin.
43 posted on 12/10/2002 12:48:37 AM PST by dennisw
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To: SwordofTruth
I think the contact would have to be PRIOR to death. Maybe wrapping them in a pigskin just prior to shooting them would do the trick. I had made the suggestion to a Marine Col. in November 2001. Dunno how far up the chain it went. I also added the suggestion that an Imam be found who would condemn the soon-to-be dead to hell for their deeds. That WOULD assure them of their lack of companionship in the afterlife (except for their sheep or their buds in the next burner...)
44 posted on 12/10/2002 8:02:59 AM PST by dcwusmc
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To: Travis McGee
I am not sure, but I know that muslims believe that on the last day they will be ressurected. So technicly this means it does not matter how they died or buried.
45 posted on 12/10/2002 12:57:37 PM PST by knighthawk
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To: Travis McGee
Blackjack Pershing Bump!
46 posted on 12/11/2002 3:05:49 PM PST by Matthew James
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To: Korrupt
Better yet, let's starve some pigs a little bit and have them eat the remains of any terrorist. We could film it and put it on the web, let Al Jazeera play it, and then play it on pay-per view in the U.S. with the proceeds going to the families of victims of 9-11.

This is some of the most marvelous writing and thinking since Hubert Selby and Terry Southern's Magic Christian.
47 posted on 12/11/2002 3:10:41 PM PST by Vinomori
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To: Matthew James
Are those Pershing stories truth or apocrypha?
48 posted on 12/11/2002 3:19:32 PM PST by Travis McGee
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To: demosthenes the elder
I agree. Actually this procedure can be reviewed on film since THE REAL GLORY (1939) starring Gary Cooper and David Niven showed the Phillipine pig burial incident (a bit of historical fiction).
49 posted on 12/11/2002 3:52:27 PM PST by tomswiftjr
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To: Travis McGee
Good question - that's been the topic of discussion at work. The consensus is that it's true, but I have no proof at this time. --Nobody's had the time to do the real research!
50 posted on 12/14/2002 8:39:15 AM PST by Matthew James
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To: Travis McGee
Totally true.

Pershing was respected so much by the Imams on the islands after this that they made him a Chief of ALL the tribes.

Frank Vandiver's BLACK JACK describes it in great detail.

51 posted on 12/14/2002 8:44:50 AM PST by Pistolshot
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To: river rat; xm177e2; Travis McGee
*grins*
all are dimly remembered excerpts from a bogus/spoof AP report I cooked up in the middle of the air campaign prior to the ground offensive in Desert Storm.
Additional bits I recall are "...a lard slick in the Persian Gulf drifting slowly towards the newly renamed Straits of Hormel..." and "shell-shocked iraqi prisoners of war complain about the inhuman devices, saying "SPAMM is the Devil's work!""
I wish I still had that paper - it was a hoot.
52 posted on 12/14/2002 10:42:36 AM PST by demosthenes the elder
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To: dcwusmc
solution: execution by firing squad, armed with raw pork bullets. At close range, a meat bullet (especially if frozen) is just as lethal as a metal one. side benefit: the meat is indistinguishable from human tissue by normal means, so no muslim undertaker would be able to separate the Allah-offending pollution from the corpse.
53 posted on 12/14/2002 10:46:42 AM PST by demosthenes the elder
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To: jiggyboy; luckodeirish; river rat; Travis McGee; xm177e2; BOBWADE; CARepubGal; Vinomori; All

KILLS THUGS DEAD!

(and bars them from Paradise)

54 posted on 12/14/2002 11:01:29 AM PST by demosthenes the elder
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To: demosthenes the elder
ROTFLOL!
55 posted on 12/14/2002 2:51:21 PM PST by BOBWADE
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Comment #56 Removed by Moderator

To: BOBWADE; skull stomper
just for the record:
mhking coughed up the original RAID can and so far as I know made the initial reference to wiping out pests...
a user by the nik of Dark Nerd inserted the dead jihadi graphic and the "JIHADI" text. All I did was tweak "RAID" into "LARD" and add the motto.
57 posted on 12/15/2002 11:30:16 AM PST by demosthenes the elder
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